How to Live like A Dead Poet
by HeadinTheClouds13
Summary: Ever wanted to know how to eat your toast like Neil? Make a bed like Charlie? Eat an Oreo like Todd? A guide on how to live your life like a Dead Poet!
1. Toast

**Disclaimer: Ya I own Dead Poets Society, I'm also the lost Princess of Norway. **_**Right.**_

**A.N. Okay, I just wanted to try out this idea I've had bugging me since forever. Please give me some feed back! If you, loved it, hated it, or your goldfish just died and you need to talk about it... TELL ME! Now on with the show! **

**Dedicated to thatdrncat who came up with how Todd would make his toast.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 1: Toast**

How to make your toast like,

Neil: Toast bread to any degree, put on whatever condements happen to be handy. Put slices together to form a toast sandwich. Eat while running off somewhere.

Charlie: Burn bread. Tear into small peices. Flick said pieces and Cameron.

Todd: Toast bread a light golden brown. Spread on strawberry jam. And only strawberry jam. Eat slowly.

Cameron: _I'm sorry. This page appears to be ripped out. _

Meeks: Bread must be toasted for exactly 1.2 minutes. Then buttered left to right, first with the peice that came out of the left side of the toaster and them the right. The peice that is more toasted is to be eaten first, from top to bottom.

Knox: Lightly crisp bread, cut off crusts and butter. Eat each peice in one go .

Pitts: Pitts doesn't eat toast! Don't you know this! Doesn't anyone pay attention to him!? _Sigh _

**Thanks for reading! -Cloudy**


	2. Oreo's

**Disclaimer: Ya I own Dead Poets Society, I'm also the lost Princess of Norway. **_**Right.**_

**A.N. I don't know if Oreo's were around in 1959 but I really wanted to do this chapter!**

**Dedicated to anyone who eats their Oreo's upside down. (Like me!)**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 2: Oreo's**

How to Eat an Oreo like:

Neil: Bite off top part of the cookie. Scrape off icing with your teeth. Throw away the second half.

Charlie: Twist Oreo apart, lick away the white part. (Do this in a sexual manner, especially if Cameron happens to be near by.)

Todd: Nibble slowly, check your progress ever few seconds.

Cameron: _I'm sorry, but I cannot imagine Cameron eating an Oreo...I __promise__ I'll do him next time._

Meeks: Break cookie into 2 peices. Dunk one half in milk, eat other half plain.

Knox: Eat the top half and suck on the second half. Don't eat the icing.

Pitts: Drop in a glass intil soggy. Fish out with a spoon.

**Awwww, can you imagine Todd eating an Oreo? That would be so adorable.**

**-Cloudy**

**P.s. If you have a "How to" idea, I'm totally up for that!**


	3. Dates

**Disclaimer: Ya I own Dead Poets Society, I'm also the lost Princess of Norway. **_**Right.**_

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 3: Dates**

How to Ask Someone out on a Date like:

Neil: Perform a scene from _Romeo and Juliet. _Include props.

Charlie: You don't ask them out, they ask _you_ out.

Todd: Mumble and blush. Enough said.

Cameron: Brag about what college your going to and how you get top grades in all you classes. _What girl wouldn't love to hear that? _

Meeks: Tell them all about how you built a radio. An illegal radio.

Knox: Get beat up by their boyfriend so they'll feel bad. Then come to their school and read them a poem. Then wait until they come to your school to tell you off, you might get a date out of it. _(Or a restraining order )_

Pitts: Tell them about how you might be going to Yale... or might not.

**Whoot! Two updates in one day! I'm on fire! **

**-Cloudy**


	4. Spiders

**Disclaimer: Ya I own Dead Poets Society, I'm also the lost Princess of Norway. **_**Right.**_

**Dedicated To my Amazing Best Friend Maureen. This chapter was totally her idea.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 4: Spiders**

How to Deal with a Spider in your Shower like:

Neil: Trap it under a cup and release it outside.

Todd: Get Neil to deal with it

Charlie: Squish it, wipe your hands on Cameron.

Cameron: Scream.

Meeks: Get a different shower. Duh.

Knox: Take it out of the shower and Name it Chris...Chris...

Pitts: Try and move it out of the shower without having to touch it, or have it touch you.

**A.N. Okay Lovely/Adorable/Brilliant/Amazing Readers. I was looking at hits for this story-type thing and there were...quite a few actually. Now I get that sometimes people don't want to/can't think of a good review, I am not asking for that. All I ask is that you leave me the Letter 'W'. Really that's not alot to ask, just a 'W' to show me that your actually reading.**

**Thanks,**

**Cloudy**

**P.s. I'm borrowing this idea, I can't remember where I saw it but If it's your give me a heads up and I'll give you some credit.**


	5. Bed's

**Disclaimer: Ya I own Dead Poets Society, I also invented Microwave Popcorn...**_**Right.**_

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 5: Beds**

How to Make A Bed Like:

Neil: Flaten out the sheets a bit and fold in the top blanket so it looks like you made it even if you didn't. _(Ya I do this...)_

Todd: Do it exactly as they taught you in etiquette classes. Bouce quarters off it for extra effect.

Charlie: DON'T!

Knox: Start to do it as always but get distracted thinking about a certain blonde cheerleader _(gag)._

Cameron: Don't they have people to do things like that?

Meeks: Um...do it normally. Then do Charlie's.

Pitts: Pfff...What's the point in making you bed? I mean your just going to mess it up again.

**A.n. Sorry If this sucks...My muses have decided to abandon me, but I really wanted to post something for my fabulous, adorable, amazing, readers!**

**Reviews: W system still applies. Half an hour in the Indian Cave with Poet of their choice for anyone who reviews! **


	6. Detention!

**Disclaimer: Ya I own Dead Poets Society, I also invented Microwave Popcorn...**_**Right.**_

**Warning: Implied Meeks/Charlie (Muwanda!)**

**Dedicated To Tusk of Thyme because we share a brain.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 6: DETENTION!**

How to Do Detention Time Like:

Neil: I'm pretty sure Neil doesn't get detentions...

Todd: Stare out window. Twindle thumbs. Watch clock.

Charlie: Bug Meeks or have crazy mad sex with Meeks. Either works.

Knox: Write creepy, borderline stalker poetry.

Cameron: Complain to the teacher how you really shouldn't be here since it was all Charlie's fault...

Meeks: _See 'Charlie'_

Pitts: Work on your "Radar" for "Science".

**A.n. Yay! It's update-tastic! Seriously I loves all you guys, Thanks for being supportive of my lack of updates and reviewing!**

**Reviews: W! A Two hour 'detention' with poet of ones choice for anyone who reviews! (If your a guy, and that's not your thing you can always just play gin or something. It doesn't have to be sexual at all.)**

**And at the end of the day we all learned an important lesson: Paper beats rock!**

**-C**


	7. Gifts

**Disclaimer: Nope, don't own. Maybe if I'm lucky I'll get it for my birthday**

**Dedicated To Starryeyed () this is based off an awesome idea she gave me.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 7: Gifts**

How To Pick A Gift For Someone When You Don't Know What They Want, Like:

Neil: End up buying them whatever the saleperson suggests.

Todd: Wander around the store helplessly for hours on end before just getting a card.

Charlie: Don't buy them a gift. It's not worth the effort really. Plus if they're upset about it you can always use the old fall back of show up at they're house naked.

Knox: Follow them around for a few days to help yourself get an idea of what they might want.

Cameron: Buy them something you would want so if they don't like it they can give it to you.

Meeks: Give them money. _ Everyone _likes money.

Pitts: Just pickout the first thing you see in the store.

**A.N. Hey guys, now that my personal life has calmed down a bit -yes I do actually have one shocking as that is- I'm going to try and update about every other day for a couple of weeks before my life gets hectic again.**

**I just wanted to say thanks for reading and reviewing as well as giving me a whole truckload of good ideas, I really and truely love you guys.**

**As response to Starreyeyed()'s question the poet I swoon over usually rotates between Knox and Pitts, though I have basically liked every poet at one point or another (Yes including Cameron, sad I know.)**

**Reviews: You know the drill. 25 mins in the changeroom with poet of one's choice for thoose who review.**

**-C **


	8. Parental Units

**Disclaimer: Nope, don't own. Maybe if I'm lucky I'll get it for my birthday **

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 8: Parental units**

How To Avoid Spending Time With Your Parents Like:

Neil: Insist that you _really _need to study so you can "get ahead".

Todd: Stand perfectly still. Hopefully they won't notice you. _(Poor Todd!)_

Charlie: Sneak out of the house and go make out with anyone who happens to be in the vicinity. _(Show of hands: who wants to be in the same vicinty as Charlie?)_

Knox: Prentend to be talking on the phone with someone. _(I do this ALOT.)_

Cameron: Why wouldn't you want to spend time with your parents?

Meeks: Just leave where they are and go somewhere else. It's really not a hard thing to do.

Pitts: Hide in your room and work on your "Science project"

**A.n. Whoot! 2 updates in a day, I don't really LOVE this one but it's okay. I'm really going to try and have alot of updates over the next few weeks for you lovely people.**

**-C**


	9. Detention The Prequel

**Disclaimer: Nope, don't own. Maybe if I'm lucky I'll get it for my birthday (Also borrowing idea's from Avoiding Confession by Tusk of Thyme (though I actually came up with that idea...))**

**For Haykatsi, just 'cause.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 9: DETENTION! (The Prequel)**

**How to **_**get**_** Detention like:**

Neil: Again. Neil doesn't get detention!

Todd:_**I HAVE NO IDEA. **__(Ya, it's serious when it's underlined bolded and in italics...)_

Charlie: Exist.

Knox: Waste class time writing your creepy, stalker-ish poetry.

Cameron: Stand near Charlie.

Meeks: Freak out at Charlie for stealing your socks and then call him a man-whore.

Pitts: Skip class, who needs history anyways? (Carpe Diem right?)


	10. Horror Movie

**Disclaimer: Wait. What? I ****don't**** own Dead Poets Society. Damn.**

**SLASHYISH! **

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 10: Horror Movie**

What To Do When Your Freaked Out By A Scary Movie And Can't Sleep _Big Breath_ Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Go and crawl into bed with Todd, 'cause you know he's scared too.

Todd:Close your eyes really tight and just try not to think about it (or wait for Neil to come over wink wink).

Charlie: Beat off. It helps distract you...No, seriously.

Knox: Get up and sit in the bathroom for hours on end.

Cameron: Curl up into a little ball and try and ignore all the weird noises _(being made by Charlie)._

Meeks: ... _I'm sorry Meeks has fallen asleep..._

Pitts: Try to not think about the Blue Unicorn._ (Did anyone else's parents do this with them?)_

**A.N. HOMIGOD! I've done 10 chapters?! SERIOUSLY? Just wanted to thank you guys for the billionth time because you rock THAT hard. Round of applause.**

**So the story behind this chapter is yesterday I watched Sweeney Todd and then was home alone all night. It didn't **_**really**_** (total lie) scare me much except for the toe in the pie, shudder which more just freaked me out. ALOT. (I am never eating meat pie again...)**

**P.s. Happy Belated Cananda Day to my Canandian Homies, and Happy early Independance Day to my American Homies! Also happy Crawfish appreciation week.**


	11. Partytime!

**Disclaimer: Wait. What? I ****don't**** own Dead Poets Society. Damn.**

**MORE SLASHYNESS! (NO insulting Muwanda, I loves that pairing...)**

**For: Marisa A.K.A. MrsJesseSpencer, 'cause I said I would. **

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 11: Partytime!**

How To Act When Invited To A Party Where You Know No-one, Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Stand near the front and act like you know everyone.

Todd:Stand near the back and make sure you don't know anyone.

Charlie: Hit on girls who look easy and/or drunk, end up in the back closet with Meeks,

Knox: Get drunk, kiss the girl "of your dreams" while she's sleeping and get beat up by her boyfriend. (It's like that really happened...)

Cameron: _Cameron? Invited to a party? Hysterical laughter_

Meeks: Get suckered into the back closet with Charlie...

Pitts: disappear for most of the night and show up at the end with a whole bunch of hickeys.

**A.N. I must either really love you guys or have no social life...I'm guessing a bit of both.**


	12. FANGIRLS! RUN!

**Disclaimer: Wait. What? I ****don't**** own Dead Poets Society. Damn.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 12: Fangirls**

How to Get Crazy Fangirls (and guys but mostly girls.) To Leave You Alone Like:

Neil: Wax off your eyebrows. (I think I just died a bit inside)

Todd: Hide in a closet.

Charlie: What? Why would you want them to leave you alone?

Knox: Go on and on about how you and Chris are totally an item, until they get annoyed and go away. (To kill Chris...)

Cameron:_ There have never been any reports of any Fangirls pestering Cameron..._

Meeks: Just leave.

Pitts: Actually make a radar for science. (That would break my heart.)

**A.N. So this one was a bit odd...**

**REVIEW! REVIEW! REVIEW!**


	13. Intermission

**Disclaimer: Wait. What? I ****don't**** own Dead Poets Society. Damn.**

**Dedicated to cryingblacktears who helped me hide the wax from Neil. Lol.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 13 (Ya! Lucky number!): Intermission**

How To Spend Your Intermission Time Like A Dead Poet

Neil: Freak out and come up with theories on how the play is going to end. As well as discuss who was your favourite actor, actress, etc...

Todd: Nod when Neil pauses to breath. (Stolen from Doctor Who, don't kill me Russel T. Davies...)

Charlie: Hang out in the lobby, look sexy, basic Nuwanda type things.

Knox: Run to call Chris the minute the lights go up.

Cameron:Get locked in the bathroom and miss the second act.

Meeks: Go to the bathroom. It's kind of what the intermission is for...

Pitts: Stretch. Read the playbill. Be awesome.


	14. Subway

**Disclaimer: Me? Owns Dead Poets Society? If only...(Fangirl fantasy to dirty for the rating of this fic.)**

**SAVING ME! THIS IS FOR YOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUU!!**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 14: Subway**

How To Act On The Subway Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Smile at everyone, even the people with their hands in their coats.

Todd: Sit as close to Neil or as far away from anyone else as possible.

Charlie: Talk to the most attractive person on the car. Ignore everyone else.

Knox: Try and look cool holding on the railing while standing up and fall over every time the train starts. _(It's so funny when Tourists do this...heheheh.)_

Cameron:Excuse me? Public Transportation? That's for poor people. _(HEY!)_

Meeks: Look adorably confused whenever the voice comes over the speakers.

Pitts: Get everyone singing a rousing rendition of 'Santa Fe'.

**A.N. ACTUALLY written on the subway, after Title of Show (Anyone who's in New York this summer go see it!) **

**Yes I did just make a reference to RENT, what ya gonna do about it? (Even though RENT hadn't even been written yet, but whatever.)**

**Subway Ride with the Poets (Except Cameron, who can take the bus) for my lovely, adorable, brilliant, Reviewers.**


	15. Hide And Seek

**Disclaimer: Me? Owns Dead Poets Society? If only...(Fangirl fantasy to dirty for the rating of this fic.)**

**Slashity, slash, slash.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 15: Hide And Seek**

How To Play Hide And Seek Like A Dead Poet (When Charlie's "It"):

Neil: Go "Hide" with Todd.

Todd: Go "Hide" with Neil.

Charlie: Find (Unfortuanalty) Todd and Neil. "Hiding"

Knox: Hide under some sort of vegatation, unfortunatly on a red ant hill. Be too cool to leave because you want to win.

Cameron:Hide and Seek? Are you kidding me? For god's sake 'HeadinTheClouds13' (If that is your real name(_It's not, my real name is...FOOLS! You'll never know! Bwahahahahah!)_), are you trying to torture me? (_Yes, yes I am.)_

Meeks: Use a cunning stratagy of logic and timing. Get caught anyways, because of allergies.

Pitts: Get caught first because your so adorkably tall.

**A.N. Ladies and Gentlemen! We are at War! A Review War! So...REVIEW! Ya know, so we'll...win. (Boy my pep talks really go downhill...)**

**Okay, in all seriousness I'm tryign to get more reviews on this than Tusk of Thyme has on any of her stories. (Even though I have more per chapter! HA!)**


	16. Summer CampFood

**Disclaimer: Me? Owns Dead Poets Society? If only...(Fangirl fantasy to dirty for the rating of this fic.)**

**For KAYLA! Because she'll eat anything...**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 16: Summer Camp**

How To Survive off Summer Camp Food Like:

Neil: Just eat lots and lots of bread.

Todd: Try and look at the food as little as possible...

Charlie: Sneak out and go buy burgers on the highway at 3 a.m. Your not eating that stuff the try and pass off as food.

Knox: Freak out about it. OMIGOD! What's that blue thing on the croutons!

Cameron:Demand to speak to the chef about it.

Meeks: Say your not hungry and eat stuff you brought from home later.

Pitts: Uh, food is food. It all tastes the same.

**A.N. I'm going to Camp next week and had a flip out over how gross camp food is. I'm like Meeks, I always bring "real" food. **


	17. Don't Get Your Hopes Up

**Not really an Update...**

**FRIENDS! ROMANS! COUNTRYMEN! LEND ME YOUR EARS!:**

**Okay you lovely people here's the deal. I'm heading off to camp for a week (hense the camp based chapter.) starting the 13th (which is also my Birthday! Yay!) until the 19th. If you want to PM me or anything that's cool just don't expect a quick answer.**

**I also have a question, it was believed by me that Chris was widely dis-liked but I have found a few people defending her (GASP!), I was just wondering what your guy's feelings about her were.**

**Anyways, Stay cool,**

**Cloudy The 1st Only and Awesome**


	18. LOCKED IN!

**Disclaimer: Peter Weir wouldn't swap with me, so I guess I still don't own.**

**I don't know what happened to me. This fic used to be so clean...**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 17: LOCKED IN!**

How To Pass The Time When You Get Locked In The School Kitchens:

Neil: _(XXX)_

Todd: _(XXX)_

Charlie: Pfft. He didn't _really_ get locked in. It was just to make a statement about the crappy food. SERIOUSLY!

Knox: Use all the pots and pans to start a impromtu one man steel band.

Cameron:What? Why would I be locked in the Kitchens? Going into the kitchens is against school rules! Are you implying that I would break school rules?

Meeks: Cunningly make a lock pick using only a spork a mousetrap and a spaltula.

Pitts: Eat all the cold tatter tots from last week.

**A.N. This was sort of based of past experiences...**


	19. Procrastionation

**Disclaimer: Peter Weir wouldn't swap with me, so I guess I still don't own.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 18: Procrastination**

How To Procrastinate Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Re-arange all of the clothes in your closet on a scale of how much Todd likes them.

Todd: Practise looking invisible.

Charlie: _I'll let you guys run with this one..._

Knox: Practice asking out Chris in the mirror. Also practice looking cool.

Cameron:Write a detailed list of all the things against the rules you've seen Charlie do.

Meeks: Re-write out all of your notes for Charlie's "use".

Pitts: Stand on top of the tower and shout things at the people in the courtyard.

**A.N. HOORAH! I bailed out my muses and can write again! Ya ya I know it's not camp related but I'm not really in the mood to write about campi-ness.**

**I was also wondering if anyone knows any good prompt challenges besides the 100 one? I really want to do some "actual" writing. **

**Reviews: 20 Minutes of "Procrastination" with Charlie per review.**


	20. Teeth

**Disclaimer: Peter Weir wouldn't swap with me, so I guess I still don't own.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 19: Teeth**

How To Brush Your Teeth Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Brush your teeth so hard they sparkle (and your gums bleed).

Todd: Floss like crazy, and use an entire tube of paste getting them clean.

Charlie: Just down some mouthwash. Your breath is all the they're going to notice anyways.

Knox: Put some toothpaste in your mouth and swish it around with water.

Cameron:Use the _only_ aloud amount of toothpaste and brush for _only_ the length suggested by dental proffessionals.

Meeks: Um, put paste on the brush and...you know...brush.

Pitts: Up like a flower, down like the rain, back and forth like a Choo-choo train.

**A.N. God this is going to be my last update for a few days 'cause I won't have any access to a computer. Until then REVIEW!! **

**Oh and a prize to who ever can tell me where Pitts' thing is from.**


	21. Sickie

**Disclaimer: Peter Weir wouldn't swap with me, so I guess I still don't own.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 20: Sickie**

How To Fake Sick Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Faint dramatically in the hallway, and insist repeatedly that your "Fine" and "It's not as bad as it looked."

Todd: Lie in bed and cough softly every few minutes. Look miserable.

Charlie: Dump a bottle of water into the toliet while retching. Insist your too weak to do any homework.

Knox: "Pretend" to have an allergic reaction to some mushrooms or something. ("Pretend" a.k.a. Say you were just faking when you actually have swollen up and can't even talk.)

Cameron:_ Fake sick? _Never.

Meeks: Um...You don't really _need_ to fake sick. I mean you don't really miss much class unless you have a migrain or something...

Pitts: Research some crazy rare jungle fever and say you might have caught it in Vermount.

**A.N. Vermount is VERY dangerous... Heheheheh last post until about Monday.**

**Omigod, Breaking Dawn's coming out on Saturday! Yes, yes, I jumped on the Twilight band wagon, so sue me. Soanyone got an opion? Edward? Jacob? (Forget them! I'm on Team Mike! He's a cutie.) Okay, okay, I just want to know what people think I find it cool! Actually I might start asking your opions more often, they're very interesting. (That was not in anyway sarcastic, I'm dead serious.)**


	22. All Nighter

**Disclaimer: If I owned Dead Poets Society...Todd and Neil would be together...and Meeks and Charlie...and Neil would be alive...And his dad would be cool with his acting...and Pitts would be MINE...and we'd be snogging in the cave right now...So nope, I don't own.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 21: All Nighter**

How To Stay Up All Night Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Run around your dorm trying to steal things off of Todd.

Todd: Dump ice down your back and try and keep Neil away from youe stuff.

Charlie: Go hang out with Meeks, that'll _defentaly _keep you awake.

Knox: _(I'm sorry though he tried VERY hard to stay awake, Knox has fallen asleep.)_

Cameron:_ All night?_ What do you _want_ to get bad grades?

Meeks: Just keep reminding yourself what Charlie'll do if you fall asleep.

Pitts: Two words. Diet Pepsi.

**A.N. Okay so apperantly Welton is in Vermount, but I'm sure it's still quite dangerous. I almost got hit by a bus there, like yesterday.**

**OH! And I wanted to tell you guys when I was at my Grandparents's we went to their friend's who lives in this huge house, and apparently it was owned by a family of Dalton's AND there was a fire in one of the rooms in 1959. Isn't that crazy!?**

**Who needs Prozac when you have reviews?? **


	23. Break it Down

**Disclaimer: If I owned Dead Poets Society...Todd and Neil would be together...and Meeks and Charlie...and Neil would be alive...And his dad would be cool with his acting...and Pitts would be MINE...and we'd be snogging in the cave right now...So nope, I don't own.**

**Look! I'm doing it! Happy now!?**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 22: Break It Down**

How To Dance Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Just sort of hop from one foot to the other. Try and get Todd involved.

Todd: Look around nervously and try not to have to dance with Neil. _(My friend does this "nervous look" thing when ever we're at dances. It's her signature move, Todd's just borrowing it.)_

Charlie: Jump around and throw yourself around. Include a slide or two.

Knox: Try and impress people with your mad skills but end up falling over the couch.

Cameron:Stiffly tap your foot and snap your fingers.

Meeks: Let yourself be pulled around and spun by Charlie.

Pitts: Sway ackwardly while keeping your hands firmly in your pockets.

**A.N. YOU MUST ALL BOW DOWN! I mean seriously, two updates in one day? That's pretty spiffy.**

**I would also like 2 SEPERATE reviews for these chapters I posted today, just because I fell I deserve recognition for both. Also another thanks to you guys for being so supportive. I REALLY would have stopped atleast 10 chapters ago if it weren't for all your brilliant ideas and your lovely support. **

**-C**


	24. BRAIN FREEZE!

**Disclaimer: If I owned Dead Poets Society...Todd and Neil would be together...and Meeks and Charlie...and Neil would be alive...And his dad would be cool with his acting...and Pitts would be MINE...and we'd be snogging in the cave right now...So nope, I don't own.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 23: BRAIN FREEZE!!**

How To Deal with Brain Freeze Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Go "uuuuhhhh uuuhhhh uuuuhhhhh" and flap your hands around your mouth until it goes away.

Todd: Say very softly "I got a brainfreeze" and look adorably sad.

Charlie: Dramatically grab your head and demand something hot to drink.

Knox: Very cooly run to grab anything not cold to eat.

Cameron: Wait for it to go away, while cursing all things cold.

Meeks: Very calmly place your tongue on the top of your mouth to warm it up. Duh.

Pitts: Shove your head in a pillow _(Because that makes ALOT of logical sense...)_.

**I scream! You scream! We all scream for Reviews! Thanks!**

**-C**


	25. Order up!

**Disclaimer: If I owned Dead Poets Society...Todd and Neil would be together...and Meeks and Charlie...and Neil would be alive...And his dad would be cool with his acting...and Pitts would be MINE...and we'd be snogging in the cave right now...So nope, I don't own.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 24: Order up!**

How To Order Something At A Fast Food Resturant Like:

Neil: Walk straight up to the counter and order without hesitating.

Todd: Look at the boards for about 20 minutes before just getting what Neil got.

Charlie: Smirk flirtatiously at the person behind the counter and say "The Regular" (even if you've never been there before.)

Knox: Slip into the counter because the floor was wet and end up just having to get ice...

Cameron: Order what resembles high dinning the most and barely touch it.

Meeks: Order double of everything since Charlie will steal half of it.

Pitts: Freak out and order something your allegic to because the girl behind the couter smiled at you.

**A.N. Based one this one one-shot I have lying around my hard drive. I can totally imagine all the poets heading up to like A&W all crammed into one car. Good times.**


	26. Sleepy Head

**Disclaimer: FOR THE LOVE OF KEATING, I DON'T OWN IT! **

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 25: Sleepy head.**

How To Act After You've Stayed Up All Night:

Neil: Run around stealing peoples poetry, basically the same as when you were trying to STAY awake.

Todd: Walk into walls alot, and stumble like your drunk.

Charlie: Run around hyped-up and blow your sax in peoples ears.

Knox: Act fairly normal considering you actually slept...

Cameron: Be a total rat-faced jerk...oh wait that's normal.

Meeks: Drink alot of coffee and make sure you cover any 'lovebites'.

Pitts: Start laughing at random intervals and quote "Rocky Horror Picture Show" alot.

**A.N. Okay so this time last year I was REALLY tired because...well I dont' knwo why but I was really tired and while we were waiting for our teacher I started going "Lips...lips...lips...lips...lips..." and I got like my enitre class to start doing it. **

**If you love me you'll review.**


	27. Halloween

**Disclaimer: FOR THE LOVE OF KEATING, I DON'T OWN IT! **

**This was kinda Thyme's idea, so it's for her. Even though I inspired it...**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 26: Halloween**

How To Celebrate Halloween Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Dress up and try to convince people your just a _really_ tall 12 year-old.

Todd: Get dragged trick-or-treating with Neil. End up having to be a brown-ish ghost.

Charlie: Run around hyped up on jellybabys and steal peoples underwear (and socks!).

Knox: Say Halloween is for little kids and then later go around stealing everyone's candy.

Cameron: Gorge yourslef on candy your Mummy sent you and end up in the bathroom the rest of the time.

Meeks: Hide your candy from Knox and Charlie and basically be entertained by everyone else.

Pitts: Get all excited for Rocky Horror Picture Show and end up passing out at 11:30.

**A.N. Okay, so The Rocky Horror Picture Show, techinically wasn't out until 1975..but! He might have a timemachine or something, okay so it doesn't make alot of sense but I have creative license. M'kay?**

**If you love me you'll review.**


	28. Christening

**Disclaimer: I'm just playing with the Poets for awhile. I promise I'll return them in (roughly) the same condition.**

How to Live Like A Dead Poet:

Chapter 27: Christening

How To Christen Your New Dorm Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Recite The _real_ four pillars and mark your territory with sticky notes.

Todd: Check and see if the closet is big enough to hide in. _(You know fangirls and the like...)_

Charlie: Smash a bottle of Champagne on the door way, and get crazy drunk. (ORGY!)

Cameron: _I'm just going to ignore Cameron today...He spilt soup on me..._

Knox: Put up your shrine to Chris and eat 3 milky way bars.

Meeks:Um...put your stuff on the bed.

Pitts: Scream out the window and blast your illegal radio.

**A.N. Yes, it's true. I have not in fact fallen off a cliff, (Though I did jump off one awhile back...) I just had some computer problems and the worst case of writers block. So thanks for hanging in there and not threatening me with bodily harm.**

**Love and Fishes**

**-Cloudy **

**P.s. Ya...House reference, don't own House M.D. wish I did, then we could have a crazy cross-over for real...**


	29. BUSTED!

**Disclamier: I'm just playing with the Poets for awhile. I promise I'll return them in (roughly) the same condition.**

How to Live Like A Dead Poet:

Chapter 28: BUSTED!

How To Get In Serious Trouble With Your Dorm Advisor:

Neil: Start shouting "What fools these mortals be" every once and awhile. Especially at teachers.

Todd: Start yelling (mildly) errotic things about Neil in your sleep.

Charlie: Start a fire while trying to make s'mores on the radiator.

Cameron: Keep bothering him with whatever Charlie's doing when he's tryign to do "Important Things".

Knox: Stay up all night on the phone listening to Chris sleep. _(That's not creepy at ALL)_

Meeks: Get busted for being in Charlie's room after lights out helping him with Latin..._(With LATIN. wink wink)_

Pitts: Get totally smashed and run down the halls yelling "I AM THE WIZARD!".

**A.N. So ya, dedicated to all my crazy school friends and my even crazier camp friends, because most of these are atleast partly based on real things.**

**I should REALLY be unpacking right now...oh well. You guys are much much more important.**

**So you know the deal: Read, review, rinse, repeat.**

**-C**


	30. Manly Men

**Disclaimer: I'm just playing with the poets **_**(Kinky) **_**promise I'll return them in **_**(Roughly) **_**the same condition.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet**

**Chapter 29: Manly Men**

**How to Make Your Self Cry Like A Dead Poet:**

Neil: Have someone burn your Midsummer script while you watch.

Todd: Think of something marginally sad and end up bawling all over the floor.

Charlie: Pshhh...Charlie Dalton doesn't cry. He's to manly for that...

Cameron: You don't have to make yourself cry. Charlie will do that for you.

Knox: Poke yourself in the eye with a coat hanger and end up having your eye bleed.

Meeks: Uh...Why would you make yourself cry? You strange, strange people.

Pitts: Two words. Dead. Puppies. _(Or mice!)_

**A.N. So yes, I've decided to forgive Cameron...For the soup thing. Not for the finking thing. Stupid fink. Oh! And in my mind last 20 mins of the movie, NEVER HAPPENED! Thus Charlie was never crying as was anyone else. Got it? Good.**

**-C**

**Read, Review, Rinse, Repeat.**


	31. Double Feature

**Disclaimer: I'm just playing with the poets **_**(Kinky) **_**promise I'll return them in **_**(Roughly) **_**the same condition.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet**

**Chapter 30: Double Feature**

**How To Spend The Time Before A Movie Like A Dead Poet:**

Neil: Eat all of the popcorn you bought and end up having to go get more.

Todd: Try and keep Neil from eating all of the food before the movies started. Fail miserably.

Charlie: Talk loudly, ask someone what time it is ever few seconds. Try and get close to Meeks.

Cameron: Complain about how sticky the floor is.

Knox: Try and get in some action with Chris...end up getting some action with the girl on your other side.

Meeks: Sit quietly checking you watch and avoiding Charlie.

Pitts: Run around the theatre trying to find the best seats. Piss off all the old people in the theatre in the process.

**A.N. OMIGOD! 30 CHAPTERS! PARTAAAAAYYYY! No seriously I'm gonna go get some organic Frito type things, maybe do The Timewarp, Play Twister...**

**Catch you later.**

**-C**

**P.s. A thing on Neil's don't you love those people who eat all of their food before the previews are even done, I laugh at those people.**

**Read, Review, Rinse, Repeat.**


	32. Oh Shiz

**Disclaimer: If I didn't own it last time I'm not going to own it now...God.**

**HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY DAVE! YOU OLD MAN YOU!**

**Also, I wanted to put something in for Samdum. I lubbs you.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet**

**Chapter 31: Oh Shiz...**

**How To Make It Up To Someone When You Forget Their Birthday:**

Neil: Insist you DIDN'T forget and, their birthday has ALWAYS been the day after they said it was.

Todd: Write them a cute poem in which you denounce yourself numerous times and rhyme theatre, with sweeter_. (THEY DON'T RHYME PEOPLE!)_

Charlie: Nothing says "I'm Sorry" like a quick round of naked hide and seek.

Cameron: Well if you forgot, you probably didn't like them very much in the first place.

Knox: Make them a belated birthday card, using almost un-holy amounts of glitter glue.

Meeks: Just buy them what they wanted and give it to them a day later. This isn't rocket science people.

Pitts: Uhhhh...CUPCAKES!

**A.N. Hehehe Torchwood, gotta love crazy slash that's COMPLETELY canon. Okay, I apologize profoundly for my lack of updates but in my defense, NO ONE ELSE IS! Okay that's a lame defense but I'm only human ( Or am I?...).**

**-C**

**P.s. Does anyone KNOW if Balincrest is a boarding school or a private school (Or both)? **

**Read, Review, Rinse, Repeat.**


	33. Notes

**Disclaimer: If I didn't own it last time I'm not going to own it now...God. Also my total inspiration for this was Chapter...Uh...2 I think, from Named For The Sunrise By Haykatsi (EVERYONE! GO READ THAT!), so don't sue!**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet**

**Chapter 32: Notes**

**How To "Borrow" Notes From Someone Like A Dead Poet:**

Neil: Just walk into there room and take them. They won't miss them or anything.

Todd: Spend all day trying to work up the nerve to ask, and end up just re-doing your own.

Charlie: Promise if they let you use there notes you can have a "Private Study Session" later.

Cameron: You don't need to borrow notes you make your own. Ever heard of it? _(Geeeezzz...)_

Meeks: Say: "Hey can I borrow you notes? Okay, thanks" _(Pshhhh, but who likes to think inside the box?)_

Pitts: Cunningly sneak into their room and steal them under a guise of darkness (And while your at it take back you hair straightner).

**A.N. Dude is it just me or does Micheal Phelps look a bit like James Waterson? Plus does he not have GIANT hands! Those things are crazy! Uhhhhhh...right.**

**Anyways...Sorry for my lack of updates, someone snuck into my brain and had a mass killing spree on my muses. Plus, school and what not. I AM **_**trying **_**to update more, so please forgive me. **

**-C**

**Neil says: Read! Review! I'M GONNA BE PUCK!!**


	34. Sickie For real

**Disclaimer: If I didn't own it last time I'm not going to own it now...God. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet**

**Chapter 33: Sickie (For Real)**

**How To Deal With Being Sick like A Dead Poet:**

Neil: Curl in to a ball and melodramatically announce that your dying so they should probably start planning for your funeral. _(FORESHADOWING!!)_

Todd: Feel unbelievably guilty about causing everyone an inconvenience and say you feel "fine" every ten minutes.

Charlie: Order someone to make you some soup, and force Meeks to be with you so he'll get sick too.

Knox: Get up to quickly to demonstrate your "Right as rain" and end up passing out.

Cameron: Act as though you've got a stick shoved up you ass...No wait that's normal...

Meeks: Get practically mauled by Charlie (WHO MADE YOU SICK!) in the process of getting a drink of water.

Pitts: Chug a whole bottle of ginerale until you realise you were supposed to sip it. Oh well.

**A.N. So some of you were wondering where Knox was last chapter. Ya, I'd like to know the same thing. He was also missing from Downfall, now I'm sure if you asked him you'd get a very long winded excuse involving several physical injuries and Chris. So...Ya, Knox, is back.**

**Now I don't want you guys to hate me but I have some baddish news. There won't be any updates for a while due to the fact that i have to go to a Diagnostician (I KNOW WHAT YOUR THINKING!) almost everyday after school until they figure out what's wrong with me. (Dont' freak, it's not a big thing, but I'd rather not discuss my physical health in a fanfic.)**

**Anyways, hope this'll hold you over.**

**Love, Cloudy.**

**P.s. More snatching from Thyme's stuff...ya Meeks...Jigsaw...but whatever it's cool. (Right?)**


	35. Batman!

**Disclaimer: FOR THE LOVE OF KEATING, I DON'T OWN IT! **

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 34: Batman**

How To Get A Bat Out Of Your Room Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Grab a broom and start trying to whack it out the window baseball style.

Todd: Just try to be encouraging and not hit by the broom.

Charlie: Lock yourself in the closet and refuse to leave until it's gone. _(manly...)_

Knox: Try and befriend it, end up getting bitten and needing a rabies shot.

Cameron: Yell: "BAT!" at the top of your lungs until it gets annoyed and flys away.

Meeks: Open the window and turn off the lights, that's what your supposed to do.

Pitts: Ummm, nothing since your still fast asleep yelling about how: "It doesn't have a steering wheel you moron!"

**A.N. Hehehehehe, Leadership camp, fun times. I'm always in the disaster cabins...Leg cramps, pregnancy tests, sleep talking (Yelling), bats...best week of my life!**

**Anyways I seem to have been wrong about the being sick interfering with my writing because that's basically all I'm allowed to do in this stupid waiting room. (Sigh) Also being hyped up on painkillers gives you surprisingly good ideas.**

**If you love me you'll review.**


	36. Lost?

**Disclaimer: I don't own Dead Poets Society. Ya, sorry to disappoint you.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 35: Lost**

How To Find Your Way Around A Big City Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Just follow your 'Manly instincts'. You have to end up somewhere.

Todd: Figure out ahead of time where you going so when Neil's 'manly instincts' get you lost you can figure out where you going.

Charlie: Ask cute girls for directions. End up at a strip club. _(true story)_

Knox: Ask people for directions for a street only to realise you've been on it for 20 minutes.

Cameron: Stand like a dork in front of a subway map for 30 minutes trying to figure out where Central park is. _(This is probably the most annoying thing ever in the history of everything.)_

Meeks: It's called a map. Ever heard of it?

Pitts: Pshhhhh, who needs to find there way? Lost is the new found you know.

**A.N. Hey guys, I'm considering (CONSIDERING! KEY WORD!) doing a bunch of one-shots that go along with each of the "How To's" and I wanted to know if you guys would be interested in that. Anyways go review. **

**-C**

**Todd Says:**

**Read.**

**Review.**

**Mumble mumble. (aaaaaaawwwwwwww)**


	37. Xanadu?

**Disclaimer: I OWN IT ALL!! MWAHAHAHAHAHA. Oh...almost had you.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 36: Xanadu?**

How To Get Your Muses Working Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Jump around the cave screaming lines until you feel inspired _(Or hurt yourself)._

Todd: Insult great poets, it always works.

Charlie: Sex.

Knox: Sit completely still in the dark for hours on end mumbling: "Chris, Chris, Chris, Chris..."

Cameron: Who needs muses? Just give the teacher something generic they want to hear.

Meeks: Just start writing. Something has to come out eventually.

Pitts: Write a list of words that rhyme with your favourite colour; purple.

**A.N. Blahhhhhh, I'm honestly trying to work on the one-shots but my mind just isn't functioning properly today. If you guys have a particular "How to" that's your favourite and would want me to do ASAP just tell me in your lovely review. Which you will now go off to write. Yay!**

**-C**

**P.s. Hypothetical cookies for everyone who gets the title reference.**

**Charlie says:**

**Read!**

**Review!**

**SEX!SEX!SEX!**


	38. Kids Stuff

**Disclaimer: I OWN IT ALL!! MWAHAHAHAHAHA. Oh...almost had you. (Also I don't own Flight Of The Concords or 'Albi The Racist Dragon')**

**For Haykatsi, 'cause she asked for it once and I ignored her...Sorry 'bout that.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 37: Kids Stuff**

How To Handle Small Children Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Reenact a thrilling performance of "Albi The Racist Dragon". Crazy Albanian accents included.

Todd: Play "presto-change-o" in a very large box, act surprised when the kids keep being the same things over and over.

Charlie: Bribe them with candy to behave, realising to late that doesn't work. Freak out and bribe Meeks _(with candy...)_ to help.

Knox: Set them lose on a park so you can spend your time stalking Chris. End up having to explain to several angry parents why their kids went missing.

Cameron: _(Who would ask Cameron to look after there kids? Really? Really! Really...Really.)_

Meeks: Ask them what they want to do. Then do it. Yes, it's THAT simple.

Pitts: Start a game of 'Bunny'. Tell the kids there life depends on winning. _(BUNNY!BUNNY!BUNNY!BUNNY!BUNNY!BUNNY! CLAP!)_

**A.N. Okay, so yes...if you didn't get the Flight Of the Concords reference just search 'Albi The Racist Dragon' On Youtube or something. It's worth watching I promise.**

**And BUNNY! Omigod BEST theatre game ever to be played. I'm not going to explain it because that would be boring. But yes, fun fun times.**

**-C**

**P.s. Oh yes! I wanted to mention something I thought was uber groovy cool. Okay so according to the "original" Dead Poets Society book (The one that was a novelisation of the ORIGINAL script, NOT the movie novelisation) Todd has a younger sister. Isn't that crazy?! **

**Knox says:**

**Read!**

**Review!**

**MY PATELLA!! **


	39. DENIED!

**Disclaimer: I OWN IT ALL!! MWAHAHAHAHAHA. Oh...almost had you. **

**This is for the lovely Rhyme or Reason. Because she's just so fabbity-fab and double cool. (With knobs!)**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 38: DENIED!**

How To Reject Someone Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Just tell them your "Sexually Ambivalent", I swear it totally works.

Todd: Mumble something incoherent to your shoes and hide from them for the rest of your very, very long life.

Charlie: Charlie rejects no one. He just kisses them and walks away.

Knox: Act all cool and say "I'm with her." while pointing at Chris. (Who may or may not be making out with another guy.)

Cameron: _See the thing is you can't be rejected if you haven't been asked. You see my problem. _

Meeks: Say very nicely, "Thanks, but your not my type."

Pitts: Make up some long winded story about how your the lost heir to a small European country so, alas, your love can never be.

**A.N. I HAVE RETURNED! And just to clarify I haven't run off with a band of Swedish Roller Derby Stars. I have no idea how **_**that**_**rumor started. Anywho, y'all go review.**

**P.s. EVERYONE! GO READ 'COFFEE BREAKS' NOW! Okay, review first but then, hustle. (Ya, I just shamelessly indorced you fic, deal with it.)**

**Meeks Says:**

**Read.**

**Review.**

**CHARLIE! Stop that!**


	40. Fire In The Hole

**Disclaimer: Insert witty disclaimer here **

**For Kayla, because her antics are good inspiration.**

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 39: Fire In The Hole**

How To Start A Fire Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Get really drunk steal Meeks' lighter and 'accidentally' light your Puck crown on fire.

Todd: Get really drunk and 'accidentally' knock Neil's Puck crown into a highly flammable bush.

Charlie: Maybe making s'mores on the radiator wasn't such a good idea after all...

Knox: Throw Chris' nail polish into the tail pipe of your car. _(Though upon question he wasn't sure why he did it.)_

Cameron: _(Unfortunately as hard as Cameron tries he was unable to start a fire. Poor kid.)_

Meeks: You use kindling on the bottom and then add larger branches in a tepee shape farther up.

Pitts: Ya, microwave pizza was one and a half minutes not eleven and a half minutes.

**A.N. The microwave pizza thing, true story. I didn't so it though, I'm not that stupid. **

**-C**

**Pitts Says:**

**Read.**

**Review.**

**I AM THE WIZARD!**

**(Also, I don't look like Micheal Phelps.)**


	41. Thanksgivings the New Christmas

**Disclaimer: Insert witty disclaimer here **

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter **

How To Survive Thanksgiving Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Eat as fast as you can and spend the rest of the time hiding from your (Crazy) cousins who keep demanding where all your cute friends are.

Todd: Hide in the bathroom and practise what to say when everyone asks when your going to get hooked up after Jeff brings home his latest girlfriend.

Charlie: Convince Steven to come over for dinner. Hopefully no one will notice the whipped cream is missing.

Knox: Don't engage in the the pie eating contest no matter how cool you think it will make you look in front of Chris. It always ends bad. Bad I tell you!

Cameron: Use it as an opertunity to impress your parents business friends and there daughters. _(Uhhhhhh...sure)_

Meeks: Spend the afternoon trying to think of plausible reasons you could have bruises on your neck after 'playing Backgammon' with Charlie.

Pitts: While all the adults are making jokes about the Stalk Market build models of your friends out of mashed potatoes and make up very animated conversations for them. (In your head of course...)

**A.N. HAPPY BELATED CANADIAN THANKSGIVING! Yay, also 40 Chapters! Whoot!**

**Now for the not so fun stuff...okay, so oneshots are being put on hold right now because my being sick and all this personal stuff are really starting to take it's toll on my writing. I feel awful and it would be really nice if no one threatened me with bodily harm. I still will be updating on this about one or twice a week, so no one freak. I also wrote another 'rules' thingie which will be up sometime in the next few days.**

**XOXOXO**

**-Cloudy**


	42. BOO!

**Disclaimer: [Insert witty disclaimer here] **

**How To Live like a Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 41: BOO!**

How To Give Yourself Nightmares Like A Dead Poet

Neil: Medical text books. Those things are just gross.

Todd: Just tell yourself not to think about the Blue Unicorn and end up having nightmares about it.

Charlie: Two words. Naked Cameron.

Knox: Convince yourself to watch a Horror Movie, (even though your scared) to prove how butch you are.

Cameron: Listen to your taped notes of Hagar's classes while your falling asleep.

Meeks: You know you can't really _give_yourself nightmares since all dreams are a work of the sub-conscience.

Pitts: Eat a whole peacan pie and fall asleep watching Moulin Rouge.

**A.N. I AM SO SORRY! My Documents feature has been broken and it just started working about 15 minutes ago. I have like...3 more of these I need to track down and 2 for 10 Things so just hold tight Duckies.**

**-C**

**P.s. Yes, Pitts also likes Moulin Rouge now because I say so.**


	43. You Are Bonkers

**Disclaimer: Don't own, won't own, has never owned.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 42: Bonkers**

How To Drive Someone Completely Crazy Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Respond to people only in Shakespearian or poetic metre.

Todd: Mumble quieter and quiter everytime someone asks you to speak up.

Charlie: Acknowledge them only by embarrasing pet names like, Pookie, Cupcake, Angelface, Pum'kin, ect.

Knox: Make a long list on all the words that rhyme with 'Chris', insist on reading it outloud.

Cameron: Be yourself!

Meeks: Withhold all physical contact until a certain person (who shall remain nameless) stops with the pet names.

Pitts: Take something from them and hold it hostage above your head and say repeatedly "Come on, jump for it!".

**A.N. MY COMPUTER SHE LIVES! I know, I know, I disapeared for a mouth but it was completely my computers fault I swear! So now that I've updated you all have to forgive me and review. See how that works? Good.**

**-C**


	44. Happy Festivus

**Disclaimer: Don't own, won't own, has never owned.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 43: Happy Festivus**

How To **Not **Go Completely Broke Buying Christmas/Festivus/Solstice/New Years/Kwanzaa/ Hanukkah Presents:

Neil: Spend a large majority of your Holiday money on stuff for yourself and end up just getting everyone elf shaped chocolate.

Todd: Buy everyone the exact same thing in various different colours and just let everyone argue over who gets the 'manly' purple one.

Charlie: Forget presents, instead give the gift of a good shag.

Knox: Save money buy not buying 'fancy' wrapping paper and just give them their presents. wrapping paper's stupid anyways.

Cameron: Presents? Who said you were buying anyone presents?

Meeks: It's called a 'budget'. Ever heard of one?

Pitts: Make everyone homemade socks but deny you know how to knit...because you don't....(shifty eyes).

**A.N. How come we don't have any Winter-y holiday fics? Get on that people! Oh! But please review first.**

**Pssst: Kayla....Garage sale...that's all I have to say.**

**-C**


	45. Chores

**Disclaimer: You know what? I'm sick of writing these see Chapters 1-43 for disclaimer.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 44: Chores**

How To Get Out Of Doing Chores Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Say you were just going off to do your chores -really, truly you were- but you accidentally got locked in the storage closet when you went looking for the mop.

Todd: Claim you were with Neil when he got locked in. (This may or may not _actually_ be a lie.)

Charlie: Pay the 1st years to do them. What? It's what they're there for isn't it?

Knox: Annoy your friends endlessly about Chris until they give in and do your chores for you (this works great even if your _not _trying to get them done.)

Cameron: Pick something that doesn't actually _need_ to be done and then just say you've already done it.

Meeks: Actually do your chores and then go yell at everyone else who isn't doing theirs.

Pitts: Why wouldn't you do your chores? Without them you have no reason to sing the 'clean-up song'.

**A.N. So, yes not dead after all. I know more closet jokes, I'm immature yadda, yadda...Also very unoriginal chapter title on my behalf.**

**Anyone who actually KNOWS the clean-up song will win a bag full of green M&M's**

**-C**

**Anyone who reviews gets to go into the closet with Neil and Todd. Hehehehe.**


	46. Bond, James Bond

**Disclaimer: You know what? I'm sick of writing these see Chapters 1-44 for disclaimer. (I also do not own 'James Bond' just in case you were wondering.)**

**So this is a modification on the Stalking idea given to me by Rhyme, very many thanks to her who now has to update. (HA!)**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 45: Bond, James Bond.**

How To Spy On Someone Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Cut out the eye holes from a newspaper and place yourself strategically in front of your victim.

Todd: Wear a shirt the same colour as the wallpaper and just blend in. It's what your good at.

Charlie: Lurk after Meeks in a tuxedo in an attempt to live out your 'James Bond' fantasies

Knox: Take your manly pink bike down to their school, but make sure to wear a disguise of tacky plaid shirt and sunglasses.

Cameron: Hide behind shelves in the library so you can rat out people who aren't working.

Meeks: Use a compact mirror to spy behind you. (Or to fix your hair.)

Pitts: Dressed all in black crawl through the ventilation until your above their room. Then employ high tech listen devices to eavesdrop when Steven kicks you out so he can "talk" privately with Charlie.

**A.N. Poor Todd, he's so adorably sad. Lets all make him pancakes. **

**-C**

**Review please!**


	47. It's Not Me It's You

**Disclaimer: (Checks IMDB) Nope, still don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 46: It's Not Me It's You**

How To Break Up With Someone Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Explain how your really like Romeo and Juliet. Had they lived they would have broken up and got their seperate ways. Right?

Todd: Leave a message,with their mother that your sorry but it's not working. Then hide.

Charlie: Say: "It's nothing personal, I can just do better than you. That's all."

Knox: Tell them it's time to move on and start stalking someone new.

Cameron: Just start ignoring them. They'll get the hint eventually.

Meeks: "It's not you. It's me...well maybe it was sort of you. But mostly me. Ummm...sorry."

Pitts: Send them a cake that says "I think were better off as friends!"

**A.N. So, I was at this play with my school yesterday and there was this guy who looked SOOOO much like Pitts. He played the mum, a janitor, a guy who worked at McDonald's, a librarian, a back-up dancer, and a tree who could sing but not dance. My random DPS moment of the week.**

**-C**

**Anyone who reviews gets a piece of Pitts' break-up cake! **


	48. Bankrupt!

**Disclaimer: (Checks IMDB) Nope, still don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 47: Bankrupt!**

How To Win At Monopoly Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Be the banker so you can steal money when no one's looking. _(Who __**hasn't **__done this? Seriously.)_

Todd: Be extremely lucky and just not hit anyone of the high paying squares and only get good chance cards.

Charlie: All you have to do is convince Meeks to sell you his properties. Easy.

Knox: Be persistant and win by defult when everyone else wants to go to bed.

Cameron: Make up rules every five minutes so you get free money and more turns and so everyone else has to pay more.

Meeks: Buy the dark blue squares and put all over your money into hotels.

Pitts: Make SURE you get the car. You will win if you get the car.

**A.N. I have NO idea where this came from. **

**-C**

**If you review you can play monopoly with the Poets....any takers?**


	49. Glitterglue

**Disclaimer: (Checks IMDB) Nope, still don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 48: Glitterglue**

How To Pass Art Class Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: When you mess up on anything simply tell them "It's a comment on society..."

Todd: Draw a circle and write a paper convincing your teacher it's really a very complex piece filled with emotion and meaning.

Charlie: Convince people to let you draw them nude for _completely_ artist reasons.

Knox: Put lots of glitter on everything, it's gotta count for something.

Cameron: Trace drawings out of books, not like they'll ever check.

Meeks: Make up your crappy application grade by writing a very inspiring term paper on horizontal lines.

Pitts: Draw your friends in drag because it's hard to draw boys.

**A.N. Because I CANNOT draw/paint/sculpt to save my life and that's all they seem to want us to do in art class. *Sigh*. **

**-C**

**P.s. 2 updates in less than 24 hours, I am good.**

**Review pretty please with sprinkles on top.**


	50. Til Death Do You Part

**Disclaimer: (Checks IMDB) Nope, still don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 49: 'Til Death Do You Part**

How To Have Fun At A Wedding Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Steal pieces of cake and hide them in your bag for later.

Todd: Try and find Neil and end up getting stuck at the Crazy-Old-Aunt table.

Charlie: Swipe one of those bells that when rung couples have to kiss. Ring it at everyone, especially Meeks.

Knox: Get really drunk and end up telling Meeks you have a friend who looks just like him.

Cameron: Very stealthily steal wedding gifts. Because you've always wanted a cappichino machine.

Meeks: Get Neil and Cameron to put back the cake and gifts, rescue Todd, avoid Charlie, help a very smashed Knox get home and get out of dancing with Pitts...basically watch out for everyone else.

Pitts: Make sure you get everyone doing The Electric Slide and YMCA and possibly the Time Warp.

**A.N. Don't worry Todd, Neil'll save you after he's done stealing cake. Also Pitts' isn't periodically correct...Whatever.**

**-C**

**Review, please and thank you.**


	51. Cinnamon Hearts

**Disclaimer: (Checks IMDB) Nope, still don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**HAPPY BIRTHDAY RHYME! I know you wanted our section to get some Valentines day fic. Also you get Chapter 50, so that's pretty damn special.**

**Chapter 50: Cinnamon Hearts**

How To Celebrate Valentines Day Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Spend three weeks making Todd the best Valentines card ever only to leave it on the radiator. Who knew glitter was so flammable?

Todd: Completely forget was Valentines Day until 2 days later. Thoroughly 'apologize' to Neil for forgetting.

Charlie: Make everyone dirty Valentines, sign them 'N' for Nuwanda causing people to think they're from Neil.

Knox: Hang out in your room, alone moping and eating cinnamon hearts until your tongue bleeds.

Cameron: Send yourself flowers and candy from your "Girlfriend".

Meeks: Spend the day trying to figure out what you could have possibly said to make Charlie think it was your heart's desire to receive a Purple Unicorn Stuffy for Valentines day.

Pitts: Get excited for Easter! It's only two months away!

**A.N. OHMIGOSH!!!! Chapter 50! Can you guys believe it?! I know I can't, much, much love to you guys for your support and inspiration. As well if I owe you a chapter you requested; they ARE coming, so just be patient with my fickle muses. Okay enough with the sap, go review you lovely people.**

**-C**


	52. Sparkly Spandex Bodysuit

**Disclaimer: (Checks IMDB) Nope, still don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 51: Sparkly Spandex Bodysuit**

How To Skate Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Rough around with Todd and race around like a maniac until you realise you don't know how to stop.

Todd: Have fun horsing around until Neil decides to crashing into you will help him stop.

Charlie: Trip Cameron with a hockey stick and refuse to wear a helmet because it'll mess up your hair.

Knox: Wipe out horribly and end up with bloody nose...before you even put your skates on.

Cameron: Show off your 6 years of extensive figure skating training complete with sparkly spandex body suit.

Meeks: Cling to the boards helpless because you never learned how to skate. How logical is strapping shoes with blades on them to your feet and attempting to glide over a sheet of ice anyways?!

Pitts: Eat poutine, attempt to flirt with girls and swear you don't know any of them.

**A.N. Uhhh, right so yes....based on a conversation/epic DPS rant with Haykatsi. Also Kayla because she can't stop (or turn).**

**-C**

**Review, it's good Karma. (Don't and DIE!)**


	53. Did It Hurt?

**Disclaimer: (Checks IMDB) Nope, still don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 52: Did It Hurt?**

How To Flirt Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: KICK'EM IN THE SHIIIINNNS!

Todd: Go up to them make an attempt to make a sound, ANY sound, come out of your mouth before running away.

Charlie: Every _single_ thing Charlie Dalton does is flirting.

Knox: Memorize cheesy pick-up lines. Because Charlie says girls _love_ that sort of thing.

Cameron: Recite 'Shall I Compare Thee to a Summer's Day'. Forget to leave out the parts where you call her a boy.

Meeks: Come up with something clever and romantic to say in Latin only to discover they have absolutely no clue what your saying.

Pitts: Offer them the other half of your roll.

**A.N. Neil needs some explanation...okay, so we all know Neil sort of...fails, for lack of a better term at romance. In his mind kicking someone is flirting, or maybe just REALLY violent footsies. **

**-C**

**Review now and receive a FREE Todd Anderson action figure with Desk-set throwing ACTION! **


	54. Feel The Burn

**Disclaimer: If you can read this your smart enough to know I don't own.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 53: Feel The Burn**

How To Pass Gym Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Just jump on whoever has the ball. This is a fairly good tactic for almost any sport.

Todd: Avoid being jumped on...whether or not you actually have the ball.

Charlie: Take 3 or 4 sports on the side, so you can make up for missing all of your gym due to being 'stuck' in the changing room with Meeks.

Knox: Get an _actual_ doctor's note saying that you playing any form of sports would be a danger to you and the people around you.

Cameron: Complain of "guy" cramps. If girls can get away with it so should you!

Meeks: Offer to keep score for baseball only to realise your more likely to get hit by the ball then if you were on the field.

Pitts: Run in the opposite direction of everyone else, just to prove your not a lemming.

**A.N. Happy early pi day!**

**....Oh god, I'm such a dork....**

**-C**

**Review and you can have some bench time with Dead Poet Initiate of your choice.**


	55. Back In My Day

**Disclaimer: If you can read this your smart enough to know I don't own.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 54: Back In My Day...**

How To Have A Mid-Life Crisis Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Cut off all your hair in a desperate attempt to not look like your losing your hair._(1)_

Todd: Try and grow out your hair to look younger, end up looking like a hobo.

Charlie: Go completely insane. Get a tattoo of Whitman, go naked skydiving, and trash a hotel room to prove you "still got it".

Knox: Make a drastic career change, from lawyer to C.I.A-astronaut-cowboy-ninja. Or attempt to anyways.

Cameron: Try and "relate" to young people. Fo' shizzle homeskillet. Word.

Meeks: Get a shiny sports car with a vanity plate miss-spelled so it says 'Neeks'.

Pitts: Start lying about your age. Not like anyone is going to notice you've been 38 for 4 years now.

**A.N. Awww, crazy middle-aged Poets. Even though most of them would probably do this stuff middle aged or not (**_**cough **_**Neil**_** cough).**_**Dear lord, RSL is OLD. He shouldn't shave his head though, his Wilson hair is finally cute again. I don't even wanna think about how old Gale Hansen is....**

**I am doing NOTHING all March break, whoopee. I predict updates.**

**-C**

_**(1)**_**-I've never gotten why people do this. I mean you cut off your hair to look like your not going bald....What? You can still tell where it's not growing back and it just looks, well, stupid.**


	56. Take It Like A Man

**Disclaimer: If you can read this your smart enough to know I don't own.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 55: Take It Like A Man**

How To Buy Clothes Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Buy the first things that fit. Who cares if the pants are a few inches too short?

Todd: Get trapped at the makeup counter on your way to the mens section by those scary perfume spraying ladies.

Charlie: Flirt with the sales assistants and end up getting 25% off a leopard print speedo.

Knox: Let the sales ladies talk you into _way_ too much stuff. Can you help it if green is your colour?

Cameron: Find a great sweater only to realise the girl at the check-out is wearing the exact same one.

Meeks: Stand _very_still while they take your measurement and still end up getting pricked more than logical to.

Pitts: Try on anything and everything you like, you never know when you might need a pair of suspenders.

**A.N. Now if only someone **_**else**_** would update. (**_**wink, wink, nudge, nudge.**_**)**

**-C**

**P.S. Anyone who gets the chapter title reference will win a secret prize. **

**Review...Or I'll send the death cat after you! Meow.**


	57. Lets All get Drunk

**Disclaimer: If you can read this your smart enough to know I don't own.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 56: Let's All Get Drunk and Celebrate Our Heritage**

How To Celebrate St. Patrick's Day Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Run around singing 'O Danny Boy' and speaking with an Irish accent.

Todd: Get stuck with a ridiculous green hat because Neil thinks it's 'cute'.

Charlie: Spend the day trying to convince Meeks to go drinking with you as 'a tribute to his Irish heritage.'

Knox: Go around pinching everyone who's not wearing green, never-mind the fact your uniforms are black and red.

Cameron: Get drunk under the table with wine coolers.

Meeks: Try and tell people repeatedly that just because you have red hair and freckles does not mean your Irish. In fact your Welsh.

Pitts: Eat lots of green food. Find out the next day your allergic to green food colouring.

**A.N. Yes, I gave in and did a St. Patty's day one. I went to the parade this morning and actually got pinched by a total stranger, even though I was wearing a green hat. Maybe he was colour blind.**

**-C**

**Review or I'll get Knox to pinch you! You know I would.**


	58. 2 Pencils Only

**Disclaimer: If you can read this your smart enough to know I don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 57: #2 Pencils Only**

How To Pass A Test Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Make up a song to help you remember the information. Sing it under your breath during the test.

Todd: Study like crazy before and just focus on not passing out or hyperventilating during the actual test.

Charlie: Write answers on every avaliable inch of skin under your uniform. Ignore everyone in the shower when they ask why you have '_The Boston Tea-Party'_ written on your chest.

Knox: Answer D to every multiple choice question. It's _always_ D.

Cameron: Happen to see the test and memorize the answe-I mean study. Yes, of course, you would _never_ cheat.

Meeks: Spend breakfast frantically going over your notes, even after spending all week 'studying' with Charlie.

Pitts: When all else fails just make up stuff for the essay section. Such as 'The Great Ecuadorain Tortoise Blight of 1928', proving the Great Depression was caused by sea turtles.

**A.N. The moral of the story is; tests suck. I used to get to stay home for some when I was younger because my dad was so opposed to standarized testing. Also, don't try cheating like Charlie, and if you do don't blame it on me. I warned you.**

**-C**

**If Walt Whitman was alive he'd tell you to review. **


	59. A Cat Sat On A Mat

**Disclaimer: If you can read this your smart enough to know I don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 58: **A Cat Sat on a Mat

How To Write a Poem Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Whenever you get stuck just start making up words. It worked for Dr. Seuss.

Todd: Lock yourself in your room for 3 days with no food or water and come out with a masterpiece.

Charlie: Attempt to write a deep and moving piece but get distracted and start writing dirty limericks.

Knox: Start an ode to Chris. Realise later that since you talk about her hair and eyes so much it sort of sounds like it's about Todd.

Cameron: Look up some obscure poem and just change enough words that it seems like your own.

Meeks: Write a _really_ simplistic poem and translate it into Latin, it makes everything sound profound.

Pitts: Wake up in the middle of the night and write down whatever pops into your head. Who cares if it's total gibberish

**A.N. I think it's a tad ironic I haven't done this yet considering it is Dead POETS Society. Some stuff from the Epic Rant.**

**-C**

**Violets are Blue**

**Roses are Red**

**Review Pretty Please**

**Or I'll Kick in Your Head.**


	60. Hairspray

**Disclaimer: If you can read this your smart enough to know I don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 59: Is it Charm? Is It Poise? No, It's Hairspray!**

How To Do Your Hair Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Try and blow dry your hair in the bathroom and end up starting a small electrical fire. Because Neil, water, and a hair dryer is not a good combination.

Todd: Uh, wash it, dry it, comb it?

Charlie: The secret to the slightly tussled sexy hair? Charlie sleeps in curlers.

Knox: Due to a very unfortunate incident which involved ironing your hair it's actually a wig now.

Cameron: Order crates and crates of shampoo, no way are _you_ washing your hair with _soap_.

Meeks: Secretly have one of those weird salon dryers in your closet because if you don't use one it goes all frizzy.

Pitts: Use mousse to hold volume only to find out weeks later it's actually shaving cream.

**A.N. So, yes. Not dead after all. Just temporary brain-melt. I know this is super late BUT it is Chapter 59, which you must admit is pretty cool. **

**-C**

**You know the drill. Review. Make me happy so I won't kill you.**


	61. Tell Me About Yourself

**Disclaimer: If you can read this your smart enough to know I don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 60: Tell Me About Yourself**

How To Get Hired Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Show up. Introduce yourself. Get hired.

Todd: Pick a job where you'll only have to fill out a resume with no interview. That way you won't even have to attempt to make coherent sentences. Writing is your strong point, not talking.

Charlie: Seduce the person conducting the interview, this is a bad idea however if you're getting into get into the family business.

Knox: Make sure to leave things out of your resume such as; 'I have a tendency scream at people for no reason'.

Cameron: Just repeatedly tell them, who your father is. Really they shouldn't need to know anything more.

Meeks: Completely freak out the person interviewing you by going off on an hour long tangent in techo-babble, just to prove how qualified you are.

Pitts: When listing your strengths and qualifications add things like; ninja-in-training, wizard-D.J., sewing machine skills, licensed to kill, also a good team-player.

**A.N. We had a snow day today, IN APRIL! It's just ridiculous...**

**Much thanks to Haykatsi, what would I do without you?**

**-C**

**You know the drill. Review. Make me happy so I won't kill you.**


	62. What is Your Greatest Weakness?

**Disclaimer: If you can read this your smart enough to know I don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 61: What Is your Greatest Weakness?**

How To Get Fired Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Repeatedly wear your full Puck costume into work.

Todd: Sort of get forgotten about and one day just stop getting paid.

Charlie: Get caught doing naughty things on your boss' desk. Several times actually.

Knox: Trip at the annual company picnic and grab the closest thing for support. Also known as your boss' daughter's chest.

Cameron: They'll learn soon enough no matter who your father is your still a pompous arrogant asshole.

Meeks: Get caught stealing electronics for your illegal radio. Erm....Science project.

Pitts: It really all went downhill when they found out you were lying about being able to speak fluent Dutch.

**A.N. I'm in a really weird post-DPS watching mood right now...I think I'll go read some happy fic to cheer me up. Anyways, review please.**

**-C**


	63. Baggage Claim

**Disclaimer: If you can read this your smart enough to know I don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 62: Baggage Claim**

How To Fly Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Spend the entire flight being fascinated by the free ginger ale and the complimentary air sickness bag.

Todd: Get stuck behind that one rude jerk who thinks it's appropriote to put his chair all the way down and practically have their head in you lap.

Charlie: Become so nervous that you don't even flirt with the flight attendants because your convinced the plane isn't safe and your going plummet to your death.

Knox: Accidently get locked in the bathroom and really piss off alot of people.

Cameron: Beg the flight attendants to move you into 1st class. You can't be stuck in _coach_.

Meeks: Sneak into the cabin and start bugging the pilot with questions about the radios. Ask if you can have one.

Pitts: Get asked to help do the safety demonstration. Get stuck in the life jacket and have to wear it for the rest of the flight.

**A.N. So, apparently I'm going to Chicago tommorow....see you guys on Monday. Stuff from the Epic Rant. **

**-C**

**People who don't review are the real cause of global warming. **


	64. Room Service

**Disclaimer: If you can read this your smart enough to know I don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 63: Room Service**

How To Entertain Yourself In A Hotel Room Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Play 'The Floor Is Made of Lava' with Todd. Or rather drag Todd along as you jump around the room.

Todd: In an act of defiance refuse to get off the floor, er, 'lava'.

Charlie: Order crazy amounts of room service and change it all to Cameron.

Knox: Watch cartoons and be confused by all the weird new kids shows and reminisce about the good old days of 'The Magic School Bus'.

Cameron: Call the front desk and complain that you didn't get any mints on your pillow.

Meeks: Try and figure out why there's a ironing board in the closet but no iron. One of the many mystery's of life.

Pitts: Ride the elevator for hours at a time and strike up conversations with the people riding with you. Name the elevator Otis while your at it.

**A.N. Meeks is like Arnold from Magic School Bus's long lost twin. Actually written in a hotel room while being bored. I guess that's sort of a bonus one....**

**-C**

**People who don't review are the real cause of global warming. **


	65. Marco Polo

**Disclaimer: If you can read this your smart enough to know I don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 64: Marco Polo**

How To Swim Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Insist on having water wings even thought your perfectly capable of swimming on your own.

Todd: Get sent out of the pool because you got caught the _one_ time you splashed back at Neil.

Charlie: Start a game of 'Marco Polo' which quickly turns into a game of 'Corner Meeks Against The Pool Wall'.

Knox: Try and show off by diving into the pool. In the shallow end.

Cameron: Sink to the bottom because your so skinny you have no buoyancy. Wait for someone to notice.

Meeks: Avoid getting forced into playing 'Chicken' and having Charlie sit on your shoulders.

Pitts: Spend the entire time trying to get everyone to watch you do an underwater handstand.

**A.N. Their was this kid in the pool today who totally reminded me of Charlie, only he was, like, seven-years-old.**

**-C**


	66. Hic

**Disclaimer: If you can read this your smart enough to know I don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 65: Hic**

How To Get Rid Of Hiccups Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Try and keep them going so your can break a world record.

Todd: Eat raw sugar. If it doesn't work, oh well.

Charlie: Have sex, it cures everything. Everything.

Knox: Hold your breath for as long as you can and pass out from lack of oxygen

Cameron: Buy some fancy hiccup remedy which turns out to just be water with blue food colouring.

Meeks: Try and remind yourself it's just your larynx vibrating. Mutter it over and over until it just turns into 'Larynx, larynx, larynx...'.

Pitts: Stand on your head while drinking Fresca. Even if you don't have the hiccups.

**A.N. I had the hiccups for 45 minutes today, not fun people, not fun.**

**-C**


	67. There's The Door

**Disclaimer: If you can read this your smart enough to know I don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 65: There's The Door**

How To Get People Out Of Your House Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Two words. Interpretive dance.

Todd: Mumble every couple of minutes they should probably leave in half an hour, or an hour, or never mind; whenever they like.

Charlie: Start to explain in great detail the various sexual situations you have gotten into in different areas of your house.

Knox: Read badly written sappy love poetry until they leave.

Cameron: Stand by your front door, hold it open, and clear your throat loudly until they get the message.

Meeks: Start reading a book or something while ignoring them to clearly indicate they should leave.

Pitts: Try and start a conga line going out your front door.

**A.N. Oh Charlie, I feel for most of these I could just write 'Have sex' after all of his and it would make perfect sense, but how creative would that be? **

**-C**


	68. Into The Woods

**Disclaimer: If you can read this your smart enough to know I don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 67: Into The Woods**

How To Go Camping Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Get completely and utterly lost for 2 days because you refused to look at the map.

Todd: Build a huge and very impressive bonfire only to have it start raining as soon as your finished.

Charlie: Spend most of your time trying to convince people to go skinny dipping in the lake and eventually resort to pushing and/or throwing people off the docks.

Knox: Try and start a game of 'Worm Wrestling' and end up falling into poison oak. Before you've even started.

Cameron: Get smacked in the head with a canoe paddle and end up having to go home early. (Not that anyone was complaining.)

Meeks: Fortunately you brought lots of batteries in case your flashlight died, unfortunately you forgot the flashlight.

Pitts: End up sleeping on top of a rock, get poison ivy, fall out of the canoe, get stuck in a thunderstorm after the tent collapsed and _still_ manage to have the time of your life.

**A.N. For those of you who don't know 'Worm Wrestling' is when you climb into a sleeping bag and stand upright trying to push over another person who's doing the same thing. It's really fun. **

**-C**


	69. Another Year Older

**Disclaimer: If you can read this your smart enough to know I don't own. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 68: Another Year Older...**

How To Celebrate Your Birthday Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Throw a party with lots of food, confetti, and possibly a bouncy castle.

Todd: Throw things off buildings. Duh. _(WHOOSH!)_

Charlie: Say and do what ever the hell you want. Wait hold on, you do that everyday.

Knox: Mention your birthday's coming up soon for at least a week beforehand, then become paranoid on the day when everyone knows it's your birthday.

Cameron: Preach all year about how ridiculous birthdays are then get all pissed off when no one does anything for you.

Meeks: Practise looking shocked for the 'surprise' party you figured out you were being thrown 4 months ago.

Pitts: Go to a restaurant and demand a song and/or strange looking headgear to celebrate the momentous day of you birth. Or free ice cream is good too.

**A.N. HAPPY BIRTHDAY NEIL AND SHAKESPEARE! Want to know something disturbing. If Neil was a real person (what!? He's not!?) and hadn't...well, you know, he'd be 66 today. That's creepy. He'll always be sixteen to me though. **

**-C**


	70. 99 Bottles

**Disclaimer: Roses are Red, **

**Violets are Blue, **

**I don't own DPS, **

**But neither do You.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 69: 99 Bottles**

How To Go On A Class Trip Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Try and start rousing camp songs at 6 in the morning. End up getting locked in the bus bathroom.

Todd: Spend a whole hour looking at a piece of 'art' which ends up just being the reception desk.

Charlie: Watch a very "educational" movie, which ends up showing some very detailed fish sex. Buy a copy in the gift shop.

Knox: Eat insane amounts of junk food on the bus ride and end up curled up on the hotel bathroom floor for the rest of the trip.

Cameron: Go to a very interesting and eclectic market for lunch and end up buying McDonalds', which you can buy anywhere.

Meeks: Keep reminding yourself on the haunted walk there's no scientific proof ghosts exist. Stand extra close Charlie just to be on the safe side.

Pitts: Take pictures of absolutely _everything_ and run out of film before your even on the bus.

**A.N. I'M BAAAACK! I missed you all very much, but I had a lot of fun. I got a really cool bracelet that says 'Cloudy'. The guy looked at me funny when I told him that was my name, but it was worth it. **

**-C**


	71. Initial Here

**Disclaimer: Roses are Red, **

**Violets are Blue, **

**I don't own DPS, **

**But neither do You.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 70: Initial Here**

How To Sign Something Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Press so hard, and write so enthusiastically you end up tearing the paper.

Todd: End up with a pen which doesn't work so you can't actually sign anything.

Charlie: Sign your name alright, but not _on the line provided!_ Ha! Take that conformity!

Knox: Plan on adding hearts over the I's in your name only to be disappointed when you realise there aren't any.

Cameron: Sign it, but not before reading it thoroughly and pointing out any mistakes in the document.

Meeks: Spell it wrong to just to make everyone wonder how a genius misspelled his own name. Really it's all just mind games.

Pitts: Start with a curly underline, and a smily face, and a puppy, and a monkey driving a speedboat, and a sloth, and....wait what were you doing again?

**A.N. If you look close at the confession thingy Pitts HAS actually done a curly underline under his name. But SERIOUSLY what's with the 'Stephen' thing on the confession. **

**-C**


	72. Violence Is Never Wise

**Disclaimer: Roses are Red, **

**Violets are Blue, **

**I don't own DPS, **

**But neither do You.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 71: Violence Is Never Wise**

How To Beat Up Someone Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Use your serious lack of ass-paddage to your advantage and sit on them.

Todd: Take advantage of the element of surprise and slam them into a wall. _No one_ ever expects it.

Charlie: The good old fashioned way. Face meets fist.

Knox: Take your face to hurt their hand. It was your plan from the beginning. Seriously.

Cameron: Just happen to put your foot out while their trying to walk down the stairs. Not that you'd ever do this of course.

Meeks: Try and argue with logic and reason to avoid and physical contact. Or you could just throw a Latin book at them while their not paying attention.

Pitts: Put on your cape, spandex bodysuit, mask and use your radio to beat them in the name of justice! Or because they said Marconi invented the radio.

**A.N. Okay I missed How To's birthday...it was on Monday. My baby's growing up! Is anyone still around from 'way back then'? So instead of something birthday themed (which I did like 2 posts ago, bad planning I tell you) I did something (mildly) violent. Yay! Violence!**

**-C**

**Review or I'll send the Poets after you! **


	73. The Doctor Will See You Now

**Disclaimer: Roses are Red, **

**Violets are Blue, **

**I don't own DPS, **

**But neither do You.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 72: The Doctor Will See You Now**

How To Pass Time In A Doctors Office Waiting Room Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Start playing with all the cool toys they have and refuse to leave to see the doctor.

Todd: Read symptoms on posters for different health conditions and become increasingly paranoid you have at least 3.

Charlie: Flirt with the secretary to try and score free lollipops.

Knox: See how high a tower you can make with all the back issue magazines they have.

Cameron: Practise everything your going to say so the doctor will be impressed and put a recommendation on your college resume.

Meeks: Try and keep everyone else from freaking out every other patient in the waiting room.

Pitts: Make up a song using all the different prescription drugs their recommending. _Zoloft and Paxil and Buspar and Xanex, Ambien, Prozac...._

**A.N. Don't ask me where this came from, it was like 11 p.m. when I started this. Pitts' song is stolen lyrics from 'Next to Normal' which I also do not own. Brian Yorkley does. **

**-C**


	74. One, Two, Three, One, Two, Three

**Disclaimer: Roses are Red, **

**Violets are Blue, **

**I don't own DPS, **

**But neither do You.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 73: One, Two, Three, One, Two, Three**

How To Act At Prom Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Practice your speech for when you're named Prom King. I mean really, who else would it be?

Todd: Lurk in the shadows and avoid dancing at all costs.

Charlie: Rent a limo and be severely disappointed when you don't get to drive it. I mean what's the fun in that?

Knox: Accidentally break her big toe during the first slow dance and spend the rest of the night at the emergency room.

Cameron: Make the mistake of buying a pin on corsage; which leads to accidental groppage which leads to being slapped.

Meeks: Grumble about how illogical it was to buy tickets and dress up if all your going to do is drive around with Charlie yelling '**I'M KING OF THE WORLD!**' through the sunroof.

Pitts: Spill red punch all down your white shirt two minutes into the dance. Take it off in the bathroom and hope no one notices there's nothing under your jacket.

**A.N. Oh god, Dead Poets in Tuxes...**

**-C**


	75. Lab Rats

**Disclaimer: Roses are Red, **

**Violets are Blue, **

**I don't own DPS, **

**But neither do You.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 74: Lab Rats**

How To Pass Science Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Just start throwing everything into a beaker and hope you don't blow up the lab this time.

Todd: Write a poem about about how the periodic table makes you feel.

Charlie: Five words; baking soda and vinegar volcano.

Knox: Dress up in a lab coat in an attempt to look more 'science-y'.

Cameron: Suck up to the teacher and cheat off Spaz if your really have to.

Meeks: Wave the antenna around. Instant A++

Pitts: Practise making beeping noises to prove your radio is _actually_ a radar.

**A.N. Ho hum, another of my 'How to pass' ones. I think I'd hate science less if the Poets were in my class though. **

**-C**


	76. ROOOAD TRIP!

**Disclaimer: Roses are Red, **

**Violets are Blue, **

**I don't own DPS, **

**But neither do You.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 75: ROOOAD TRIP!**

How To Go On A Road Trip Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Play I-Spy until your eyes start to bleed. Seriously.

Todd: Sit in the front, all windows down, wearing those strange bracelet things, and chugging Pepto Bismol because you get motion sickness.

Charlie: Try and fix your hair while driving and almost drive off a bridge....multiple times.

Knox: Freak out and make sure everyone's feet are off the floor while going over railroad tracks and everyone's holding their breath whenever you pass a graveyard.

Cameron: Get stuck in the trunk area so no one has to deal with you.

Meeks: Realise too late your no very good at navigating and keep getting lost because the map you were given is of Middle Earth.

Pitts: Start a rating system of all the pie you've eaten at every rest stop and diner along the way. Measured in 'Pitts Points' of course.

**A.N. I really like this one. I think it's completely and totally something the boys would do. Also who doesn't love a good old fashioned road trip? **

**-C**

**Anyone who reviews automatically gets 500 000 Pitts Points. **


	77. Did Not! Did Too!

**Disclaimer: Roses are Red, **

**Violets are Blue, **

**I don't own DPS, **

**But neither do You.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 76: Did not! Did too!**

How To Win An Argument Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Just keep repeating your original argument increasing in volume each time.

Todd: Look so sad and adorably pathetic your challenger will have no choice but to admit defeat.

Charlie: Be Charlie Dalton....really do you need to do anything else?

Knox: Start bringing out lots of fancy Latin lawyer terminology to make it _sound_ like you have a strong point.

Cameron: When you realise your losing bring out the 'Do you know who my father is?!' argument.

Meeks: Using cunning logic, wit, and an impressive vocabulary verbally beat the crap out of your opponent. They might even cry.

Pitts: Use exciting visuals of rocket ships and fast cars to get your point across, even if that really has nothing to do with the argument.

**A.N. Happy...Uh, Wednesday! **

**-C**


	78. STRIKE!

**Disclaimer: Roses are Red, **

**Violets are Blue, **

**I don't own DPS, **

**But neither do You.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 78: STRIKE!**

How To Go Bowling Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Take 15 minutes trying to find the 'best' ball out of dozens which are exactly the same. You know, except for the best one, which of _course_ is different.

Todd: Get a completely unexpected strike your first turn out and completely flub everything afterwards.

Charlie: Get in a fight with the manager because you refuse to have your name shortened to 'Char' on the scoreboard.

Knox: Score 245. Bowling granny style.

Cameron: Refuse to wear bowling shoes because there 'unhygenic'. Stand outside instead.

Meeks: Despite careful calculations of force and direction lose every single game.

Pitts: Try and re-wire the scoreboards so you get the cool strike animation even if you didn't get one.

**A.N. Happy Birthday Uncle Walt! Of course the Dead Poets would go bowling to celebrate their favourite Sweaty-Toothed Madman's special day. **

**-C**


	79. Everybody's Free To Wear Sunscreen

**Disclaimer: Roses are Red, **

**Violets are Blue, **

**I don't own DPS, **

**But neither do You.**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 78: Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)**

How To Deal With Sunburn Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Decide it was totally worth it since you used sunscreen to give yourself a message on your back. If only you could read it...

Todd: Completely over do it with the aloe vera gel and end up looking more green than red.

Charlie: Completely freak out and swear from this point on to wear buckets of sunscreen. You don't want to get _wrinkles _pre-maturely and look _old_.

Knox: Decide that falling asleep while attempting to get a tan is probably not the best way to look 'bronzed'.

Cameron: Completely don't notice until someone points out your face is the same colour as your hair.

Meeks: See, if you put sunscreen on _before _you won't get burnt. Some crazy idea about prevention being the best treatment.

Pitts: Get plain yogurt to rub on to help ease the pain. Decide you'd much rather eat the yogurt and just deal with the pain.

**A.N. Okay, here's my goal. Finish 100 chapters of this by my birthday (which is July 13th), 22 chapters, 41 days. Can I do it? I have no idea. ALSO, this chapter is chapter 78, the last one was a misprint...if anyone was actually noticed and/or cared. **

**-C**

**If anyone can guess what Neil's message says I'll um....well I'll do **_**something**_**.**


	80. Know When To Run

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 79: Know When To Run...**

How To Play Poker Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Decide halfway through that this is a stupid game and try and start a round of 'Go Fish' instead.

Todd: Win with a pair of two's because no one ever suspects the cute blond one's bluffing.

Charlie: Put all your energy into turning it into a game of strip poker. Because at the end of the day it doesn't make who wins and who loses; it's who you see naked that counts.

Knox: Wear sunglasses so your eyes won't give you away. Realise too late they're mirrored and everyone can see your cards.

Cameron: Count you money at the table just to piss everyone off.

Meeks: Go hoarse after the first two rounds yelling at Charlie that you _aren't _playing strip poker.

Pitts: Place all your bets in Pitts Points.

**A.N. I bet Todd'd be pissed cause I referred to him as 'The cute blond one'....**

**Also, special shout out to ****Mam'zelle Combeferre who said Neil's message was 'I love this story!', isn't that sweet?**

**-C**


	81. How Does Your Garden Grow?

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 80: How Does Your Garden Grow?**

How To Grow A Garden Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: After your 3rd failed attempt, decide to go with one of those unkillable zen rock gardens.

Todd: Begrudgingly let it become full of weeds because Neil got upset last time you tried to get rid of all the 'wish flowers'.

Charlie: Throw some seeds on the ground, water them, and hope for the best.

Knox: Become too scared of plants after Pitts made you watch 'Little Shop of Horrors' to ever attempt a garden.

Cameron: Buy some fake plants instead and try to play it off like you grew some amazing world class garden.

Meeks: Buy a cactus instead and claim your a man of science not a florist.

Pitts: Name all your plants and knit them pot warmers so they won't get cold.

**A.N. I fixed some of the spelling mistakes and missing words in the last chapter. Sorry about those. **

**-C**


	82. Fixer Upper

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 81: Fixer Upper**

How To Buy A House Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Buy the first one with a red door, just because you've _always_ wanted one.

Todd: Find your dream apartment only to discover it has a very lovely view of the parking lot.

Charlie: Ask if the walls are sound proofed. You know, since you'll be playing the sax...and other things.

Knox: Request to know if the furniture comes with the house or if you'll have to buy your own.

Cameron: Refuse to even get a full tour because one of the walls is painted green. Even though, of course, you could paint over it.

Meeks: Start throwing darts at the for sale ads. Really saves alot of headaches.

Pitts: Just double check to see if the house has any hidden passages or secret dungeons.

**A.N. Inspired by when I saw a house being sold by some guy named Neil Anderson yesterday. Much fangirly screaming in-sued. **

**-C**


	83. On Your Marks

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 82: On Your Marks**

How To Do Track & Field Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Become disappointed after you're disqualified from the 800M endurance run for tackling fellow runners. Who knew that wasn't allowed?

Todd: Run faster than you ever have before because your pretty sure if you slow down your going to end up on the ground.

Charlie: Refuse to use the 'girls' shot-put. You don't care if your under 5,10 you're using the manly one.

Knox: Ask if your wipe out during long jump still counts, since there was so much momentum you probably went farther than if you had just jumped.

Cameron: Add extra points to your score card when nobodies looking. Causing confusing when you got 10 points for the lunch break.

Meeks: Volunteer to keep score for the events so you won't have to worry about hurting yourself. Except for the bruises from the 2 off course shot-puts and being whacked in the back in the head with the high jump bar your completely pain free.

Pitts: Rank top for high jump, mostly because you can just step over the bar.

**A.N. I was in charge of the shot-put/ball throw at my school's Track & Field today. I think I'm more tired than I was last year actually doing all the events. **

**-C**


	84. Once Upon A Time

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 83: Once Upon A Time...**

How To Read A Book Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Attempt to jump around the room and read at the same time. Sitting down limits your mind.

Todd: Decide to climb a tree to sit in and read it. Only to discover once you got up there you forgot your book all the way down on the ground.

Charlie: Pull off the cover, are you really gonna judge a book by that? While your at it rip out the pages, just to be safe. Riiiiiiip.

Knox: Meh, who needs books. Watch the movie instead (Even though the movie is never as good, or so you've been told.).

Cameron: Tell everyone what happened in annoying detail and completely ruin the ending as soon as your done it.

Meeks: Lock yourself in your room for 4 hours straight so you can get your book done. You know if you put it down even once you'll never see it again.

Pitts: Read it backwards, just to be different.

**A.N. Ugh, sorry about not updating for a few days, I blame work and The Tony's.**

**-C**


	85. Bonjour

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 84: Bonjour**

How To Speak Another Language Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Start throwing random French sayings into your speech at inappropriate times just because it sounds cool, but hey, _c'est la vie_.

Todd: Just mumble along and throw in some _le's _and _la's_.

Charlie: Wear your beret constantly and start saying everything in a bad french accent. No one will know the difference.

Knox: Start watching all your favourite movies with the Spanish dub, that way you can be a movie dork in two languages.

Cameron: Memorize grammar rules, because nothing is a better conversation starter than variations of possession.

Meeks: Do something completely ridiculous, like, I don't know, taking a course in it.

Pitts: Claim that you already know Swedish. _Glor inte pa mine barmar_.

**A.N. My 4 year French education is finally useful. Also, please tell me I'm not the only one who's ever watched DPS with the dub. **

**-C**

**P.s. SUPER IMPORTANT! Tomorrow is DPS's 20th Birthday. **


	86. Oh The Places You'll Go

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 85: Oh The Places You'll Go**

How To Write A Valedictorian Speech Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Show up. Smile. Listen to everyone applaud your brilliance.

Todd: Refuse to do it, partially because Jeffery did it, and partially because it scares the hell out of you. (You mole.)

Charlie: Write the entire thing about 5 minutes before you have to go on stage and wing most of it. Completely make everyone regret choosing you.

Knox: Attempt to tell some funny stories about school but end up just laughing hysterically and barely get through it.

Cameron: Fill the entire thing with annoying cliches about how 'It's not the end, it's only the beginning!'.

Meeks: Realise too late _someone_ has replaced your cue cards with center-folds and pages of very detailed recounts of what you'll _really_ remember about school.

Pitts: Instead of 'Oh The Places You'll Go' quote Dr. Seuss's _true _masterpiece 'Green Eggs and Ham'. '_I do not like green eggs and ham. I do not like them Sam I am._' Real tear jerker.

**A.N. Happy birthday day to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday Dead Poets Society, happy birthday to you! **

**-C**


	87. XOXOX

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 86: XOXOX**

How To Sign A Yearbook Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Sign your name as big as possible, because the one who signed biggest loved them the most.

Todd: Become confused when you ask someone to sign your yearbook only to discover the entire back page is covered by Neil's name.

Charlie: Use your full title; Nuwanda: Sex God of Poets the One Only and Amazing formerly know as Count Rockula.

Knox: Purposely try and sign your name as not to be recognisable, that way you'll always be the mystery name in the yearbook.

Cameron: Remind everyone to keep the yearbook since your signature will be very valuable one day.

Meeks: Get so carried away with recalling the past you end up filling a good part of the page but forget to actually sign your name.

Pitts: Write jokes so inside only you, yourself, get them.

**A.N. How come the only good photo of me in the entire yearbook was taken like 2 minutes after I had been bawling? This makes no logical sense.**

**-C**


	88. What's Cookin' Good Lookin?

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 87: What's Cookin' Good Lookin'?**

How To Cook Dinner Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Throw everything you want to eat in a pan, put it in the oven, cross your fingers, and hope for the best. Or at least something marginally edible.

Todd: Get orange juice to drink and end up deciding you'd rather just have a litre of juice than an actual meal.

Charlie: Actually learn to cook for the sole purpose of wearing your 'Kiss The Cook' apron. And I mean _only_ the apron.

Knox: Find all the take-out menus so you won't have to actually cook. Now if only you could find the phone...

Cameron: Order someone else to do it for you so you won't have to admit you don't actually know how to turn on the stove.

Meeks: Make the one thing you ever actually learned to make. Hopefully everyone likes French Toast!

Pitts: Labor under the delusion that you're a fabulous cook. Even after the fire department shows up.

**A.N. How Knox lost a NON cordless phone, I'm not quite sure. It's a gift really. **

**-C**


	89. Good Morning Starshine

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 88: Good Morning Starshine**

How To Wake Up Early Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Open your window so you can wake to the sound of birds chirping. If only it hadn't been raining all night your plan would have been foolproof.

Todd: No need to do anything, Neil'll start jumping on your bed when he wants you to get up. Which may or may not be before 5 o'clock.

Charlie: Waking up early isn't going to happen, so just tell them not to expect you. I mean if your up before lunch that's quite a shock.

Knox: Put your alarm clock all the way across the room so you'll have to get up to turn it off. This was a good plan; until you ran into the dresser.

Cameron: Demand you receive a wake up call. At _boarding school. _

Meeks: Go to bed a little bit earlier and set your alarm. It's not a difficult process.

Pitts: Build a alarm clock/frying pan which will not only wake you up but also make you breakfast at the same time.

**A.N. Bah, I have to get up at 6:00 tomorrow, oh cruel fate. On a more positive note, this is number 11 so I'm almost half way there with about a month to go. Yay! So, I was wondering if anyone had any suggestions for what I should do when I get to 100. I'm not stopping this, but I think I'll work on some other things more frequently. **

**-C**


	90. Burning The Midnight Oil

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 89: Burning The Midnight Oil**

How To Do A Project Last Minute Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Seriously, it doesn't matter if you did the project or not. You're Neil Perry and that's all that matters.

Todd: Throw together something vaguely related to the project and hope the teacher will be obnoxious and find some deep meaning within it.

Charlie: Camp out outside Meeks' room until he gives in and helps you with your project.

Knox: Completely forget until about ten minutes until it's due. Beg your teacher for an extension, cry if you really have to.

Cameron: Scrap the whole thing and decide instead to try and get on the teachers good side. A little boot-licking never hurt anyone.

Meeks: What? You had that project done weeks ago.

Pitts: Completely confuse your teachers when your only half done and that's mostly the decoration part. They were sure they had heard you talking about a 'science project' for weeks now.

**A.N. Projects suck. End of story. I know Pitts says it's a 'Science Experiment' but lets just pretend it's project for the sake of the theme. M'kay?**

**-C**


	91. Blockbuster

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 90: Blockbuster**

How To Rent A Movie Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Pick one which will be entertaining, though provoking, and soulful. Or which ever one has the shiniest, most exciting cover.

Todd: Go looking for movies with actors who look like people you know. Like that one with Boy Scout Neil.

Charlie: Try and drag people into the little room with the black curtain. Which actually turns out just to be storage and not the fun place you thought it was.

Knox: Go looking for your favourite movie of all time to discover it's not there. Some jerk called 'Knox Overstreet' has it out.

Cameron: Watch them all in alphabetical order, because you're such a rebel.

Meeks: Become forced into paying for everyone's movies including Charlie's dirty ones, because everyone else forgot their membership cards.

Pitts: Skip down the aisle going 'Ennie Meanie Minie Moe' to decide which one you're going to watch.

**A.N. I want a cup-pie, anyone who gets the reference in this chapter can have one too. **

**-C**


	92. Workin' At The Car Wash

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 91: Workin' At The Car Wash**

How To Wash A Car Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Using the hot water to make steam write your name on the side of the car. Which was great until it wouldn't fade out of the wax.

Todd: Ask repeatedly why you couldn't have just _gone_ to a car wash instead.

Charlie: Run around spraying everyone with the hose in an attempt to get some sort of sexy car wash thing going.

Knox: Accidentally use the car wax instead of soap. Oh well at least it'll be really shiny.

Meeks: Keep having to stop and wipe off your glasses because you can't see. Thanks guys, it's hilarious to spray the guy with glasses. Ha ha.

Cameron: Go around after it's been washed going; 'You missed a spot'. Stop after Charlie informs you he'll wipe it off with you.

Pitts: Insist on sing 'Car Wash' the _entire time_. Complete with disco dance breaks.

**A.N. I'm sorry! I haven't updated in ages, er, a week. Bah, I still have like...9 to go. I know that doesn't sound like too many, but I'm totally swamped for the next few weeks. Wish me luck.**

**-C**


	93. Sand, Sun, and Surf

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 92: Sand, Sun, and Surf**

How To Go To The Beach Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Freak out when you get there because you can't find your dragon floaty and refuse to go into the water without it.

Todd: Pout all day because you hate the beach, you hate the sand that manages to get everywhere, you hate getting sun burnt, and you hate the idea of swimming in a places where millions of kids have peed.

Charlie: Relax on your towel and sunbathe, that is until people start 'accidentally' stepping on you.

Knox: Completely over react at the minnows swimming in the shallows and and run out claiming they were trying to eat your foot.

Cameron: Complain that the sun's too hot, and the water's too cold, and the sand is too sandy.

Meeks: Crouch down to look at the interesting wildlife in the tide pool until someone thinks it's funny to scare you so you'll fall into one.

Pitts: Make the worlds greatest sand castle using a combination of architectural beauty and technological advancement. If only you hadn't built it so close to the water.

**A.N. Todd's so grumpy in this lately....cheer up buttercup. Anyways, Todd's bit was actually written by the lovely Rhyme or Reason and I'm simply stealing- I mean, borrowing it.**

**-C**


	94. Rubber Ducky

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 93: Rubber Ducky**

How To Have A Shower Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Use your soap to make foam which you can make pictures on the shower wall with. Oh, and you know, wash up if you have time.

Todd: Get up extra, extra, early so you won't have to be naked around anyone else. The only problem is falling asleep on the shower wall and being discovered kind of ruins it.

Charlie: Gross everyone out by telling them of all the possible dirty escapades which could have happened in the showers so they'll leave and you can use the good shower. Or the just push them out from under it, but that's not as much fun.

Knox: Slip and fall two or three times before you even get in the shower. Which results in everyone arguing over whether your resulting bruises look like a headless sheep or a crab wearing suspenders.

Cameron: Sing loudly and off key when you think everyone in the changing rooms can't hear you. Who knew you were so into Gilbert and Sullivan.

Meeks: Try and sneak in shampoo from home, because soap really doesn't do anything for your curls.

Pitts: Bring your radio into the bathroom and try and start an epic shower dance party. Probably would have worked better though if the water hadn't short-circuited the system and electrocuted Spaz.

**A.N. Just to put it out there the shower scene is possibly the most wonderful thing on earth. Awkward Todd, half naked Neil and Charlie, and about 5 seconds of Pitts' naked back if you look closely. I've fallen in love with that back. **

**-C**


	95. Pink Frosting

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 94: Pink Frosting**

How To Make A Cake Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: To save your oven from possible explosion decide it's better to buy one and just decorate it.

Todd: Discover the fangirls have actually already made on for you (and a truly alarming amount of cookies) because if anyone _needs_ a cake, it's you.

Charlie: Steal all the leftover frosting. Which results in a _very_ interesting body painting experience.

Knox: Try and eat the batter, and the frosting, and the sprinkles, and oh, oops, looks like you could maybe make a cupcake.

Cameron: End up making a stupid gross taste-free cake because your parents don't think you should eat sugar.

Meeks: Grumble about why you bothered signing up for this stupid thing anyways if everyone was just going to stick you with cleaning the bowls. You didn't even get to lick them!

Pitts: Try and make a 5 layer cake. Which ends being a 5 pile cake instead. Damn you gravity.

**A.N. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! To both the lovely Elfie and the magnum Haykatsi. Hope you have a good one. And to everyone else, whom I love deeply. **

**-C**


	96. Pomp and Circumstance

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 95: Pomp and Circumstance**

How To Graduate Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Get upset when you don't win every award. Isn't that what people do? Give you awards?

Todd: Try and walk extra fast when you get on stage so no one will have time to get any decent pictures of you. Which results in accidentally falling down the stairs which people, miraculously, _did _get pictures of.

Charlie: Refuse to take off your tassel hat because you think it makes you look intellectually dashing. Almost better than a lightning bolt for attracting girls.

Knox: Fall asleep half way through the ceremony. Unfortunately missing receiving your diploma because no one wants to wake you up.

Cameron: Stand up every time they're about to present an award, convinced you'll be the one receiving it. When they don't call you, simply pretend you were adjusting yourself. Much less embarrassing.

Meeks: Set up the entire sound system for the evening, which was stellar and perfectly done. Except for the fact you didn't plug it in.

Pitts: As soon as the ceremonies over run down, in full attire, and jump in the lake. Probably would've been cooler looking if you actually knew how to swim.

**A.N. Baaaah, grad night was SO hot. Poor boys in their fancy suits. I completely forgot what those hats are called. **

**-C**


	97. Everybody Scream!

**Disclaimer: Cloudy Does Not Own**

**Dead Poets Society **

**This is a Haiku**

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 96: Everybody Scream!**

How To Go To An Amusement Park Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Insist on going on every single ride in the front car, even if you're terrified of them. Carpe Diem and all that.

Todd: Have permanant ear damage from being dragged onto every single ride with Neil who screamed beside you the entire time. And that was only on the Merry-Go-Round.

Charlie: Go completely broke trying to win a Purple Unicorn Stuffy for your date. Though in the end they didn't like purple nor unicorns so you gave it to Meeks instead.

Knox: Eat a week's allowence worth of junk food, ride the tallest, fastest roller coaster, puke your guts out, repeat.

Cameron: Complain when everything costs so much. A bag of chips for 3 dollars? A bottle of water for 5? What is this from; the Fountain of Youth?

Meeks: Get stuck holding everyone's hats, bags, food, and general crap while they go on rides. Some how inherit a Purple Unicorn Stuffy in a Top Hat.

Pitts: Run around the park trying to get pictures and autographs from all of the guys in costumes. Even though you're pretty certain at least one was just a janitor.

**A.N. Yay! Summer Hols! Expect update-tastic-ness. Again, does anyone have an suggestions for when I reach 100 chapters? I want to start something new but I have no ideas. (I swear I'll keep doing How To, I just want to try something different as well.)**

**-C**


	98. It Looks Like This Room Has Been

**Disclaimer: Don't own, but I'll ask Tom and Peter for the rights for my birthday. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 97: It Looks Like This Room Has Been Lived In By Pigs**

How To Clean Your Room Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Very neatly clean your room only to lose Oberon the Rock and have to tear everything apart again to find him.

Todd: Decide all the stuff in your room 'wants to fly' and toss it out the window. It's not like you really need most of it anyways.

Charlie: Bribe and/or threaten younger students to do it for. Only when you discover all your Playboy's and your smokes have magically disappeared that this might have been a bad idea.

Knox: Very cunningly stuff everything under you're rug. Say the large bulge is just a dead body you're stashing for Charlie. A surprisingly plausible situation.

Cameron: Vacuum the minuscule dust particles that landed on the floor in the last five minutes since you last cleaned.

Meeks: Decide that it's okay to have your room a bit of a mess. You can always use the 'eccentric genius' excuse on your parents if they complain.

Pitts: Start to clean up all your old action figures but get sidetracked coming up with complex and action packed adventures with them.

**A.N. Seriously, Dead Poet Action Figures, it's a brilliant idea. Why haven't these been made yet?! **

**-C**


	99. Oooooh, Aaaahhh

**Disclaimer: Don't own, but I'll ask Tom and Peter for the rights for my birthday. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 98: Ooooooh, Aaaaaaah**

How To Watch Fireworks Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Love the whole idea of shooting explosions in the air to celebrate your country that you start shouting 'Encore!' at the end.

Todd: Make sure you're there early so you can get a good spot. Though it may have been a little unnecessary to go the day before to pick out your spot.

Charlie: Make so many dirty jokes about 'fireworks' that in the end you're ganged up on and locked in the car.

Knox: Get stuck inside the snack booth buying cotton candy for everyone that you actually ended up missing the fireworks. Though you did get to eat everyone else's cotton candy so maybe it was worth it.

Cameron: Complain that it's too cold, and there are too many bugs, and the fireworks are too loud and not sparkly enough.

Meeks: Come up with a very scientific formula to figure out how much the audience is enjoying the fireworks based on a system of 'ooooh's and 'ahhhhh's.

Pitts: Shout 'Warp 7 Mr. Sulu' every time one goes off because you swear it looks like going into Warp Speed.

**A.N. Right ho, so in honor of a belated Canada day and an early Fourth of July I present you with chapter 98. Just because fireworks are kickass. **

**-C**


	100. How's The Weather Up There?

**Disclaimer: Don't own, but I'll ask Tom and Peter for the rights for my birthday. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 99: How's The Weather Up There? **

How To Climb A Tree Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Try and climb one where the first branch is about 10 feet off the ground. Refuse to admit you can't jump that high.

Todd: Refuse any help getting down even though you are clearly not going to be able to get down easily. Decide you'd rather jump and hurt yourself that tell anyone you're stuck.

Charlie: After numerous failed attempts to climb the tree based on your height get angry and carve your name into the tree. Who's laughing now.

Knox: Attempt to look farther to left to see if you can see our house from here causing you to lose your balance and fall out of the tree. Realise later you would have been able to see your house anyways. You live in Boston.

Cameron: Ugh, why would you want to climb a tree in the first place? Get your hands all dirty, and tear you're clothes? No thanks.

Meeks: Get a ladder. Put ladder up against tree. Climb ladder into tree. Yell at Charlie who's decide to knock you're ladder over and trap you up there.

Pitts: Just step up into it. You're just that tall (and awesome).

**A.N. Omigosh, omigosh, omigosh, only 1 more chapter until we hit triple digits. That's a bit frightening. I can't believe I had the attention span to stick with this. In a good way of course. **

**-C**


	101. This Is How I Made It To 100

**Disclaimer: Don't own, but I'll ask Tom and Peter for the rights for my birthday. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 100: This Is How I Made It To 100**

How To Write A 'How To Like A Dead Poet' Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: The last crazy thing he made Todd do with him with ridiculous amounts of adorable.

Todd: The last crazy thing Neil made him do. Even more amounts of adorable.

Charlie: Sexual, sexual, sexual, Meeks, that's what she said.

Knox: Stalking Chris/Falling down stairs/falling over things/nose bleeds.

Cameron: Being a jerkwad. It's _really_ simple.

Meeks: Logical, logical, logical, Charlie, mother hen.

Pitts: Something completely insane, ridiculous, or against the laws of physics. But come on it's Pitts, no one will question it.

**A.N. Basically my unoffical template for 'How To'. But who cares about that!? I MADE 100 CHAPTERS! Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who's reviewed and faved and generally been awesome. I love you guys. **

**-C**


	102. Do You Have Reservations?

**Disclaimer: Don't own, but I'll ask Tom and Peter for the rights for my birthday. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 101: Do You Have Reservations?**

How To Work At A Restaurant Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Try and convince you're boss that saying 'To battle stations!' at the beginning of the night when sending people to their assigned tasks will really liven things up.

Todd: Get a shirt with the days specials written on it so you won't have to say them out loud to people you don't know. Realise this might not have been such a good idea since the specials change everyday.

Charlie: Clean the mirrors in the bathrooms repeatedly so you can get out of doing any real work, _and_ check yourself out at the same time.

Knox: After nearly killing yourself cleaning the floors end up stuck with conversation duty. Smiling and pretending to be interested in what stuffy old rich people have to say, is a lot like Welton really.

Cameron: Rig the rotations by claiming injuries and appointments so you can get the easiest and shortest jobs. If that fails boss around younger employees to do your jobs for you. When that fails, cry.

Meeks: Offer to bring the dishes out from the kitchen because honestly you don't trust anyone else in a room filled with hot, pointy, dangerous things.

Pitts: Lobby for themed dress up dinners. When the idea is shoot down decide to dress up by yourself because as long as it's black bottoms and white top it's still considered in uniform.

**A.N. Based on my new job, which I have to say I only took on because of Robert Sean Leonard. I blame you for my suffering. If you think conversation duty is made up? Then you are sorely mistaken. **

**-C**


	103. It's For You

**Disclaimer: Don't own, but I'll ask Tom and Peter for the rights for my birthday. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 102: It's For You**

How To Make A Phone Call Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Purposely call when you know they'll be out so you can leave them messages repeatedly demanding where they are.

Todd: Make crackling sounds so you can blame bad connection and get off the phone as quick as possible. Though you probably should have told Meeks that.

Charlie: Casually try and bring up the possibilty of phone sex as quickly as possible into the conversation, sometimes even replacing 'hello.' with 'So what are you wearing?'.

Knox: Wait until the person you're calling picks up before going 'You've just won a million dollars!-Don't hang up it's Knox!'.

Cameron: Do that annoying 'y'ello' thing just because you know it bothers everyone else.

Meeks: Disconnect and rewire the phone because you thought the sound was a little bit fuzzy. It can also make toast now too.

Pitts: Start going through the phone book and calling everyone alphabetically. Just so you can ask how their day went.

**A.N. I know I haven't updated in like a week, please forgive me my lovely lovelies. Anywho, here's the deal, my computer is messed up pretty badly so I have to send it into the shop for a few weeks. But hopefully I can borrow my dad's while he's away. **

**ALSO, has anyone ever noticed the only person who's never been paired with Charlie is Pitts? Seriously, why not? (Okay and Cameron, but come on, ew.) I would read that. **

**-C**


	104. This Way Up

**Disclaimer: Don't own, but I'll ask Tom and Peter for the rights for my birthday. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 103: This Side Up**

How To Pack A Dead Poet:

Neil: Go crazy with the masking tape labeling everything 'Property of Neil!'. Even stuff that isn't yours but you've always liked.

Todd: Try and single handedly carry a piano down a flight of very vertical stairs because you didn't want to ask for help.

Charlie: Help put stuff in the truck so whenever someone comes to put something in you can jump out and scare them. Because it totally didn't lose it's novelty the first time.

Knox: Accidentally-on-purpose drop a box of china. What? Those plates were ugly.

Cameron: Under go the exhausting and difficult job of packing the linens and lugging them around. You're such a martyr.

Meeks: Pack everything in alphabetical order. Because really, you can never be too organized.

Pitts: Pretend it's Tetris and attempt to cram everything you own into one box. Which worked brilliantly until you freaked out because your stuffed Rhino couldn't breathe in there.

**A.N. SORRY! Ugh, I'm horrible and awful and please forgive me. Personal life sucks when it keeps me away from DPS and you guys. (It's sweet and more than a little sad.) Have mercy on me and review? Please? **

**-C**


	105. Lions, and Tigers, and Bears, Oh My!

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 104: Lions, and Tigers, and Bears, Oh My!**

How To Go To The Zoo Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Beg the guy running the pony ride to let you go on not matter how much dignity you lose grovelling.

Todd: Buy Neil the world's most expensive hobby horse from the gift shop to make up for the pony ride fiasco.

Charlie: Attempt to bribe the lion trainer to 'accidently' lock Cameron in the cage during feeding time.

Knox: Become the first and only person ever to walk out of the petting zoo with a black eye, two broken toes, a missing patch of hair, and a near fatal nose bleed.

Cameron: Avoid Charlie trying to attach meat to your jacket by hiding in the reptile house. Too bad Charlie's not afraid of snakes.

Meeks: Try and be a good sport when the giraffe's take a liking to licking the side of your face. That is until everyone starts taking pictures of it.

Pitts: Spend ten minutes arguing with Meeks that, that moose _totally_looked like your brother. Never mind the difference of species.

**A.N. The. Zoo. Is. Awesome. End of story. **

**-C**


	106. Jiggle It

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 105: Jiggle It**

How To Get Into Your Locker (When You've Forgotten The Combo) Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Remember you wrote down your combo and hid it in a super secret location for an emergency like this. Too bad you don't remember where the super secret hiding place was.

Todd: Ummm...reset the combo?

Charlie: Attempt to use Cameron and/or some underclassmen as a battering ram. If that doesn't work you can always force them to let you use their locker for the time being.

Knox: Steal the bolt cutters from the janitor's office because you didn't want to bother him while his soaps were on. It worked great, and they're pretty sure they can re-attach that finger too!

Cameron: Excuse me, but no Cameron would ever use such a filthy and grungy thing like a locket to store their very important belongings.

Meeks: Even though it defeats all logical explanation, banging the door a few times usually works.

Pitts: Use all the super spy tricks you've learned over the years from the backs of kids cereal boxes to open the lock simply by ear. Extra points for a disguise and/or night-vision goggles.

**A.N. I have one of those word combo locks and the combo is 'Meeks', I love that lock. Also I'm pretty sure they don't have lockers at Welton, but let's all pretend, because seriously, it's not exactly the most implausible thing I've ever done. **

**And now it's time for; Cloudy's Dead Poet Moment of The Day!****TM****: So, I was reading **_**The Perks of Being a Wallflower **_**and the main character mentions watching Dead Poets Society on page 165. Now I'm all warm and fuzzy inside. Yay for acknowledgment! **

**-C**


	107. Spin Cycle

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 106: Spin Cycle**

How To Do Laundry Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Put it off until you're running out of clothes and have to start borrowing from a cranky Todd. Turns out he disliked that so much he did your laundry for you.

Todd: Run it all through as quickly as possible to avoid any awkward questions about why all your underwear now says 'Neil' on the waistband.

Charlie: Try and convince completely innocent bystanders to have sex _in_ the dryer while you're waiting for your first load to run through the washing machine. (And yes, the burns were totally worth it.)

Knox: Replace laundry soap with dish soap, because really it's all made of the same stuff right? Your clothes were perfectly clean even if the machine short circuited half way through.

Cameron: Burn your clothes and buy new ones once every two weeks. Your a rich bastard, you can do stuff like that.

Meeks: Accidentally use softener instead of detergent, resulting in people petting your clothes for a whole week going 'Oooooo, soooooft'.

Pitts: Purposely mix all your colours and whites together to see if you can get all your white school shirts to come out tye dyed.

**A.N. Teenaged boys and laundry, never a safe combination. **

**-C**


	108. Can I Pay In Pennies?

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 107: Can I Pay In Pennies? **

How To Save Money Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Put Oberon the Rock on guard of your stash of cash. You wouldn't want to have him give you that _look_ if you went into your savings.

Todd: Start making Neil pay for clothing rental when he doesn't want to do his laundry and feels like using your stuff.

Charlie: Keep all your money tucked in the pages of your Latin book, because how likely is it that you'll actually be using it?

Knox: Start actually getting 10 cents everytime you get a completely unexpected and unexplained nose bleed. You'd be surprised at how fast that starts to add up.

Cameron: Have your daddy set you up a high interest savings account with at least 500 dollars kept in the bank that your family is -of course- partnered with.

Meeks: Start collecting from people for all those times you've tutored them. Even Charlie, though he insists he has actually learned anything when you were supposedly 'doing homework'.

Pitts: Switch to using the no-name brand electrical wiring on the radio. The saving totally make up for the electrical burns and it's tendency to simultaneously combust.

**A.N. I'm seeing Midsummer tommorow at the Stratford Festival, I'm so excited. Though, I wish the guy playing Puck was Neil. How awesome would that be?**

**-C**

**P.S. Oberon the Rock has eyes drawn on, that's how he can give Neil a look, just so you know. **


	109. Geranamo!

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 108: Geranamo! **

How To Go Bungee Jumping Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Insist everyone jump at the same time, even though there's only on bungee cord. Well, you suppose you could go without.

Todd: Forcefully hold Neil back from the edge of the platform because you know he just wants to jump bungee, or not.

Charlie: Tell everyone the best way to go down is 'on their back with their legs spread wide'. Only later realising that this is better advice for zip lining, among other things.

Knox: Flat out refuse to go down once you look over the edge claiming they'll have to carry you kicking and throw you over the edge. So that's what they did.

Cameron: Avoid Charlie who has tried half a dozen times to push you off the platform before your bungee was attached. Also Knox who has yet another nose bleed from the altitude.

Meeks: Don't throw up. Don't throw up. Don't throw up. Don't throw up. Oh god, you're gonna hurl.

Pitts: Accidentally invent the saying 'geranamo' when the instructor asks you what you first name was again and simultaneously pushes you off the platform.

**A.N. I don't know why I have to credit you for the idea, if it was your idea YOU KNOW IT WAS YOUR IDEA! Geez. Also, Charlie's sort of belongs to some random guy Rhyme knows. **

**-C**

EDIT: Neil's has been fixed. Sorry about that guys.


	110. Clean Up In Aisle 4

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 109: Clean Up In Aisle 4**

How To Go Grocery Shopping Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Refuse to even go into the store unless they have those novelty kiddie shopping carts. Who cares if you permantly injure your back for the sake of being kitcsh?

Todd: Spend the majority of your week's food budget on orange juice while at the same time denying you have an O.J. addiction. Also all the vitamin C is probably good for you and the only reason you're not in a wheelchair with all the tackling that seems to follow...well, everything.

Charlie: Who needs to buy food? You'll just mooch off Meeks and Cameron and spend the money you'll save on useful things, like more red paint.

Knox: Have **EXTREME **cart races with Charlie (again) until you get banned from the store (again) and have to live off of stale ramen noddles (again) until they'll let you come back.

Cameron: Buy everything based on a strict balance of taste, nutrition value, and cost, or, you know, whatever has the nicest packaging.

Meeks: Write your entire list for the week based on a theme. This week; 'Food's that are Square'. Or 'Food's That Charlie Hates So He'll Stop Eating All Of Mine'

Pitts: Rescue one of those lobster's you can buy fresh from the store and hide it in your dorm. You have plans to start the world's first lobster circus. Oh right, and buy some food while you're at it too.

**A.N. So, today, I just happened to look at my traffic page accidentally when I was updating the last chapter, and turns out I've had more than 26 000 hits on this. That's insanity, so once again, for the billionth time. Thanks guys. xoxoxox**

**-C**

**Oberon the Rock say:  
...**

**Well, okay if he could talk he'd tell you to review. (You know he would!)**


	111. With The Candlestick

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 110: With The Candlestick **

How To Play Clue Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: "How could you betray me like that! You, you, _Murderer_." "Neil, Neil, it's just a game, he didn't even know." "Shut _up_ Knox!"

Todd: Spend the whole game getting more and more nervous that the person you're playing will be the murderer, even when logically you know it's not. You still have nightmares about the time you were on the receiving end of Neil's rage.

Charlie: Write over all the locations so they say 'The Bedroom' and shout out 'Kinky!' everytime someones finished guessing.

Knox: Mark everything on your card in code so no one will be able to peak at what you know. Just make sure the code isn't so complicated you end up forgetting what anything actually stands for. (Like the last 6 times.)

Cameron: Since only 6 people can play end up being designated as the 'old dead guy'. Which was fine until Charlie demanded a reenactment of 'your' death. Complete with authentic wrench.

Meeks: Refuse to play when for the 34th time in a row you're stuck being Miss Scarlett, no matter how much anyone else insists you're perfect because of the uncanny resemblance.

Pitts: Insist on hauling out your pipe and beard to look more detectively. Chin stroking constantly is also a plus, as is saying 'elementary'.

**A.N. Inspired by (**_**stolen from**_**) one of those 3 am talks I had with Thyme. Also, I have seen editions of Clue where on the box illustrations Miss Scarlett does look a**_** lot **_**like Meeks. **

**-C**

**Oberon the Rock say:  
...**

**Well, okay if he could talk he'd tell you to review. (You know he would!)**


	112. The Game Of Champions

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 111: The Game Of Champions**

How To Play Dodgeball Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Practically fall over yourself racing to get any ball you can and then throw them as hard as you can without and real purpose or aim. By the time the games over you haven't hit anything other than the wall but you're even more deliriously happy then usual so it's a success.

Todd: End up being the last person in the game because you imployed the tactic of 'stand completely still and no one will notice and throw at you'.

Charlie: Hide behind Cameron. The human shield!

Knox: End up being hit with the ball more times than anyone else in the game, but ending as the last person left regardless, because face shots don't count.

Cameron: Keep pointing out when people get hit with the ball and didn't get called out. Except of course when it's people on _your_ team.

Meeks: Come up with an exceedingly complicated and successful method to mathematically predict the best game outcomes for your team. Too bad you got it in the face 15 seconds in and didn't have time to apply it before you passed out.

Pitts: Try and convince your gym teacher to change it to only above the waist shots. Since your pretty sure no one can throw that high on you, you'll likely win on default.

**A.N. I know you're probably going; 'Cloudy, seriously Meeks got knocked out by a dodgeball?' BUT, that's based on actual events. When I played dodgeball with volleyballs, (I don't know why, but this just shows why you shouldn't) this guy got hit badly in the head and actually passed out. I'm just saying, it's possible. **

**-C**

**P.s. ALSO! Also, also, also, we finally have character tags! Guys, this is huge. **

**Oberon the Rock say:  
...**

**Well, okay if he could talk he'd tell you to review. (You know he would!)**


	113. Bring Your Own Pillow

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 112: Bring Your Own Pillow**

How To Have A Sleepover Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Freak everyone out by not only rolling around like crazy, and sleep walking, but also yelling out '**FISH STICKS**!'at random intervals your sleep.

Todd: Accidentally and completely unintentionally start an epic free for all pillow war when you toss your pillow over your shoulder and hit Neil square in the face.

Charlie: Warn everyone the first person to fall asleep will be drawn on with lipstick. Or rather _someone _will wake up with lipstick print kisses all over their face...among other places.

Knox: Completely gorge yourself on cheezies and spend half of the night throwing up in florescent orange.

Cameron: Try to convince everyone that your face mask is in fact _very _manly and the reason for your wonderful complexion.

Meeks: Note that if an unknowing bystander were to hear your game of twister they might have other ideas about what was going on, before quickly adding; 'Charlie, don't get any ideas.'

Pitts: Insist on having a karoke contest using your tricked out stereo system. Unfortunately you think the volume might have been set a smidge too high since Knox is practically deaf after your rendition of 'Dancing Queen'.

**A.N. Dead Poets Sleepover Time! You **_**know **_**it'd be awesome. And seriously, twister sounds really dirty when your playing: 'Oh, yeah, put your leg there, and I'll just move my leg here...' 'Ya, okay that works, OH! Ow, no don't put your hand **_**there**_**.' **

**-C **


	114. WARNING: May Cause Screaming

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 113: WARNING: May Cause Screaming**

How To Get Your Caffeine Fix Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: After an incident involving an all nighter studying followed by running down the halls and screaming you've been forced to sign a contract saying you will never again drink coffee in large quantities. The funny thing is, you didn't even drink it the first time.

Todd: After the advisers swept your room and took all of your tea bags to save Neil from the horrors of caffeine you're stuck drinking boiling water from the Winnie The Pooh mug everyone else refuses to use.

Charlie: Whip out your badass Justice League thermos and drink your coffee in _style_.

Knox: Try and prove your ultimate manliness by drinking caseloads of energy drinks. Girls totally dig the sweaty, twitchy, over stimulated look right?

Cameron: Argue loudly that drinking Earl Grey tea isn't _that_old lady-ish. Or rather it wasn't until you started using the expensive blue patterned porcelain tea cups to drink it from.

Meeks: Practically gag over the instant stuff someone managed to dig up from the teachers lounge because cafe's have made you soft to all coffee beverages other than soy chi lattes.

Pitts: Skip the coffee bit and go straight to pouring cream and milk and those cute little packets of sugar into a mug. It's bound to give you the same amount of energy anyways.

**A.N. Can't you just see Meeks being one of those Starbucks junkies? Next time I go to one, I'm gonna say my name is Meeks and get that on the side of my cup.**

**-C **


	115. Hey Mr Postman

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 114: Hey Mr. Postman**

How To Send A Letter Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Go a little overboard with the postage stamps, which wouldn't have been _that_ bad save the fact they were from Cameron's very rare and very valuable collection. But at your defense it's not your fault none of yours had any cool pictures on them.

Todd: Make sure you include all the formalities and technicalities you were taught in your writing classes. Even when it's just a note for Neil telling him to stop going through your stuff while your gone. (Placed strategically in your desk drawer.)

Charlie: Flirt with the ladies at the post office who are sadly completely oblivious when you start talking about your 'special delieveries' and if they would like you to 'like their stamps'. Though maybe that's a good thing because those shorts are a turn-off.

Knox: Try and write a reply without looking at the original and end up having to add p.s through p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s

Cameron: Try to cheap out and reuse the stamp on the last letter you were sent. Unfortunately the post office caught on to your clever plot and sent it back with 'nice try' scribbled on the side

Meeks: Put off writing back for weeks while you try and figure out what the 'I less than 3 you' at the bottom of the letter is supposed to mean.

Pitts: After spending 3 hours trying to find the right address for your letter, decide when you grow up you'll live in an orange house so you can simply put 'Gerard Pitts, Orange House' on the envelope and be done with it.

**A.N. I wrote this and my chem lab simultaneously just to give myself something to live for. I. Hate. Chemistry. **

**-C **


	116. Tooth Fairy

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 115: Tooth Fairy**

How To Go To The Dentist Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Paranoidly brush your teeth 6 times a day in the week leading up to your appointment because it's absolutely _vital_ you get another one of those stickers for having no cavities.

Todd: Having drills, and the pointy metal things, and someones hands in your mouth, and that scraping sound when they clean your teeth,and having that light shined _right_in your eyes, and the general antiseptic-ness of the place really unnerves you. Which is your completely rational excuse for having a panic attack in the waiting room.

Charlie: Ask your dentist if he could maybe cement a little diamond in one of your front teeth so your smile would actually sparkle. Or so you could blind your enemies with it.

Knox: Accidentally sneeze while they're administering the Novocaine and end up getting numbed up so bad you can't talk for three weeks, though Charlie jokes that that's probably a good thing.

Cameron: Show your dentist your very fancy and very expensive electric tooth brush that rotates, spins, and includes everything but the kitchen sink. Too bad he's informed you it actually isn't working any better than your old manual tooth brush.

Meeks: Pout for a solid hour after your appointment because you got a yellow toothbrush. You don't like yellow, dammit.

Pitts: Since you can whiten your teeth suggest that maybe they should have the option of other colours too, there could be a lot of money in that idea. Plus, come on, who wouldn't want rainbow teeth?

**A.N. Awwwww, Todd doesn't like the dentist. Poor wookie. (In other news, calling Todd a wookie is my new favourite thing ever.)**

**-C **

**P.s. Holy crap I made Meeks sound like Bones. **


	117. Gee, Officer Krupke

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 116: Gee, Officer Krupke**

How To Get Out Of A Ticket Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Explain vaguely that you would love to explain why you were parked in a no parking zone but that would involve hours and hours of complicated back-story and you're sure that an important law enforcing officer has other business to attend to.

Todd: Use your patented 'I'm-Todd-Anderson-and-I-are-a-kicked-puppy' face to subtly persuade the officer to let you off with a warning, and sometimes a lollipop.

Charlie: Graciously admit your law breaking and accept the ticket. But only because you need a good cover for all the _other_ things they could be busting you for.

Knox: Cry, seriously it makes them feel awkward and they'll let you off. Now if only that was only a clever strategy and not actual waterworks.

Cameron: Bring out all that 'Do you know who my father is!?' fanfare and end up being arrested for threatening an officer and disturbing the peace.

Meeks: Just suck it up and pay the ticket, despite suggestions of excuses involving being pregnant being yelled from the backseat.

Pitts: Make up an elaborate story involving the CIA, 3 pounds of feathers, a miniature poodle with a missing leg, and a Belgian trapeze artist named Pierre in an attempt to explain why you _had_ to be going 80 in a 50 zone.

**A.N. Hey, so I'm **_**preeetty**_**sure that this was Samdum's idea, but just in case it wasn't and I'm crediting the wrong person just let me know. Who's ever idea it was though, it was a good one, this was really fun to write. **

**-C **


	118. Crop Circles

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 117: Crop Circles**

How To Get Out Of A Corn Maze Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Jump up and down trying to see the exit and when failing to locate it demand someone give you a piggyback. Not so you can see the exit, but because all that jumping around has tired you out.

Todd: Act like you know exactly which way you're going and how to get out when really you've just been going 'eenie meenie miney mo' every time you've come to a crossroad. Which actually seems to work surprisingly.

Charlie: Try and make markers to identify which ways you've already gone by carving 'Nuwanda is King' or lightning bolts into the ground. Which was actually a pretty good idea until you went a little overboard and started doing them every few feet to proclaim your awesomeness.

Knox: Refuse to go in because you have reoccurring nightmares about that time you got trapped in a maze when you were young. Instead volunteer to wait outside and 'keep score'.

Cameron: Cut through the corn rows when no ones looking. What? If they didn't want you to cut they should use something a bit more impenitrable than stalks of corn.

Meeks: Hug the left wall all the way through and make up some crap about using a geometrical algorithm and the movement of the sun to impress everyone else.

Pitts: Bring your magical forked finding rod passed down through generations of Pitts. Because even though Meeks has tried to prove it's illogical and won't work several times now you do always seem to be the first one out of the maze. Though it has been pointed out that that might be because you're tall enough to simply look over the tops of the rows.

**A.N. At the risk of sounding whiny and ungrateful (which I am not at **_**all**_**) I feel like people haven't being reviewing as much lately. Though, I do partially just miss getting reviews, it also has me feeling a bit...I guess paranoid that people aren't enjoying the I do think this may be purely because of people heading back to school and such. Anyways, long story short, review please, because I really truly care what you guys think. **

**-C **


	119. NEW YORK CITY BLACKOUT!

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 118: NEW YORK CITY BLACK-OUT! **

How To Deal With A Power Outage Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Be the first to call dibs on all the flashlights so you can put on a wicked shadow puppet performance. Refuse to turn them back on though, when Pitts completely outdoes your dog with a complicated moose, complete with realistic noises.

Todd: Quickly volunteer to find and light all the candles. Not because you want to be able to put them where you can stare at them mesmerized or anything, but only because you want to be helpful. Yes, helpful, that's it.

Charlie: Start listing all the fun, fun, things you could be doing in the dark. NO! Not _those _things, I'm talking about flashlight tag you perverts. Geez.

Knox: Surprisingly come out of the whole experience as the only person to come out of it without and bruises on your legs from tripping over furniture or banging into doors. Or you were until the lights came back on, surprising you badly enough to jump and fall into the wardrobe, leaving you with a decent 'leg hickey'.

Cameron: Spend the entire blackout arguing uselessly that the high pitched scream everyone heard when the lights went off wasn't you but in fact a internal pressure issue of the pipes. You know these old buildings, not the best running plumbing.

Meeks: Huff around for a while mad that the dean has concluded that your generator, though technically sound, is too dangerous to use to power the school. Just because you electrocuted that _one _guy that _one _time, you're sure his hair will start growing back any day now.

Pitts: Try and use the opportunity to get everyone into a round of 'What it's like to be Blind' which is essentially walking around in the dark with your eyes closed trying to find your way around or trying to identify people by feeling their faces. Your enthusiasm for this idea is only slightly dampened by the fact the outage is in the middle of the day and you can still see around perfectly fine.

**A.N. Todd Anderson; Kind of a Pyro (It's canon). Also, all the hypotetical internet cupcakes you can eat for whoever gets the title reference. **

**-C **


	120. Would You Like Fries With That?

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 119: Would You Like Fries With That? **

How To Go Through The Drive Thru Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: As a joke make up a song/poem thing of an unbelievably long order and sing it when your going through. Joke's on you though when it turns up the cashier could keep up and is expecting you to pay.

Todd: Get dragged along to play the harmonica as back up for Neil's song and then to pay when he realises not everyone thinks impromptu drive thru songs are as hilarious as he does.

Charlie: Yell at the person ordering the entire time that it's absolutely crucial that you get lots of extra ketchup so you can put little lickable lightning bolts on everything (and everyone).

Knox: Be that one idiot who starts shouting his order at the garbage can and can't understand why his order cameout wrong.

Cameron: Be that one jerk who tells the cashier the people in the car behind you are paying for you stuff and take off before they can memorize your license plate.

Meeks: Insist that even though it's illogical because you _went through the drive thru _everyone must get out of the car to eat because you don't want to get garbage and crumbs all over your seats.

Pitts: Argue with the guy in the window that, no, you're not walking through the drive through, you're in your invisible rocket car. If it worked for Wonder Woman it'll work for you.

**A.N. It was a reference to Hair guys, not the blackout of 2003 (and that wasn't really NYC anyways, it was like New York State, Ontario...and well I don't know where else but it was pretty huge.) BUT! New reference in this chapter so maybe you guys will be better at spotting it this time. **

**-C **


	121. The Best Thing Since ABBA

**Disclaimer: I'm still begging Peter Weir **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 120: The Best Thing Since ABBA**

How To Shop At IKEA Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Run off and insist on testing every piece of furniture in anyways possible. Which you were having a great time doing until the security guy asks if you could please stop climbing on the stuff even if you were just testing if it was strong enough to play 'The Floor is Made of Lava' on.

Todd: Try completely unsuccessfully to just rush through to one section and leave. Partially because it's huge and confusingly set up, and partially because Neil keeps dragging you off to test the comfort level of chairs.

Charlie: Completely freak out in the kids section and announce how you're buying that red race car bed for yourself _RIGHT NOW_ despite the fact even Neil thinks that's a ridiculous idea.

Knox: Manage to get completely and utterly lost even though the floor has those helpful arrows everywhere and huge maps detailing where exactly you are.

Cameron: Become absolutely fumming when Charlie tricks you into getting pushed into a cabinet, locks it, and walks away. For the third time!

Meeks: Wander around dazed and confused because there seems to be a startling amount of fluffy/glowy/colourful/shiny things that you have no idea what are for.

Pitts: Marvel at the fact you can not only buy furniture here that you have to build yourself but there's _also_ a place to get lunch. The Swedish are brilliant.

**A.N. So, this has a cool story behind it. I walked into English class this morning and on the chalkboard it says 'HOW TO...' with a huge list of ideas under it for this essay project that another class was doing but it was still really...weird. Especially since this was basically the only one on the list I haven't done yet. **

**-C **


	122. Like A Fish Needs A Bicycle

**Disclaimer: I'm still begging Peter Weir **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 121: Like A Fish Needs A Bicycle **

How To Ride A Bike Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Learn to ride a bike at a young age for the soul purpose of one day being able to own your own and proudly calling it the 'Neil-Mobile' which is far less tough sounding and more preschool adorable than you had originally thought.

Todd: Put your feet on the pedals and, um, pedal?

Charlie: Instead of admitting you never learned how to ride a bike get to the top of a huge hill and have someone push you. Which was a bad idea in theory and a much, much, worse idea in application. Of course though it was all worth it to protect your manly reputation.

Knox: Try and look as cool as possible while riding your older sisters hand me down pink princess bike which you tried to paint over with red but just ended up being a rather unfortunate shade of orange. Though maybe you shouldn't have mentioned that to Meeks, seeing as his hair has a rather large resemblance.

Cameron: You never learned because you got angry the first time your parents took the training wheels off your bike and you refused to learn how to ride a two-wheeler in angry protest. A seven-year-old can hold a surprisingly long grudge.

Meeks: Design an ultimate bike for speed, agility, and support which takes you 6 months to design and twice that to make. Too bad Charlie decided it wasn't 'badass' enough and added lightning bolt stickers which threw off the entire design. Though they do look pretty cool so your not too fussed.

Pitts: Since your parents couldn't keep up with buying a new bike every time you had another rapid growth spurt end up trying to sport a rather beat-up tricycle. Incidentally starting a whole new fad by accident.

**A.N. I can't ride a bike, but I sort of have an urge to learn how after this. As well adding lightning bolts to things makes **_**everything**_** cooler. **

**-C **


	123. HoleInOne

**Disclaimer: I'm still begging Peter Weir **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 122: Hole-In-One**

How To Play Mini-Golf Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Make sure your up at the counter first so you can get the colour of ball that you want. The fact that the one you want is shockingly similar to the colour of Todd's eyes is simply a coincidence, everyone knows light blue always does the best, it's just a fact.

Todd: Accidentally stand too close to the windmill and end up being clipped in the back of the head which did hurt a lot. Though it wasn't really neccisary to have everyone start snarkily commenting how much more violent mini-golf has gotten nowadays.

Charlie: Volunteer to 'assist' anyone who needs help putting by cozying up behind them and showing them the right hip movements. And maybe how to putt too.

Knox: Get mad when the lady at the counter will only give you the kiddie club because giving you the full sized one would be a hazard to other players. They didn't know you would still be a hazard to yourself with the kiddie club and walk out with a black eye and a surprisingly good score.

Cameron: Get really angry and refuse to go with a 'lets call that a 5' score on your card because the hole was _cursed_. Or at least that's the excuse you were going to use until everyone else got it in, in less than 3 strokes.

Meeks: Make sure your the only person allowed to keep score because you don't trust anyone else to tell the truth if their lives depended on it. Also, so you can make sure _you_ won't lose, but only because loser has to buy lunch and you didn't bring any money.

Pitts: By the 4th hole have come up with a highly complicated and intricate victory hole-in-one dance that your so proud of you're getting a great score because you want to be able to do it so much. Though the throwing the club and hitting that woman wasn't one of the dance moves you had practised.

**A.N. Happy (Canadian) Thanksgiving, this really has nothing to do with it other than the fact that I am thankful for mini-golf. (The Game of Champions.)**

**-C **


	124. And How Do You Feel About That?

**Disclaimer: I'm still begging Peter Weir **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 123: And How Does That Make You Feel?**

How To Go A Shrink Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Get your father involved by using hand puppets to tell him how you _really_ feel about acting and what's really inside of you. The whole bonding was sort of ruined though when you found out you couldn't keep the puppets.

Todd: The actual session went fine. It was when you tried to get off the coach and found yourself stuck to the leather that was really awkward. Made worse by the fact that they kept taking notes and making that 'mhmm' noise the entire time.

Charlie: Really, truly, sincerely try _not_ to see sexual positions in those stupid ink blots. It's not your fault those blots are doing dirty things.

Knox: Discover you have so many issues going on that they're actually considering coming up with a new term for your general mental health. Though Knoxitis sounds a bit like a gum disease.

Cameron: After only five minutes be shocked and surprised that you actually have a very serious mental condition that has gone unnoticed for years. It's called being a prick.

Meeks: Refuse to answer anymore questions when you happen to see the note pad your shrink has been writing on is actually covered in doodles and the diagnosis of; NERD.

Pitts: Reveal in startling detail the reoccurring nightmare you've had for years in which your mother chases you around with a wooden spoon to Beatle's songs being sung by unicorns. Which apparently means your sexually frustrated.

**A.N. Now I'm totally picturing Meeks on the other side of the clipboard. (Epic Rant, jazziness) Also, I **_**really**_** hope I don't accidentally offend anyone. This is more poking fun at bad shrinks/therapist/life coaches and trust me, their are some bad ones out there.**

**-C **


	125. Triple Word Score

**Disclaimer: I'm still begging Peter Weir **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 124: Triple Word Score **

How To Play Scrabble Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Realise that about half the pieces are missing because you may or may not have gone through a phase of using them to make swears, laughing like an idiot, and then quickly messing them up before anyone else could see and frown disapprovingly.

Todd: Start to make up words about halfway through the game because of course no one would ever suspect you of cheating, also all the great poets did it too. You think yawp was a real word before Whitman?

Charlie: When Cameron complains that you can't use 'Nuwanda' because it's a proper noun, counter that it's also a little known synonym for awesome. True fact.

Knox: _Somehow_and not even Meeks is sure how, but somehow, manage to win by only using 3 letter words the entire game. Though you were fairly proud of managing 'zoo'.

Cameron: Accidentally on purpose flip over the board and send all the pieces flying when you realise you're losing badly. I mean come on, what would you do if _Knox_ was beating you?

Meeks: About half way through the game realise you have somehow become the official dictionary because everyone trusts your judgement, even though to be honest you aren't sure if most of those were words or not.

Pitts: Get mad when someone comments you got all really bad letters z, q, x, v, j, x, and y. Their not bad their just 'The Misunderstood Letters'.

**A.N. AHHHH! People have been updating! This is wondrous! **

**-C **


	126. Spike!

**Disclaimer: I don't own, but you already know that. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 125: Spike!**

How To Play Volleyball A Dead Poet:

Neil: Start diving head first after every ball that comes in your general direction, if you get a little bruised up it'll just make you look kind of sexy in a hardcore way. Or at least that's what you're telling yourself as you're limping off the court.

Todd: Totally, completely, accidentally whack Cameron in the face during your serve and spend the rest of the game getting angry looks from Cameron (even though you repeatedly apologised) and multiple high fives from Charlie.

Charlie: Come out of the changeroom in boardshorts and demand to know where the girls in bikinis' are. You only agreed to play because you thought it was beach volleyball. Hell, you just though their'd be people with less clothes.

Knox: Manage to somehow get your entire forearm tangled in the net while warming up and have to have it cut off. The net, I mean, not your arm.

Cameron: Confront the coach that Todd has viciously attacked you and you need to be taken out of the game immediately, lookit that red mark, that is so going to bruise.

Meeks: When your coach starts yelling at you for missing the tip, point out calmly that the only way you're going to be able to spike it over the net is if he gives you a step stool.

Pitts: Get called off halfway through the first rally because you were compairing the prettiness of your knee guards with the guy across the net rather than watching the ball.

**A.N. Ugh, we finished a volleyball unit in gym. My arms **_**still**_** hurt. **

**-C**


	127. Going Up, Going Down

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 126: Going Up, Going Down**

How To Ride An Escalator Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Run down the escalator. Laugh hysterically. Run back up the stairs. Repeat.

Todd: Take the stairs, because sticking 6 teenaged boys on the same _moving_ mechanicial staircase is really just asking for it.

Charlie: Even though everyone has told you a thousand times that it's completely safe, you can't help but hold onto the railings with both hands and jump off as quickly as possible. You've seen Final Destination, escalators are the silent killers.

Knox: Actually manage to walk up the down escalator. Not because you were trying to show off or be cool, you just misread the signs. Which explains why it was so hard to climb.

Cameron: Take a handerchief and keep it pressed between your hand and the railing. You have no idea what kinds of crazy people have touch that thing.

Meeks: Accidentally on purpose jam the motors with your shoelaces so you can watch them fix it and make notes. Though doing that didn't exactly help Charlie get over his fear of killer escalators.

Pitts: Try and start an escalator conga line...of one.

**A.N. I have admittedly never walked up the down escalator but I have always wanted too. I'm such an anti-rebel, and maybe that sort of makes me a rebel. Rebelling against rebellion...you know what I'm not even going to get into that, it makes my head hurt. **

**-C**


	128. The Pumpkin King

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 127: The Pumpkin King**

How To Make A Jack-O-Lantern Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Start viciously stabbing your knife into it and end up pulling out only the handle, because who ever thought that would happen?

Todd: Insist that Neil take over what was originally your job of scooping out the guts, because you're pretty sure even Neil has yet to injure anyone with a spoon. Though you couldn't be too sure if it had been a spork.

Charlie: Ask if a pumpkin with 'Cameron' painted on it and a lot of sharp objects pushed into counts as a jack-o-lantern. (Turns out it doesn't.)

Knox: Surprisingly, end up NOT cutting yourself during he entire carving process. Which is definitely mentionable. Though, you did end up burning your hand on the pan when you were roasting the seeds later. But we won't talk about that.

Cameron: Start a fake protest against the mutilation of pumpkins just so you can get out of all this carving nonsense. Though you might have accidentally started a movement with some actual gourd lovers.

Meeks: Turns out your secretly this like county fair pumpkin carving genius only you've never told anybody because it borderlines on "Hey, that's cool" and "Really freaking weird".

Pitts: Instead of carving it throw your pumpkin off a building. For completely professionally science type reasons, and not just because "it was fun".

**A.N. Lookit this completely Halloween related chapter. Hope you have a good one, and forgive me for the lack of Poets in Costumes. Use your imaginations. **

**-C**


	129. Soy Chi Latte

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 128: Soy Chi Latte**

How To Go To A Cafe Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Attempt to share a big comfy chair with another person and end up both being stuck in the purple velvet chair of terror and spilling your coffee everywhere.

Todd: Try and sneak in some plain coffee in a thermos because you really don't get the appeal cafes and only go because what kind of decent wannabe poet doesn't hang out in cafes.

Charlie: Come up with a complicated and highly specific order to make the people behind the counter sweat. When really you don't even know the difference between a latte and a cappuccino.

Knox: Freak out when they don't have any of your crazy expensive bottled water because that's the only reason you even come to a cafe. Or it was until the guy behind the counter pointed out it's actually the same stuff from the tap with a pretty shiny label.

Cameron: Become one of those annoying laptop people who buy one drink and then hog one of the comfy chairs for hours on end. Occasionally reminding everyone that you're writing something really groundbreaking and interesting, so they'd better shut up.

Meeks: Spend a good few minutes contemplating the mash-up of languages everything seems to be written in. Is it the new thing to combine languages to sound edgy?

Pitts: Get 'Captain Super-Awesome III' written on the side of your cup because you told them that was your name. Surprisingly, the only response you get back is; "Your order will be ready soon, Captain."

**A.N. Happy end of daylights savings! We need to start having like greeting cards and stuff for this, that way I won't forget and freak out about being late. Also, with greeting cards comes holiday related baked goods. **

**In other news: HOMIGOD! GUYS! 1010 REVIEWS! AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! **

**-C**


	130. Poster Board

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 129: Poster Board **

How To Do A Group Project Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Somehow manage to get most of the project done by yourself while everyone else went off to discuss what colour poster board they wanted. Though that turned out to be not such a good idea because now your stuck with fluorescent orange.

Todd: Dedicate yourself as gopher. Though, admittedly even though you've seen all the materials you have abosolutely no idea what your group is making, but that may be because you picked up is wires, markers, glitter glue, buttertarts, and a blow torch.

Charlie: Decide that since everyone else is doing all the useless stuff like the writing and the working you'll designate yourself the most important task. Naming the group. Captain Nuwanda's Badass Super Awesome Turbo Squad Alpha has a nice ring to it.

Knox: Get asked too simply highlight the important information in the notes you were given but go a little overboard with it until all of your information looks like a rainbow threw up on the page.

Cameron: Give everyone else a really low mark on the group evaluation, which actually ends up biting you in the ass when everyone else does the same to you.

Meeks: Politely tell everyone in your group that you appreciate them trying to help but they should really just back off and let you do it yourself for the sake of grades and quite possibly your sanity, because they are all idiots.

Pitts: Completely forget about all of your work until halfway through breakfast the day of, though somehow you actually manage to get the highest mark on your portion. Maybe it's your charms.

**A.N. Lookit this super special not even birthday related chapter, oh well. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TODDERS! **

**-C**


	131. Goodnight Moon

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 130: Goodnight Moon**

How To Get Ready For Bed Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Go through the routine of getting Oberon all ready for bed before you even think of putting your pajamas on or brushing your teeth.

Todd: Take about 5 minutes deciding whether or not you want to set your alarm, because you need to wake up on time, but you hate the buzzing noise. When Neil comes crashing back in the room shouting about something or other realise you probably won't need it to wake you up.

Charlie: _(Due to the fact that this is rated T I'm actually not allowed to tell you what Charlie likes to do before bed.)_

Knox: Watch a twenty minute section of your favourite movie which you've seen so often you usually fall asleep mouthing along with the actors.

Cameron: Go over an actual physical checklist to make sure you've done everything you needed to do for that day and then quickly plan your list for tomorrow.

Meeks: Take some time to just relax and read Scientific America, though just so everyone doesn't think your a _total_ nerd hide it behind an old issue of Playboy.

Pitts: Double check that your wearing the pair of pajama's that matches the day. Plaid for Monday, sheep for Tuesday, stripes for Wednesday, polka dots for Thursday, robots for Friday, penguins for Saturday, and your extra special glitter pajamas for Sunday.

**A.N. I was on my facebook the other day and it said 'Chelsea Foote (not her real name) is now friends with Todd Anderson.' I had to go back a few times and check just to make sure I was reading it right. **

**-C**


	132. 98 Pound Weakling

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 131: 98 Pound Weakling**

How To Work Out Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Buy special workout clothes complete with neon white headbands, sweatbands, and knee socks. Which sadly, even you, cannot make work

Todd: Totally hog the rowing machine. Because you didn't want to take soccer, dammit.

Charlie: Mist yourself with water so you can have a sexy sweaty gleam before you even have to do anything. Though you did have to make up an excuse about a pet cactus to explain the spray bottle.

Knox: Work out only your right arm in the hopes of one day becoming an Olympic arm wrestling champion. Though you wish someone had told you arm wrestling wasn't actually an Olympic sport _before_ you looked slightly lopsided.

Cameron: Just lie on the bench until someone comes by and you start going '151...152...153...154' before quickly dropping it back down as soon as their out of sight.

Meeks: Oppose the whole thing on principle. Your all for health but is it really necessary to lug weights in an attempt to bulk up somewhat unnaturally. Though, Knox pointed out your only saying that because you couldn't even do the 20 pound cable crossovers.

Pitts: Watch everyone struggle to try and jump on the chin-up bar. Though you had thought it was a towel bar or something, since it was at chest level.

**A.N. Dead Poets Society, the only thing that makes high school poetry units bearable. **

**-C**


	133. Dancing Queen

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 132: Dancing Queen**

How To Sing Karaoke Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Throw your hand in the air every time they call for volunteers. Their so shocked by you're willingness that you don't get picked. Which is actually probably for the better now that I'm thinking of it.

Todd: Pick a song that no one really knows the lyrics to, so you can mumble your way through, and just sing the chorus.

Charlie: Get both a standing ovation and thrown off the stage because about half way through you started to do a karaoke strip club combo.

Knox: Agree to go up under the condition that you don't go on fondu night. You're second degree cheese burns are still healing.

Cameron: Mock everyone who goes before you but attempt to get out of it by claiming the microphone is a breeding ground for germs.

Meeks: Spend your entire time explaining (to the karaoke version of 'Under Pressure') that Charlie singing 'Hey Stephen' has completely nothing to do with you. Because you're SteVen.

Pitts: Bring down the house with an emotion rendition of the American classic 'The ittsy, bittsy spider'. There wasn't a dry eye in the audience.

**A.N. Happy (American) Thanksgiving, please enjoy this completely non-related chapter. ****  
****-C**


	134. Ambush

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 133: Ambush**

How To Have A Snow War Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: TACKLE 'EM!

Todd: Come back inside surprisingly dry except for on your back, which causes everyone to question how long was Nail 'tackling' you for.

Charlie: Start the whole thing by stuffing snowballs down people's shirts and then ditch and hide out inside as soon as it gets serious.

Knox: In the spur of the moment break down the wall you built as defences to use as ammunition. Get upset over the tragic death of your beautiful ice castle later in private.

Cameron: Keep throwing dirty shots even after Knox called for a timeout so he could find his lost giraffe mitten. Though jokes on you when the game official commences and you're out of snowballs.

Meeks: Come up with an _actual_ formula for snowballs with the best speed, distance, and roundness. To bad by the time you're done the first one the war is already over.

Pitts: Ignore the combat and carnage going on around you and make a happy SnowElvis, complete with hand knitted rhinestone scarf.

**A.N. Now if only it would snow (and last longer than an hour). ****  
****-C**


	135. Take Centre Stage

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 134: Take Centre Stage**

How To Audition For A Play Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Run through your part with so much speed and enthusiasm that they actually have to hear you read it 3 times before they can even understand what you're saying.

Todd: End up over compensating for your soft voice by; TALKING. LOUDLY. AS. IF. EACH. WORD. WERE. IT'S. OWN. SENTENCE!

Charlie: Stand on the stage and smile. When the director asks if you're going to do anything reply that you're 'already doing it'.

Knox: Try and look professional by glancing offstage and going 'line!' when you get lost. Which, would have looked a lot better if you weren't holding a script in your hands.

Cameron: Keep misreading your lines which say 'Ay' as 'Eh' until the director is so feed up he asks you if you think this is supposed to be the Canadian version of Romeo & Juliet.

Meeks: Read through your lines so captivating and emotionally that the director was about to give you the part right on the spot. Or, he was until you added at the end 'I'm not feeling this, I really just want to be a Techie. Is that okay?'

Pitts: Spend a whole three minutes preparing to get into character and another five discussing what exactly your character's motivation is in this scene. Thing is, you're auditioning for Tree #2.

**A.N. I really wish we had gotten to see Neil's audition for the play, because I don't think he would have either auditioned or read for Puck right off the bat. I think he might have been placed to read for it later on in the process. ****  
**

**P.S. Sorry, this has a lack of Techies. I tried, but I know next to nothing about it, so I hope this is okay instead. **

**-C**


	136. Calorie Counting

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 135: Calorie Counting**

How To Go On A Diet Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Get kicked out of your diet support group when you admit you've been cheating a lot but have still managed to lose 2 pounds. Also known as about half of your body weight.

Todd: Go on an all orange juice diet. Which is really just a clever ruse to be able to drink all the orange juice that you want and no one will bug you about it. Or they weren't until the carotene levels in your skin got so high it made you look like you had a horrible tan.

Charlie: Attempt to start a thorough and strict healthy diet but quit completely when you realise that includes any foods you're likingly to be just licking them off someone.

Knox: Start eating those 100 calorie snack cakes and can't understand why after eating them for a week you've actually gained 2 pounds. Because no one explained to you it's not really helping that they're in small portions when you're eating 5 or 6.

Cameron: Start a reward system of 'Treat Thursday' when you're sticking to your diet plan. Though, this very quickly turns into treat Monday through Sunday.

Meeks: Start ordering more salad.

Pitts: Go on one of those crazy diet fads. Not because you really want to lose weight, but because you really dig cabbage juice.

**A.N. I just want to say the amount of updating that has been going on lately is phenomenal! You guys are amazing. Also, I don't even know why ANY of the Poets would be on a diet, especially Neil, but this was a fun chapter I wanted to do. **

**-C**


	137. Zip Code

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 136: Zip Code**

How To Pick Up The Mail Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Start sorting through your mail on that handy little table and end up reading everything because it's just so damn handy to read it then and throw it out as soon as possible.

Todd: Complain that you hate having to pick up your mail from a little gray box. Though when you see the Neilbox you start to reconsider the benefits of anonymous mail boxes.

Charlie: Go around sticking your key in other people's boxes to see if it'll open them too. (No, that was _not_ a sexual reference)

Knox: Start a collection of funky key-chains for your mail key. Though when you're having to take 2 or 3 minutes to sort through them all to find the actual key itself you start reconsidering if it was such a good idea.

Cameron: Go through the junk mail waste bin looking to see if anyone threw away a credit card offer or anything with personal information. Because you wouldn't want that falling into the wrong hands or anything.

Meeks: Start getting your packages delivered to your house when every time you go in to pick something up the person behind the desk goes 'Is Meeks your _real_ name?'.

Pitts: Yell and protest in outrage when the postal workers ask you to take down the decorations you've put on and around your mail box. They can take away your freedom but they can't take away your novelty glitter stickers.

**A.N. Guess who has winter holidays? Guess who'll be updating like crazy? AND, if you DON'T know what the Neilbox is you need to go look at Haykatsi's deviantart page right now. Seriously, go lookit that and then come back and review. But make sure you come back. **

**-C**


	138. Sensible Heels

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**For Rhyme, who loves her heels. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 137: Sensible Heels**

How To Go Shoe Shopping Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Talk the sales person into giving you all the left over shoeboxes from the display models so you can finally complete the ultimate shoebox fort.

Todd: From memory find the exact same pair in the same size and same price as the ones you're wearing right now.

Charlie: Start making bootlicker jokes at Cameron's expense before you even get inside the store. In your defence though you had been saving that material for years.

Knox: Find what's the basically the male version of the sexy red stiletto and have a little bit of a break down by the shoelace rack when you realise their a size too small.

Cameron: Switch around the pairs of shoes because you have two different sized feet completely angering the next person to buy a pair.

Meeks: Invent a new quick, easy and much more efficient way to tie your laces only to have the shoelace mob rush in, burn your work and silence you with a pair of diamond encrusted sneakers.

Pitts: Freak out the sales guy when he goes to measure your foot and it doesn't fit on the measuring thing. In fact they've actually had to create a new shoe size for you. Size GJP.

**A.N. Yes, the shoelace mob does exist. **

**-C**


	139. Curtain Call

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 138: Curtain Call**

How To Be In A Musical Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Spend a lot of time trying to 'capture the essence of your character' by breaking out in song and inserting your lines in your everyday situations. Though, writing them as answers on a chem test might have been taking it too far.

Todd: Audition to play 'Random Kid in Background #34' to gain some extra credit. Though apparently that role involves a, in your opinion, completely uncalled for and inappropriate 5 minute complex dance routine.

Charlie: Storm off the stage in a huff after yelling at the director for 3 minutes that, yes that _was_ the note you were singing thank you very much.

Knox: Practice your one solo line in a song so many times before the performance you develop acute vocal trauma from the strain.

Cameron: Spend a ridiculous amount of time going over your scales and getting anyone and everyone to listen your recording so you can gloat about your golden throat.

Meeks: Get bribed into playing a female role for a scene and a song for the privilege of doing sound work. Though, in the end it was still worth it, even if you had to wear a garter belt.

Pitts: Become severely disappointed that you won't be wearing any tights after Hopkins had commented that'd he'd be taking pictures of you prancing around in them.

**A.N. Oh 'How To' I've missed you. **

**-C**


	140. 314159

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 139: 3.14159**

How To Pass Math Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Doodle 'equations' in your notebook like Neil=Awesome, and T+N=3, and N+C=BFF 4EVA, which shockingly aren't considered 'real' equations even if the last one had the number 4 in it.

Todd: Pass the course with flying colours because you had one of those books the guy before wrote in all the answers before. Along with a few surprisingly accurate portraits of your math teacher's lip ferret.

Charlie: Become increasingly definent when you're asked to explain your thinking or how you figured out a problem. Start just saying "'Cause" and shrugging, because Charlie Dalton doesn't have to explain himself to anyone.

Knox: You weren't getting math actually, until you started replacing things in the questions with ones you were interested in. If you have 1 [Chris] and Peter has 16 [Chris'] how many [Chris'] do you have together? Math is the best.

Cameron: Through reading through your textbook (for fun) discover the answers are all in the back. A fact the teacher assumed no one would discover because who the hell reads their math textbook if they don't have to?

Meeks: To avoid having to explain your complex thinking try and make it sound as complex as possible so people will stop asking questions and leave you alone.

Pitts: Be the first guy ever to realise if you type in 0.7734 it says 'hello' when you turn it upsidedown. And hey, in many ways that's even better than a passing grade.

**A.N. Okay, I'm here with good news and bad news. The good news is, I'll be updating more frequently here on out. The bad news is I've decided that I'm going to be ending How To had 150 chapters. **

**Not because I don't love it or you guys anymore, just because it's becoming increasingly difficult to come up with new situations and I don't want this to go out limping. As well I really want to expand and work on other stuff. Who knows, maybe I'll actually do those one-shots for this I said I would ages ago. **

**(Please don't hate me)**

**-C**


	141. 7 Letters Down

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 140: 7 Letters Down**

How To Do A Crossword Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Once again start trying to do the crossword only to be constantly distracted by the comics on the bottom of the page. It's not your fault they put them right there where you can't ignore the wacky adventures of Calvin and Hobbes.

Todd: Get discouraged after 20 minutes of staring at the page and getting no where. Maybe you should just stick to word searches. Those are never that hard.

Charlie: Screw the clues completely and fill in the blanks with whatever the hell you like. Sticking it to the man crossword style.

Knox: Come up with some pretty creative ways of spelling Chris in order to fit it in every blank spot.

Cameron: Wait until the next week when the answers come out to finish the puzzle.

Meeks: You just put in the right answers to the clues. Simple. Or if your really looking for a challenge try and make it up as you go along and fit words into the grid.

Pitts: Get about halfway through and realize that the reason the whole thing wasn't working was because you were trying to do it on the sudoku grid.

**A.N. I don't owm Calvin and Hobbes. Just in case you were thinking I did for some reason. Sorry to get your hopes up. **

**-C**


	142. No Phones, No Lights, No Motorcars

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 141: No Phones, No Lights, No Motor Cars**

How To Survive On A Deserted Island Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Nominate yourself as leader because you've had Boy Scouts training in roughing it in the wild. You're only over thrown when you try and introduce mandatory sing along.

Todd: Nominate yourself to be incharge of building fires. And staring at the fire. And ocassionally throwing things into the fire. Things that maybe you shouldn't throw into the fire.

Charlie: Ditch any kind of notions of civilization within the first 10 minutes. Which is mostly likely just an excuse to stop wearing proper clothes and start using body paint on a more frequent basis.

Knox: Start talking to inanimate objects in order to stay sane. Though if that's your answer to avoiding insanity you might want to reconsidered your previous mental state.

Cameron: Go off and try and make your own camp. Partially because you want to do things your way and partially because Charlie said that if they have to resort to cannibalism you're going first.

Meeks: Try and tell Pitts that it's impossible to make a radio out of coconuts. Just because they did it on Gilligan's Island doesn't mean that it's true.

Pitts: Actually figure out how to make a radio out of coconuts. TV never lies.

**A.N. I don't know how Neil did it. He had a main role in a play, was running a secret organization, and somehow managed to keep his marks up. I'm a only doing a play and that's already a bit overwhelming. Anyways, it'll all be over soon. Expect more then. I hope. **

**-C**


	143. Alphabetical By Author

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 142: Alphabetical By Author**

How To Go To A Bookstore Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Look through the children's section for a quick walk down memory lane and end up having to be forcibly removed before you can discover they have a 'Book Castle'.

Todd: Take 15 minutes trying to decide which copy of a book to buy based on the different cover art. Because one appeals to you more, but one has more to do with the book itself. End up buying both so you won't hurt the books' feelings'.

Charlie: Lose all hope in the written word and maybe even in humanity itself, when you're told for the thrid consecutive time that there is no 'Semi-classy French porn' section.

Knox: Spend a week learning the dewey decimal system so you can locate things more easily only to find that they use that system but they don't actually label anything with the numbers. So basically, that's one week of your life you're never getting back.

Cameron: Go around shushing people. SHHHHHH!

Meeks: End up having to be escorted out of the store for yelling at people in the opinion section to stop being so goddamn pompous when they had to get all their ideas from other people.

Pitts: Become such a regular at the store that all the staff know you even though you've never actually bought a single book. You spend all your time looking through the random completely unrelated to books things they also sell like alarm clocks that run on water and air fresheners that smell like bacon.

**A.N. I BAAAAACK! The play went great and involved a gold cape with a red rhinestone lightning bolt I think Charlie would have been proud of. I can't wait to get back into fandom and hopefully fandom...uh, can't wait to go back into me? Something like that. **

**-C**


	144. King Of The Castle

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 143: King Of The Castle**

How To Go To The Park Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Insist that you get spun faster and faster and faster on the tire swing. Even after you had to get off and go puke in the bushes, you're only back for more.

Todd: Tell everyone you're stuck on top of the climber because your shoe got caught. Though in reality you don't want to climb down and are too stubborn to have anyone help you.

Charlie: Discover that underneath the equipment is the perfect make-out/hideout location. Well perfect if you don't mind getting sand in your hair...among other places.

Knox: Attempt to climb up the slide to impress all the little kids. Unfortunately kids were still trying to slide down when you were going up and all you impressed the kids with was how quickly you bruise.

Cameron: Accidentally on purpose stomp on an kid's sandcastle when his mom's not looking because he called your red hair stupid. You'll show him! You'll show them all!

Meeks: Finally stop trying to keep everyone under control after you get a _'I know how you feel' _look from a mother trying to wrangle her own children. You are _not_ anyone's mother.

Pitts: Refuse to go home until you manage to make it all the way over the top of the swing set. Physics symisics.

**A.N. A very happy birthday to both Neil and Shakespeare. Maybe they'd go to the park for their birthdays? ...I wish I had a picture of that. **

**-C**


	145. Please Hold

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 144: Please Hold**

How To Make A Phone Call Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Skip the formalities and jump straight into your conversation about how a lower case L and a capital I are really the same thing, only to discover you've dialed the wrong number.

Todd: Are secretly releaved and happy when you're put on hold so you can avoid talking to someone for as long as possible.

Charlie: Pretty typical phone conversations. Hi. How are you? What are you wearing?

Knox: Get nervous and call and hang up a few times to warm up. Only this has annoyed the other person to the point that they answer only so they can hang up on you.

Cameron: Refuse to believe that you've dialed the wrong number and keep insisting that the person you're talking to _is_ Mr. Roberts and this _is_ the right number.

Meeks: When the person on the other end answers and says 'hello?' launch straight into a lecture on how _actually_ you should say 'Ahoy' when you answer because that was what Bell wanted people to do and- Then they usually hang up on you.

Pitts: Make lots of very elaborate hand gestures to compliment what you are saying and then take the time to explain what types of hand gestures you're doing because clearly they can't _see _you.

**A.N. Ugh, so **_**somehow**_** I completely flubbed Neil and Shakespeare's birthday which is **_**actually **_**on April 23rd, which I knew but just...completely messed up for some reason. Thanks Splish92 for catching my mistake. **

**-C**


	146. BRAAAAAINS!

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 145: BRAAAAAINS!**

How To Survive The Zombie Apocalypse Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Name yourself leader and barricade everyone in Wal Mart, they may be a soul-sucking evil corporation but they have food, weapons, not to mention those Mega Packs of Peanut Butter Cups.

Todd: Turn out to be a total badass with a crossbow and a hunting rifle. Which may or may not be the hottest thing Neil has ever seen. Which may or may not cause him to ravish you in the frozen food section.

Charlie: Round up all men, women, and other to inform them that as humanity's last hope it is their duty, and by their you mean your duty, to repopulate the world. So you, better get right on that (literally).

Knox: Though you actually got bitten early on nobody noticed because your blank stares, and cries of 'CHRIIIIIIS!' were pretty much normal and nobody thought anything of it until you started nibbling on Hopkins.

Cameron: Actually allow yourself to get bitten early on and jump ship. You aren't stupid, you can tell that humanity doesn't really have a chance.

Meeks: Somehow despite your lack of medical knowledge, become nominated to find a cure for the 'Zombification'. Because developing a vaccine and wiring a crystla radio is _basically _the same thing right?

Pitts: Make friends with a bunch of zombies after discovering you have a mutual love of Rocky Horror Picture Show. When everyone else tell you that, that might not be a good idea tell them to stop being such zombiphobes.

**A.N. Thank you Mindy Morganna for inspiring this truly awesome chapter. ALSO! As I write this I have 1234 reviews, that is soooo cool. **

**-C**


	147. Cheat Sheet

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 146: Cheat Sheet**

How To Study For Exams Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: **HIGHLIGHT EVERYTHING! **So maybe it's not very helpful...or helpful at all, but it does make everything look more _exciting_!

Todd: Study like crazy for a month before exams because you were warned it would be difficult, only to discover you have a teacher with a cruel sense of humor who gave you a multiple choice exam where _every _answer is C.

Charlie: Oh ya, you've been studying alright, studying real hard, if you know what I mean. Who wants to join your study group?

Knox: Make cue cards, and flash cards, and fact lists, and anagrams, and a schedule, and...oh screw it you'll never study.

Cameron: Start snooping around and following teachers so you can discover how to better suck up to them. Because who needs to study when you're _this_ much of a kiss ass?

Meeks: After refusing to join Charlie's 'study group', because you really don't need to study, point out that that's also the euphemism you use for the club which makes it sound like you're all going into the woods to have orgies. No, that was not a suggestion.

Pitts: Make a sockpuppet show about the causes of World War I to help you study. Although, you were studying for a biology exam so you aren't exactly sure how that was supposed to help. Unless you need to know that sockpuppets bleed red yarn.

**A.N. Oh man, I'm kind of sad I didn't save my last chapter for later on so I wouldn't have to live up to it so much. I just hope this is good to, if not as epic. Also, appearently I have done two chapters on How To Make A Phone Call...uh, oops? I guess that's what happens when you're approaching 150 chapters. **

**-C**


	148. Would You Like Butter?

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 148: Would You Like Butter?**

How To Go To The Drive-In Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Get sent off the the playground to play with all the other children and end up having so much fun that you skip out on watching the movie.

Todd: Volunteer to go get everyone snacks, which you immediately regret after discovering you'll have to make at least ten trips between the car and the snack bar. By the time you're done you're so tired you fall asleep before the movie even started.

Charlie: Holy crap! They play _movies_ at the drive-in! You always thought it was just a place where you could park, buy snacks, and make-out. You never knew there were movies involved.

Knox: Decide that you're going to sitting in the back of a truck bed so you get all cozied up with blankets and pillows and snacks, only to discover about 5 minutes into the movie that you're facing the wrong way. The movie was still exciting though...at least it sounded exciting.

Cameron: You're forced to squeeze yourself in the trunk because according to Charlie it'll be cheaper, though really, you think it's because he wants to know if he murdered you he could easily stash the body.

Meeks: Get into rant with the guy who's in charge of putting the sound on the radio frequency that involves one death threat, two almost fist fights, more than a few declarations of true love, and a whole lot of technobabble. And this is only in the ten minutes before the movie starts.

Pitts: Bring your own pair of 3-D glasses. The movie's not in 3-D, but you'll look cool anyways.

**A.N. The drive-in near where I live sells pickled eggs at the refreshment stand. Because nothing says movie night like a pickled egg. **

**-C**


	149. Hello Smurf!

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 149: Hello Smurf!**

How To Do Stage Combat Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Become sadden when you're told you won't actually be using real swords, but cheer up rather quickly when you discover you'll instead be whacking people with wooden dowels.

Todd: Have such commitment to your dying that a few people actually come over and poke you with their sticks to make sure you're okay.

Charlie: Actually volunteer to teach about clothing grabs since you have so much experience which it, especially in the way of ties, collars, and jacket lapels.

Knox: Manage to somehow get a nosebleed from a _fake_ punch to the nose.

Cameron: After trying and failing to react to a non-contact kick, almost everyone offers to actually kick you so you can remember how to.

Meeks: Surprise almost everyone by getting really into the swordplay, especially in the way of swinging it over your head at your attacker and battle crying. Not surprisingly it's really hot.

Pitts: Refuse to 'Punch the Smurf' on your partner's shoulder because that is Smurf cruelty and you will have no part in it.

**A.N. So I'm back from Shakespeare School, it was great and I learned a lot. The moment we started doing stage combat I knew that more than anything I wanted to see the Poets doing it and this was born. **

**-C**


	150. Say Cheese!

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 149: Say Cheese!**

How To Take A Photograph Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Climb up onto various different objects, crouch down, lie on your stomach, hell climb on top of the person you can get a different and unexpected angle for the picture.

Todd: Offer to take as many photos as possible. Become foiled in your plan though when Neil points out you can put it on a timer so you can be in all the pictures too. _Oh goodie_.

Charlie: Spend a lot of time giving orders ridiculous from behind the camera. Yes! You're a tiger! Rawr! More pout! You've got dynamite in your pants! Show me! Take it off! Ow! Or...uh, leave it on, your choice.

Knox: Desperately try to take photos of yourself that don't look like you're trying to take pictures of yourself because that would be both vain and stupid. Also for some god awful reason take them in the bathroom because there's nothing classier than that.

Cameron: Wait just a _little_bit too long before taking the photo so everyone has been holding there smiles in a way that looks just a little uncomfortable and strained.

Meeks: Spend 15 minutes tinkering with the settings so you can get the perfect shot but by the time you get it just right everyone has gotten tired of standing around and left. Which is why most of the photos you end up taking are of inanimate objects that can't walk away from you.

Pitts: Jump out of bushes and take shots of people when they're not expecting it so you get 'natural' looking shots. Though apparently a lot of people look really scared 'naturally'.

**A.N. Oh my GOODNESS. Only one more chapter. I don't know about you guys but I'm terrified in the best way possible. Also, how is it possible that I haven't done a chapter on this already? It seems very obvious now but I'm almost 99.99% sure I haven't done this one yet. If I have...well than it's part 2. **

**-C**


	151. WIP

**Disclaimer: If I owned DPS everyone would have done the Timewarp at the end. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 150: WIP**

How To Write Fanfiction Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Feel the compulsive need to write and updating a couple thousand words every few days. Which would make everyone hate you if everything you wrote wasn't so damn good.

Todd: Become the ninja writer who only posts in the middle of the night every once in a blue moon which only makes everyone love you more for your mysteriosity.

Charlie: Pair yourself up with everyone just to give it a try. Original Characters? Why not. Meeks? He'd try anything once. Cameron? You know what, if it'll elevate your Sex God status you'd do it. Literally.

Knox: Refuse to stray from your OTP because anything else would be like _cheating_. (Your OTP may or not be McAllistair/Keating.)

Cameron: Start an epically awesome epic. And then _never_ update it. MWAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAH! Yours is an evil laugh!

Meeks: Why write fic when you can just point out the character development or canon-ness with facts and fancy sounding literary terms. And if that doesn't work you can always just rant at them about your right-ness.

Pitts: Who needs fancy stories with character development, and paragraphs, and dialogue. You could always just get your point across with witty to the point observations on a certain theme.

**A.N. ...Authors you know who you are. (I love you all I really do.) Also THANK YOU. Yes, YOU. **

**Uh, so yes Chapter 150 and after much serious angsting and deliberating this will not be the end of How To. (Pause for assorted high-fiving, fist pumping, and cheering) BUT! Since I really was serious about wanting to finish up other assorted projects and maybe start some new ones so How To might go a bit on the backburner. Can we all be cool with that? **

**-C**

**P.S. Oh and How To oneshots, are people still interested in that? I'd still be game but I want to gage the interest. **


	152. Pizza Tokens

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 151: Pizza Tokens**

How To Spend Your Lunch Hour Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: You don't actually get to use your hour for what it was meant for, namely lunch, because you're too busy rushing from student council to honors society to baking cookies for the homeless. Because you're Neil freakin' Perry: Golden Boy Extraordinaire.

Todd: Hide out in the library so you can get some work done. To avoid human distractions take up an entire table and four chairs with your things which of course everyone else takes as meaning you were dibbing the table for them.

Charlie: Cruise around the school in what is basically just a giant lap, but doing so pretending you're off somewhere with great purpose. Really though, you aren't fooling anyone especially when you've passed by for the eighth time.

Knox: Stand awkwardly around the entrance to the mess hall because you don't want to have to go sit down by yourself like a loner while you wait for your friends to get their. Though standing in the doorway does make you look like a creepy door-loomer and that may not be much better.

Cameron: Volunteer for mess monitoring duty so you can get the cheap thrill of having a slight authority over everyone else. Even though that authority mostly consists of yelling at first years to eat their vegetables and avoiding getting hit in the back of the head with spoon catapulted food.

Meeks: Use your hour as a golden opportunity to sneak into the science labs and "borrow" equipment for your "science experiments" while all the teachers are distracted by mashed potatoes. Who says nerds can't be rebels too?

Pitts: As soon as the bell rings run as quickly as you can to the mess knocking over innocent underclassmen so you can get in line first. Normally you're a pretty chill guy but Taco Day is not something to be taken lightly.

**A.N. So, One-shots are go like Thunderbirds. I'm going to say look out for that coming early December (or Hanukkah time if you prefer) so in the mean time I have to finish my 25 prompts and 10 Things. Oh and of course updating How To. So hopefully it will be an update-tastic fic filled fall. **

**-C**


	153. Waffling

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 152: Waffling**

How To Do Improv. Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Try and formulate the most outlandish situations and settings possible and then get upset when no one can understand what is happening. You're a retired robo-cop with a limp trying to babysit aliens in Texas. Couldn't you tell?

Todd: Work out a strategy of adding so many character, setting, and situation ideas that no one can accuse you of not participating and force you to act for anything.

Charlie: Wait until the people up are in the most compromising, uncomfortable, or flat out sexual positions before calling out freeze. Then spend an unusually long time deciding which position you want to fill so you can 'survey it from all angles.'

Knox: Act out the same thing with a very slight variation everytime. Though technically everytime what you really are is a one trick pony in disguise.

Cameron: Cheat by preplanning scenarios and writing them on the inside of your arm so you can subtly look at them when you can't come up with anything. Which would have been a fantastic strategy were you not wearing a jacket over a long sleeved sweater over a long sleeved collared shirt.

Meeks: Surprise almost everyone by being a total improv BEAST. Somehow manage to come up with a new completely non-sexual scenario everytime Charlie ends up on top of you. Now that's impressive.

Pitts: Walk through through imaginary doors iniciated in the scene without opening them. When called out on it simply explain that your character had super strength and the others in the scene were at fault for not acknowledging it.

**A.N. In my English class today my teacher said that second-person doesn't really exist as a narrative form. I was really angry about it but I couldn't exactly say 'My fanfic is in second person!' to prove my point.**

**-C**


	154. Snowball!

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 153: Snowball**

How To Go To A School Dance Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Dance around goofily with people during the slow songs just to be a nonconformist. Too bad everyone else seems to be doing that too.

Todd: Get forced into dancing a pseudo-tango with Neil that starts with a dip and ends with a concussion.

Charlie: Think that this finally may be your chance to 'grab somma that' until you find out that teachers are actually measuring to make sure anyone dancing has 3 feet of space between them. Now the best you can hope for is some shoulder action.

Knox: Duck and cover when you hear someone shout snowball. When you realise it just means that you have to switch dance partners...you still; duck and cover.

Cameron: Hang out just outside the girls bathroom so you get first dibs on the girls who are shy, just got dumped, feel fat, or never get asked to dance. You consider it a social service.

Meeks: Offer to sell refreshments so you won't have to dance and make a fool of yourself. Instead you get hyped up on diet coke and make a fool of yourself.

Pitts: Try and get everyone doing a single choreographed dance. It's too hard to teach anyone anything over the music though so you end up just getting everyone to jump up and down in sync.

**A.N. I'm **_**pretty**_** sure I haven't done a school dance one before. You know you have a lot of chapters when you have to check before you write anything to make sure you haven't done it already. **

**-C**


	155. Checkered Flag

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 154: Checkered Flag**

How To Go Go-Carting Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Try and convince Todd that these are special British go-carts and if he lets you sit on the left you'll be in the passenger seat. Surprisingly he's not convinced, especially because the wheel is on the left side.

Todd: Go doubles with Neil, though you're pretty sure that having to steer is only very slightly less terrifying that having Neil drive

Charlie: Ask if instead of driving you can fill in as the sexy girl waving the start flag. Well not the sexy _girl_, the sexy _hunk of man_.

Knox: Sign off on a bunch of forms which you assume say that protect you in case you get hurt but are actually to protect the go-carts, track, employees and related equipment. Apparently you've developed a bit of a reputation.

Cameron: Completely obliterate everyone else. Why is everyone so surprised that you're good at something not bootlicking. Well maybe good at it isn't the right word, especially considering your competition.

Meeks: Decide you're going to increase your chances of winning by making your cart more streamlined, totally re hauling the engine, and painting on some flames just because they look cool. By the time your finished you have a sweet ride, but the race had ended. Three days ago.

Pitts: Set up an impromptu sound booth so you can do colour commentary live on the scene in full headset and suit. Though no one is quite sure where you got the sound equipment, or a checkered blazer for that matter.

**A.N. Dear House (The show not the guy), Thank you for doing my work so I don't have to. xoxoxox**

**-C**


	156. Dip Dip and Swing

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 155: Dip Dip and Swing**

How To Go Canoeing Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Let the power of getting to sit in the back and give steering instruction go to your head when you demand everyone start calling you Captain Neil.

Todd: Tip the canoe accidentally on purpose after the 14th time Neil calls you Ensign Todd. Because you'd be a lieutenant _at least_.

Charlie: Make a lot of really bad jokes about stroking and how your an old practice while the instructor is going over safety guidelines. End up falling into the water before you even got into the canoe because you weren't paying attention on how to get into the canoe.

Knox: Get stuck behind the instructor while giving a demonstration on how _not _to swing a paddle, and become a walking example of the fatal results when they break your nose.

Cameron: Complain that your butt is wet, and your feet are wet, and your hands are wet until your entire crew decides to use their paddles to splash you. So at least you're not uneven anymore.

Meeks: Get left behind when everyone insists that with your colour hair you simply _cannot _wear a red lifejacket and they don't have them in any other colours.

Pitts: Get forced to sit on the bottom of the canoe because your legs are so long that if you sit on the seat you'll unbalance the canoe, which you always thought was part of the fun. First the unbalancing then the falling in the water. It's your favourite part.

**A.N. I went on the Canoe Trip From Hell today, as it shall be known from now on. I wrote this in my head while being splashed and verbally abused by boys who didn't even know my name, mostly so I wouldn't turn around and whack them all upside the head with a paddle. **

**-C**


	157. Captain Plasma

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 156: Captain Plasma**

How To Donate Blood Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Try and go back 3 or 4 times to give blood but apparently your trying to better society is a 'danger to yourself'.

Todd: Have several people congratulate you on being a Universal Donor, probably because they didn't know what that meant and it sounded fancy.

Charlie: Beg or rather macho-ly demand that everyone come with you, not because you need the support it's just a little needle and some blood after all, but because you wouldn't want them to worry.

Knox: Decide to donate blood because you know, as a chronic nosebleeder that blood saves lives. Usually yours. In fact right after you donate the nurse says they'll set it aside for you next time you need it.

Cameron: Once you've discovered that you and Charlie are the same blood type demand that they put in your file you should not be given his blood at any cost. You have no idea what could be floating around in there.

Meeks: Tell the people running the clinic that the pamphlets they had out are a sham, there is absolutely no correlation between blood-type and personality. Who are they trying to fool?

Pitts: Go back with Neil several times, not because you want to help people but because they gave you a really cool sticker for donating. It's Captain Plasma!

**A.N. If anyone was wondering I'm O+**

**-C**


	158. Funsized

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 157: Funsized **

How To Give Out Halloween Candy Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Give everyone giant hand fulls of candy so you can been known as the house that gives lots of candy. Unfortunately that reputation will only be known by about 5 people since you ran out so quickly.

Todd: Hand candy out in the early evening when all the cute little kids come around and then bolt your door and hide when it gets later and all the teenagers show up. Because even though you're 'one of them' they still terrify you.

Charlie: Refuse to give out any candy to teenagers who simply draw on their face and put a hat on. Not because you think it's a bad costume but because _that's your thing_!

Knox: What do you mean hand out candy? You're going out! No! 18 is _not_ to old to go trick or treating!

Cameron: Promise your parents you can handle giving out candy to little brats in costumes. Give out a couple of hand fulls then shut off your porch light and eat the rest before getting violently ill an hour later. Karma is a bitch.

Meeks: Be that awesome guy who hands out stickers, but you're convinced everyone's being sarcastic when they go; 'Wow! Stickers!'

Pitts: Accidentally fall asleep while sitting on your porch and have a kid come up and kick you to see if you're going to jump out at them or if you're just a dummy. End up shrieking macho-ly and dumping candy everywhere.

**A.N. I would like to take this opportunity to apologize to that guy I kicked last year to see if he was a real person. I'm sincerely sorry about kicking you in the calf, I hope you can forgive me. **

**-C**


	159. Time For Change

**Disclaimer: I own nothing but the ideas...and your soul. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 158: Time For Change**

How To Vote Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Tell everyone you're voting for one person, praise them night and day for a week and a half. And then vote for the other guy, because you're edgy like that.

Todd: After a half hour of painful deliberation check off everyone on the ballot because you don't want to leave anyone out.

Charlie: Psssssh, you're not just voting you're running! By which of course you mean you're writing Captain Nuwanda Sexypants III on your ballot, which completely isn't a waste of your vote. No matter what Meeks says.

Knox: Get panicked over which is the right answer and copy off Charlie.

Cameron: Say you're voting for whomever the person or people you're with at the moment say you're voting for. Which makes it really hard to choose when it's just you alone in a booth.

Meeks: Somehow end up with a satisfaction survey from a fast food restaurant instead of a ballot.

Pitts: Get as many buttons and stickers from as many different candidates as possible, because you don't want anyone to feel left out.

**A.N. We just had municipal elections, the States just had elections, other places have elections. It seemed fitting. **

**-C**

**P.S. Happy (Belated) Birthday Toddikins. **


	160. Checkmate

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 159: Checkmate**

How To Play Chess Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Attempt to face it rather than admit that you don't know how to play chess. It's just like checkers, right?

Todd: Turns out you're some secret chess ninja back from your days at Balincrest. In fact they called you The Chess Ninja.

Charlie: Try to turn the whole thing it into a drinking game, which quite quickly progresses into strip chess. Checkmate baby.

Knox: Show up in full protective gear. Just because chess isn't a contact sport doesn't mean there aren't many opportunities for injury if you aren't prepared. You could smash your hand too hard on the timer, you could get a sliver from a poorly made piece which could then become infected. The dangers are limitless.

Cameron: Come in dead last despite claiming to have spent 3 summers at chess camp. Which sucks especially because you lost to a guy who doesn't know how to even play chess.

Meeks: Manage to lose to Charlie. Who's been playing the drinking version. Or the strip version. It's never quite clear why Charlie starts taking his shirt off.

Pitts: Give all your pieces distinct personalities and voices so you can enact their bloody 'deaths'. Most of which seem to involve explosions and/or car-chases.

**A.N. I don't know how to play chess but I think I would learn just for the sake of playing strip chess with Charlie. **


	161. Speedbump

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 160: Speedbump**

How To Drive Like A Dead Poet:

Neil: Do the checklist. Seatbelt, mirrors, seat, ect, very cautiously and meticulously. Then completely gun it as soon as you get out of the driveway.

Todd: Hide your car and deny that you own one because you don't want the whole 'aerodynamic' thing to become a traditional fate for all of your birthday presents.

Charlie: Completely obliterate the course quite literally. Yet manage to walk away with a license after flirting with the instructor for a few minutes. And people say flattery gets you nowhere.

Knox: Attempt to jump into the drivers seat through the window with very, very bad consequences.

Cameron: Learn everything you need to know about driving by simply going down your driveway. Because you're so wealthy that your driveway is _that_ long. It even has it's own stoplight.

Meeks: Get the oldest, lamest, ugliest car you can find. Because with friends like these you know it's going to end up a) driven off a cliff b) driven into the lake or c) Have had sex in the backseat without your knowledge within a few weeks anyways.

Pitts: Completely gun it wherever you go. Not because you're trying to show off but because you've heard that if you get up to 88 mph you can travel through time!

**A.N. You know Pitts would totally own a DeLorean. They are stylin'! **


	162. Due Date

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 161: Due Date**

How To Do A Project Last Minute Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Get it all done with a few days to spare before going completely crazy on the night before it's due and decide you must redo the whole thing because it isn't _perfect_.

Todd: Lock yourself in a bathroom stall for 12 hours with only a notebook, a pencil, and a large canteen of orange juice. It's serious business time.

Charlie: Procrastinate so long that you are forced to swoon dramatically on your way to breakfast on the due day so you can get a slip from the nurse and attempt to throw something together.

Knox: Dude what project?

Cameron: Turn into a complete hyperventilating nervous mess because you've put it off too long and you only have _two weeks_ left to finish it. And everyone knows you need at least three weeks to properly suck up to a teacher, maybe even a month if you want to do it right.

Meeks: Throw together what is essentially an angry rant about everything your teacher has done wrong in teaching the subject. Get top marks for it with comments like 'I couldn't agree more!'.

Pitts: Pull out the old finger puppets and tell a dramatic recreation of your life story.

**A.N. Oh man, I am so sorry I haven't been updating...at all. I had a great (but very busy) holiday and now I'm in the pre-exam crunch time as I'm sure many of you lovely people are to. I hope this How To can tide you over until I have the time to be working properly on more fic. **

**-C**


	163. Jazz Hands!

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 162: Jazzhands! **

How To Be in a Glee Club Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Get grumpy and threaten to quit after one to many people call you a Gleek, that is a serious Shakespearean insult people! Also, why do you keep getting asked if your name is Blaine?

Todd: Spend an unneccesary ammount of time on having your dance moves in sync with the person in front you of so you'll be completely hidden behind them at all times.

Charlie: Demand that you alone get to choreograph all numbers, that way you can in tons of claw hands and sexy faces in as you can, well as many as you can in 'Bridge over Troubled Water'.

Knox: Become the 'Club Mascot' after some ill-timed dance moves destroy a baby grand piano and land four people in the emergency room.

Cameron: You're just hear because they needed 12 members. (Or at least that's what you tell people).

Meeks: Get dragged into this whole ordeal after being heard singing in your room. Everyone was so enthusiastic you didn't have the heart to tell them that it had actually been a song on the radio.

Pitts: Fall so in love with the idea that you're attempting to get spontanious yet choerographed musical numbers to happen more often. But so far it just results in you singing in the lunch line and everyone else shuffling two steps away.

**A.N. Happy? **

**-C**


	164. Don't Rain On My Parade

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 163: Don't Rain On My Parade**

How To Be In A Parade Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Get assigned to holding the banner for the marching band because despite all of your enthusiasm you couldn't play a musical instrument if your life depended on it.

Todd: Beg to be assigned to Meeks' float.

Charlie: Demand that you get to drive the cool vintage convertable, no way you're going to be stuck sitting in the backseat waving. You're enthusiasm is somwhat dampened however when you discover you're only going to be going 10 miles an hour.

Knox: Somehow fall through a gap in the floor of the float. Not only do you badly scrape your leg but now you're stuck there for the rest of the parade.

Cameron: Refuse to have anything to do with such silly things as parades after you don't win Fire Chief for the day and don't get to ride in the firetruck and honk the horn.

Meeks: Fill your float so completely full of awesome scenary and special effects that in the end there isn't any room to put any people on it.

Pitts: Ask if you can hand out candy to the kids because you like making people happy. Well that's half true because keeping half of the candy does make you happy.

**A.N. So sorry about the lack of updates, I've been sort of busy with getting Dead Sexy Society started (which you should go read if you haven't already by the way) and I've neglected my beloved How To. **

**-C**

**P.S. Knox's actually happened to me, luckily it wasn't during the parade however. **


	165. Happiest Man Alive

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 164: Happiest Man Alive**

How To Propose Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Plan a big production of it, the family and friends all gathered round, a string quartet, flowers and champagne. You're down on your knee pouring your heart out before you realize you've forgotten to bring the ring. Improvise with a twist tie. Hey it worked in middle school didn't it?

Todd: Have a very awkward conversation after they misheard you when you asked if they wanted to get marinara sauce.

Charlie: Tell them that you have Friday afternoon off if they want to get married or something as casual as possible. Though really you've been fretting about the whole thing for months.

Knox: Get the wrong sized ring and spend most of the engagement party trying to get it off before it finally gives and you whack yourself in the face.

Cameron: Accidentally get her hopes up when you go to give her a pair of earrings in a velvet box that all of a sudden everyone in the resturant is looking at you and you have to do it.

Meeks: Claim that the whole idea of marriage as a ridiculous sham created by the church in cahoots with the jewellery industry to make everyone buy two rings they don't need, but, you guess you could take Friday off.

Pitts: Write several different speeches, not because you're nervous but because you really want to use the phrase 'I liked it so I put a ring on it' and things like that need to have proper planning.

**A.N. Thanks to EB for the idea which I thought was so cute it made me go 'awwwww' and rush immediately to go write it. On a funny side note the play I was in last year had a moment where one of the characters was supposed to say 'will you be my steady?' but accidentally he said 'will you marry me?' during one of the shows. Oops. **

**-C **


	166. Who's Dewey?

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 165: Who's Dewey? **

How To Go To The Library Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Yell at the reference computer when it tells you that there are no works of Tennyson at this location. And they call this a library! They should be ashamed of themselves!

Todd: Make your usual silence even quieter due to your paramount fear of mean librarians, who therapists will trace as your original cause of quietness.

Charlie: Get into an argument when you're not allowed to take out anything because you apparently have several hundred dollars worth of fines from a book you took out when you were six.

Knox: After getting your hand stuck in the return shoot you realize that the library was open and you could have just taken your things to the front desk an option which most likely would have left you with all of your fingernails.

Cameron: Glare at anyone who dares cough, or quietly converse meanwhile you carry on conversations at a normal level of volume.

Meeks: Become distracted by the horrible layout of the library and start drawing up a schematic of a more efficient shelving system. And let's not even get into the flawed understanding of the dewey decimal system they use.

Pitts: Get kicked out after you get caught walking around balancing the encyclopedia's on your head. What? Nothing's sexier than good posture.

**A.N. This was one of the chapters where I was really worried that I had already written it before. I know I did a bookstore one but if I've done library before I guess this is just round 2. Also if anyone gets the title reference you win at life. **

**-C **


	167. 10 000 Pieces

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 166: 10 000 Pieces**

How To Do A Jigsaw Puzzle Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Sort your pieces by colour when anyone is looking, pull out the scissors and get sniping as soon as they turn away. It's not cheating, it's being creative.

Todd: Becoming increasingly paranoid that Neil ate one of your puzzle pieces when your missing one solely on the fact that it happened in Curious George.

Charlie: Reserve the right to just leave the goddamn puzzle in a puddle because those things are trying to force you into conformity. And _not_ just because you couldn't do it.

Knox: Loose so many of the pieces in the process that all you end up with is a few edge pieces and what looks like it might be an eye.

Cameron: Take a really complicated picture and draw on the lines for the pieces after which works great until you try to take it apart.

Meeks: Do it upsidedown because it's too easy if you get to actually see the picture.

Pitts: Somehow manage to get it done even though Charlie has been swapping out pieces from other puzzles to mess with you.

**A.N. Okay, this is going to be (probably) the last update for a few weeks while I'm at camp. Don't get into too much trouble while I'm gone. **

**-C **


	168. War Paint

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 167: War Paint**

How To Play Paintball Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Come up with an intricate plan that includes double crossing, triple crossing, elaborate makeup, bird calls, special effects, ten yards of rope with knots tied in it, and a lady's sunhat. Then decide it's way more fun to just scream warrior calls.

Todd: Turn out to be some sort of secret paintball BAMF, completely annihilating everyone on the team with your ninja like stealth. Quietness has it's advantages.

Charlie: Switch teams when you're stuck with Cameron. Switch back when you realize that just means you can shoot him as much as you want and he won't get out.

Knox: Somehow manage to shoot yourself in the face, you didn't end up getting a nosebleed from it but you were on the red team so it looks like you've got one anyways.

Cameron: Curse everyone and stomp off in a huff when you have just as many hits from your own team as you do from the opposing one.

Meeks: Somehow end up playing with some other team entirely because honestly everyone looks exactly the same in camouflauge.

Pitts: Spend most of your time executing spectacular dives and rolls that any super spy would be proud of so by the end of the game you haven't even been hit once. But you also haven't hit anyone else either.

**A.N. Thanks to both Thyme and supernaturalgleefreak for the inspriation for this chapter. I'm actually a huge wimp who has never played paintball before but I'm sure it'd have been something like this. **

**-C **

**P.s. Oh also I updated the How To Shots if you missed that. **


	169. Girls! Girls! Girls!

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 168: Girls! Girls! Girls! **

How To Go To A Strip Club Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Have a very lengthy discussion with the dancers about their characterization methods and whether or not they believe in stage names.

Todd: Plan on hiding in the bathroom before realizing their are less sexual acts going on in cages than their are in the bathroom.

Charlie: Make the mistake of refering to yourself as Nuwanda and mentioning you've got a lightning bolt painted on your chest, prompting the manager to drag you back stage and tell you you've got 5 minutes before you're on.

Knox: Ask if instead of a lap dance you can have a slow head on the shoulders dance because even though you're ready for the third base of dancing you want to save going all the way (dance-wise) for someone special.

Cameron: Please, you'd never go to a _strip club_. Though you have gone to a gentlemen's club once, or fifteen times. But there's a difference!

Meeks: Between Charlie and a strangely attractive robot themed stripper you're completely broke by the end of the night.

Pitts: Buy some time in the champagne room with a girl named Candi when she says you can play some games. Leave in a huff when you discover she doesn't even have Battleship or Monopoly.

**A.N. This is all Corky's fault. **

**-C**


	170. Different Drummer

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 169: Different Drummer**

How To Learn An Instrument Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Focus on your hair, a cool stage name and finding some tight leather pants, because that's what being a musician is really about.

Todd: Learn quickly that being quiet has it's advantages when you want to learn how to play something. Get so good that you only have to hear something once or twice to play it.

Charlie: Take up the saxophone, not because you're rebellious but because you accidentally broke your beloved clarinet when you sat on it. Though saying your fighting the man with music sounds much better.

Knox: Pick the triangle to master because you're pretty sure that you can't hurt yourself with a triangle. Or rather you won't hurt yourself _too_ badly.

Cameron: It's like whistling, you only have to think it in your head and it comes out perfectly. Only you never really learned how to whistle.

Meeks: Stumble your way through learning Mary Had a Little Lamb on the recorder in the 5th grade a swear to never pick up a musical instrument ever again.

Pitts: Get really into the acronyms start trying to come up with your own. Eat Good Bacon Daily Friends. Who needs music when you have the magic of acronyms.

**A.N. Mmmm, tight leather pants. **

**-C**


	171. Baby on Board

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 170: Baby on Board**

How To Learn To Drive Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Blame your complete lack of talent on the fact that the configuration of the car is more favourable to people who are right handed. Find a new excuse when you still can't drive in non-North American car.

Todd: Misunderstand the notion of 'ten and two' so that you attempt to turn without moving your hands. On the plus side though you never really liked those bushes anyways.

Charlie: Have your one good childhood memory of your father come to a horrible shattering end when you realise that there is no button for flying on the car and it does not actually have retractable wings like you always thought.

Knox: Fail your first drivers exam because you stop to pick up a hitchhiker halfway through the test. Ironically the problem isn't that he's a hitchhiker it's that you're not supposed to have passengers that are unrelated.

Cameron: Driving? You mean that thing rich people pay others to do for them? Ya. You're not doing that.

Meeks: Get stuck learning in your grandmothers old car, which smells weird and rides so low that you have to sit on a phonebook just to see over the dashboard. And just when you were starting to get over your height issues.

Pitts: Find that your main problem is staying focused, like everytime you see a cresent all you can think about is croissants. Mmmmmm, croissants...

**A.N. So, I'm learning how to drive and what better way to review what (not) to do than write fanfiction?**

**-C**


	172. Allen Key

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 171: Allen Key**

How To Build Something From IKEA Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Actually do a pretty good job. Until you realize you still have two screws left and fly into a complete panic. Because everyone knows they _never _give you extra pieces.

Todd: Somehow get the store manager to give you the display copy. You like to think it was because you're cute though and not because they thought you wouldn't be able to make it yourself.

Charlie: Throw a half completed bookshelf on the ground in a huff when someone suggests you look like the little cartoon man in the instruction booklet. Which would have been much more effective if you hadn't have dropped it on your own foot.

Knox: Get delegated the reading the instructions because nobody trusts you to you a screwdriver. It's extra pathetic because IKEA instructions don't even have words.

Cameron: You were out the minute you realized this was furniture you had to put together yourself.

Meeks: After you've finished call up the company. Not because you had any real problems putting it together because you saw some glaring design flaws and have some suggestions.

Pitts: Throw out the instructions. That stuff is like lego you can just put it together in whatever order you want. Probably.

**A.N. Thank you Sweden for your reaonably priced shelving units. Also your meatballs and like half of all ABBA songs. **

**-C**


	173. I'm Not as Think as You Drunk I Am

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 172: I'm Not As Think As You Drunk I Am **

How To Get Drunk Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Rope everyone else into playing a drinking game where you have to take a shot if you use your right hand to drink with. Being left-handed does have it's advantages.

Todd: Avoid getting too hammered because last time that happened you're pretty sure you composed some of the most brilliant sonnets since Shakespeare. This was only bad because instead of writing them down you stood on a table and yelled them at Neil. Which is fair since they were mostly about him anyways.

Charlie: Despite having a very extensive and expensive liquor cabinet within easy acquistion opt to instead get a fake ID and buy crappy stuff like everyone else because it's not rebellious to get wasted if it's easy.

Knox: Somehow despite being totally and completely drunk manage to be more corrodinated than you would usually be stone cold sober.

Cameron: Make a complete fool of yourself dancing on the table after Charlie slips something into your drink. However the thing he slipped in your drink was actually just gingerale.

Meeks: Get not so much drunk as just really obnoxious after a few glasses of wine. However this obnoxiousness seems to be mostly directed at people who think Marconi invented the radio.

Pitts: Accidentally eat an entire tray of jello shots before realizing that there may be more than red dye number two and artifical flavouring in them.

**A.N. Thanks so much to the lovely KittyCalum for the suggestion, I had a blast writing this chapter. If you ever have any suggestions don't be shy to let me know your ideas. **

**-C**


	174. Heads Down Go Around

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 173: Heads Down Go Around**

How To Play Heads Up Seven Up Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Cheat by crossing your arms on the edge of your desk and putting your head down on them so you can see the shoes of the person who taps you. This would work a lot better if you went to a school which didn't have regulation footwear.

Todd: Keep picking the only person who couldn't have chosen you because they weren't even up last round so you never have to go up.

Charlie: Use this as an excuse to get some of your agression out smacking people in the head anonomously, or not so anonomously as you only ever do it to Cameron.

Knox: Attempt to use some reverse psychology by pointing to yourself everytime your chosen person has to guess. Which is only a good strategy, you quickly learn, if you don't do it everytime.

Cameron: Refuse to play because you spend a lot more time on your hair than people realize and you're not letting a stupid game mess it up.

Meeks: Use a series of lie detecting techniques you say you got out of books but really you learned watching old cop movies to deduce which person tagged you. Though usually you can tell without all those fancy techniques because you don't tend to play with people who are very good at concealing their emotions.

Pitts: Quickly realize that dissolving into giggles whenever someone you picked looks at you isn't the best strategy in the world. Though it is at least better than Knox's.

**A.N. Thanks again to KittyCalum for a convo which inspired this chapter. If you don't know what Heads Up Seven Up is you should google how to play because it is awesome (also this chapter will make a lot more sense). **

**-C**


	175. Cole's Notes

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 174: Cole's Notes **

How To Read A Book For School Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Briefly flip through the book so you know the gist of the plot. Then make up random details to fill in the blanks. If you play it right the teacher will just assume they forgot these things and you won't get caught.

Todd: Just write some stuff about nonconformity and social pressures, every single book they shove on you in school is basically about the same things. It's especially awkward because it seems to relate pretty well to your life.

Charlie: Just convince someone in the year above to tell you what the book's about and let you look at their work. Sometimes this takes as much work as actually reading the book yourself.

Knox: Try, really and truly try and make it through the book. You never manage to make it past the first 20 pages but write responses that are so vague and confusing that your teacher never realizes.

Cameron: Read the whole thing twice and take detailed notes as well as reading several essays written by respected literary anaylists.

Meeks: Read it and make a list of any obvious thematic quotes, most books just assume you're stupid and won't catch the theme unless they tell you what it is. You may not be stupid that doesn't mean you can't use it to your advantage.

Pitts: Watch the movie instead. Which works fine until you start refering to the character not by their name but by the actor who played them. It really falls apart however when the movie has a different ending than the book.

**A.N. Hey guys, so I have a question, I wrote a Hunger Games AU type fic for DPS, but I have no idea how much (if any) crossover their is between those fandoms. Would anyone be interested in reading it? You can let me know in a review or a PM, if you have any questions feel free to ask. Thanks guys! **

**-C**


	176. A New Year, A New You

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 175: New Year, A New You**

How To Make New Year's Resolutions Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Come up with a whole strategic plan on how you're going to pull off your amazing resolution only to completely forget about it by January 5th.

Todd: Don't make any specific resolutions because you think they put a lot of pressure on the whole situation. Ironically end up accomplishing more things than anyone else.

Charlie: Write yourself a letter of hopes and dreams for the new year. And then burn it! Because setting things on fire makes any activity more fun!

Knox: Announce some ridiculous resolution at about 3 in the morning which you've managed to completely forget by the time your drag yourself out of bed on January 2nd. Which is really weird because you weren't drunk or anything.

Cameron: Make a resolution you've actually already completed so you can start off your year feeling accomplished.

Meeks: Whatever you decide to make your resolution the most important thing is that it is in checklist form. Because there is nothing in the world that motivates you more than being able to check something off of a list.

Pitts: Decide this is the year to finally learn how to make paper cranes, and get totally ripped, and fly a plane, a get a girlfriend, and get over your fear of balloon animals, and get straight A's, and most importantly to be happy.

**A.N. Happy New Year! My New Year's resolutions are to get fit, update more, and finish Dead Sexy Society, fingers crossed I get them all done. I hope everyone had a great 2011 and have an even better 2012! **

**-C**


	177. Multiple Choice

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 176: Multiple Choice**

How To Cram for Exams Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Sleep with your textbooks. It works!

Todd: Prep really hard for everything except your english exam, you can easily fake that and still get a good mark. Especially because you're pretty sure Keating sees your name on the page and just gives you a 93%.

Charlie: Stay up all night to study and end up falling asleep halfway through your exam. Oh irony though art a heartless bitch.

Knox: HIGHLIGHT EVERTHING! Because somehow colouring things in makes it look like you might actually be learning something

Cameron: Freak out when your teacher doesn't give you a review with specific questions to study but rather a vague list of topics. Actually try to get them fired over this.

Meeks: Write everything you need to know down on cue cards and carry them around with you all the time. Seriously, if someone tries to take them from you, you will flip out.

Pitts: Remember whatever random little fact was the bonus question but accidentally misspell your name on the exam. Well you win some you loose some.

**A.N. I wrote this while desperately waiting for a computer so I could work on my final projects. Oh the wonders of exam season. **

**-C**

**P.S. You know I've written a lot of these when I start worrying that I've done them before. I know I did a test one, and I think a cheating one but I think this is different because exams make everyone crazy. **


	178. You'll Regret This When You're Older

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 177: You'll Regret This When You're Older**

How To Get a Tattoo Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Get a tattoo on your lower back because you think it's a classy location. Too later find out about the concept of a tramp stamp.

Todd: Pretend to be drunk and make a comment about it being a bet so the tattoo artist will refuse to have it done. Because it's easier than trying to explain to Neil that you don't want matching tattoos.

Charlie: Get one of those finger mustache tattoos, because that'll _never_ grow old and doesn't make you look like a pretentious hipster at all.

Knox: Get your name tattooed onto the back of your hand. It could be really useful if you ever get amnesia...or get murdered.

Cameron: Just get a temporary tattoo and say it's some sort of weird skin condition when it just starts to flake off.

Meeks: Ask the guy in the back to pretend to give you something on your back and then claim you can't show anyone because it's in a private area.

Pitts: Get really sweet henna on your hands and tell everyone it's a tradition that you don't have to do any chores until it wears off. Which works great until someone points out that's a tradition for brides.

**A.N. Corky, you know what you did. Thank you. **

**-C**


	179. No Back Butts

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 178: No Back Butts**

How To Wait in Line Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Alternate between being chivalrous and letting others go before you and charming your way to the front of the line.

Todd: Keep having people cut in front of you because they don't realize you're even standing there.

Charlie: Complaining loudly about having to wait in the hopes that others will get out of the line up to avoid you. Even if they don't at least they have to suffer too.

Knox: Bargain your way to the front of the line. Though now you are going to have to invite everyone to your birthday party. And be their best friend.

Cameron: Let it slip to whomever is in charge exactly who your father is. If that doesn't work slip them some money.

Meeks: Calculate based on the number of people in the line, the ammount of people joining the line, and the event they are lined up for when to come back to avoid having to wait in a line at all.

Pitts: Call it a queue. Just because everything sounds suddenly exciting if it's British!

**A.N. While at the movie theatre to see the Hunger Games I saw a sign about how people couldn't sit down in line because it was a fire hazard. Thus it inspired this. **

**-C**


	180. Corners First

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 179: Corners First**

How To Solve a Rubik's Cube Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Say you liked the unsolved cube better because it's more artistic looking and a good metaphor for life. That's also the excuse you use when you throw it at the wall in frustration.

Todd: Impress everyone you know by solving it in under 10 minutes. Fail to inform anyone that you learned the pattern and are just mimicing the steps. Let them wonder.

Charlie: Mix the squares up from it's original solved state, you're bored already.

Knox: Paint the squares when no one is looking.

Cameron: Never mix up the squares. Tell everyone you got it like that in a few minutes, technically it's not a lie.

Meeks: Buy one for stress relief. Get more stressed by your inability to solve it.

Pitts: You find the regular way too easy and decide to create a new pattern you have to solve. All solids is so last year.

**A.N. When I was a kid I removed the stickers from a Rubik's cube and re-stuck them on in the right places. It was obvious I had done that but at the time I felt like a genius. **

**-C**


	181. Do Not Pass Go

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 180: Do Not Pass Go **

How To Go To Jail Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Get confused when no one seems to realize who you are. You're Neil Perry, you don't do things that get you put in jail!

Todd: After bailing someone else accidentally get locked in the empty cell and left because no one noticed you were in there.

Charlie: While attempting to bail out Knox end up getting involved in a small breakout and having to get bailed out yourself.

Knox: Waste your one phonecall calling for thai takeout because you were ridiculously hungry and it somehow didn't seem like such a bad idea at the time.

Cameron: Try to slip an officer a few hundred dollars and end up getting charged with attempting to impede justice.

Meeks: Verbal berate an officer to the point of tears after being mistaken for someone named Stephen Meeks. Amatuers.

Pitts: Through a combination of interpretative dance and sheer charisma raise to the top of the criminal underbelly. Though this belly is mostly filled with people who didn't pay their speeding tickets and stoned high school students.

**A.N. Thank you to Eliza Ghost who is lovely and came up with the idea for this chapter because after 179 it's hard being original**

**-C**


	182. Little Bundle of Joy

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 181: Little Bundle of Joy **

How To Name Your Baby Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Name your baby after Mr. Keating as a token of your appreciation on the lessons he taught you about nonconformity. Which is great until you hear Charlie, Knox, and Pitts did the same thing.

Todd: Get complimented on the original name you came up with for your child. What actually happened was you panicked and picked an object in the room at random.

Charlie: Make a list of all the really unique, often adjective or noun names that you love. It becomes confusing when you can't tell which one is a list you wrote to brainstorm and which one is baby names.

Knox: Get so nervous signing the birth certificate that you end up misspelling the name and your kid has to go through life explaining why there's a silent Z in their name.

Cameron: Want to continue the family name but Richard Cameron the Fourth doesn't sound particularly good. Name them Richard Cameron the Third the Second instead.

Meeks: Spend weeks compiling data on common names, popular names, disliked names, the names of CEO's and celebrities. Fill books with notes on the favourites for each gender all colour-coded accordingly. When the baby comes pick a name that's not even on the list because they look like one.

Pitts: Be one of those uber cool parents who let's their kid pick their name when they're 4 or 5. Which is great only now you have a nameless child for 5 years.

**A.N. Sometimes I worry that I'll use up all the names I like in fic and then I won't have any left to name any possible future children. **

**-C**


	183. The General Assembly

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 182: The General Assembly**

How To Do Model UN Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Spend more time on your nations costume and perfecting your accent than planning your speeches. Which turns out to get you tons of points. Who cares about policy when you sound properly Norwegian?

Todd: Beg to be Luxembourg, so you don't have to say anything. No one cares what Luxembourg thinks.

Charlie: Get ratted out by a page for sending a note that says "Hey Pakistan nice ass, xoxo China". Which is completely politically accurate by the way, everyone knows Pakistan and China are bff's.

Knox: Completely fail to see the irony in being a rich well-fed white kid representing a impoverished African nation. Though in your defense _all_ the impoverished African nations were represented by rich well-fed white kids.

Cameron: Realize way to late the reason you're Iran is so everyone has an excuse to get up and leave everytime you try and say something.

Meeks: Get kicked out half-way through for pointing out that people are taking this way too seriously for a fake version of a mostly symbolic organization. Which pretty much proves your point.

Pitts: Forget to pick the right title once you find out the gender of the President and accidentally address them as Mister/Madam President.

**A.N. Prepping for Model UN all this week. Well fed white kid as Zambia represent! **

**-C**


	184. As The Crow Flies

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 183: As The Crow Flies**

How To Draw A Map Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Sing the 'I'm a map, I'm a map, I'm a map,' song the whole time your drawing. Which is probably an indicator that you need to stop babysitting your cousins so much.

Todd: Always carry around chart paper and a scale ruler so you can avoid ever having to give verbal directions in favour of drawing a map instead.

Charlie: Use landmarks instead of street names to label your map. Which is fine until they paint the house blue on 'The Street with the Yellow House'.

Knox: Get confused about what you're drawing and have to go back and make corrections so many times you're pretty sure they'd be better off just guessing how to get there.

Cameron: Become insanely fixated with having the correct scale. Which is a bit ridiculous because the assignment was to draw a map for a fictional place so there isn't any real scale to base it on.

Meeks: Complain that drawing maps is archaic and that GPS's are the future. Even if they do occasionally drive you off the road.

Pitts: Get confused about what you're supposed to do and try instead to draw a maze in a minute that takes two minutes to solve.

**A.N. E-Clementine your chapter is coming soon I promise!**

**-C**


	185. Good Old Golden Rule Days

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 184: Good Old Golden Rule Days**

How To Go Back to School Shopping Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Try and match all your binder colours to the subjects. Spend half an hour trying to decide whether history is green or blue before realizing they only have binders in black.

Todd: Receive several new packages of pens which you'll never actually use because you don't see the need to own more than one pen at a time.

Charlie: Refuse to buy lined paper. _The Man_ is always trying to force you to conform and you reject that on principle. Also now there won't be any annoying lines through your drawings of breasts.

Knox: Give the lady at the cash the stink eye when she informs you the Batman backpack you picked out is intended for children aged 6-12. Intended ages have never stopped you before and they're not about to stop you now.

Cameron: Go to seven different stores to find the type of pen you like. You're not someone who'll just settle for anything. You have standards!

Meeks: Spend most of the trip trying to convince your mother that those recommended shopping lists are just ways for the store to make more money. No self-respecting 16 year-old student needs pencil crayons or a four pack of glue sticks.

Pitts: Complain that having to buy a whole geometry set just to get the protractor is some sort of government scheme. When was the last time anyone _actually_ used a compass?

* * *

**A.N. This was KatzillaM's idea and a wonderful one at that. **

**-C**


	186. Rainbow Flag

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 185: Rainbow Flag**

How To Come out of the Closet Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Prepare a dramatic and heart-warming monologue about how you cannot lie to yourself anymore. Instead of tears and applause someone shouts: "Yeah, duh, we all knew!"

Todd: You really didn't have much say in the matter since Neil's dramatic monologue was mostly about you.

Charlie: Come out of the closet by bringing a boy _into_ the closet to play seven minutes of heaven. Works everytime.

Knox: You never even realized that gay had another meaning until you turned to Chris, looked lovingly into her eyes, and said "Chris, you've made me so gay."

Cameron: Tell your parents that despite being a boy you should get a coming out party. It's not your fault they misinterpreted this into a rainbow-filled monstrosity.

Meeks: Spring the news on your parents just so they'll stop trying to set you up. Instead now they're trying to find you a nice boy.

Pitts: Get congratulated on being so brave and standing up for your love. You actually just really like rainbows but since there isn't any problem with being gay you never bothered correcting anyone.

**A.N. Firstly thanks to E-Clementine, I know it took forever darling I apologize profusely. Secondly sorry I've gone missing. My old computer died on me so please be patient while I transfer everything over to my new machine. **

**-C**


	187. Nightmares

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 186: Nightmares**

* * *

How To Go To A Haunted House Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Beg everyone to go in with you but end up completely wrapped around Todd with your eyes closed by the end.

Todd: Have to help navigate a pack of 4 terrified teenage boys who are all clinging to you through a haunted house because you're the only one with your eyes still open.

Charlie: Try and scare other people as you go through but end up getting left behind and terrified.

Knox: Get so nervous in line that you start hyperventilating and some dude dressed as a zombie won't let you go through.

Cameron: Get at the back of the line and sneak off so you don't have to go in. When you reappear at the end claim it 'wasn't that bad'.

Meeks: Strategically place yourself in the middle of the pack so you're less likely to have someone try to grab onto you to scare you. Though that sort of fails when everyone in front of and behind you holds on for dear life.

Pitts: Apologize to the guy who jumped out to scare you because your mother raised you right.

* * *

**A.N. The Knox thing actually is something that happened to me. He was a pretty chill Zombie dude. **

**-C**


	188. Door Crashers

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 187: Door Crashers**

How To Go Black Friday Shopping Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Come up with a detailed list and schedule to maximize deals and minimize time spend shopping. You're all set to go when you realize you've been in a food coma for 48 hours and it's actually Saturday.

Todd: Use your amazing powers of not talking a lot and staying out of the way to get in and out with amazing deals and with only minor injuries.

Charlie: Seize this as an opportunity to try and crowd-surf. Or get trampled. Either or.

Knox: You're legally not allowed to leave the house on Black Friday after the nose bleed debacle of 57.

Cameron: Refuse to go because Black Friday is a ridiculous show of over-consumerism and mob mentality. Also you're really afraid of crowds.

Meeks: Go shopping at the end of November? You've been done since October.

Pitts: Delegate yourself sheriff of Black Friday and help deserving people get their waffle irons back from screechy suburban moms.

**A.N. It's weird because we've never really had Black Friday in Canada (we have Boxing Day instead) and all of a sudden this year it seems like people are really doing it. It's very strange and thus fic-able. **

**-C**


	189. Up In The Air

**Disclaimer: I do not own DPS...yet. **

**How To Live Like A Dead Poet:**

**Chapter 188: Up In The Air**

How To Go To The Airport Like A Dead Poet :

Neil: Realize that you've spent almost all of your spending money in the souvenir place at the airport. Which isn't even that bad until you're informed that your snowglobes are against the rules concerning liquids and you have to leave all 42 behind.

Todd: Practically have a panic attack while going through security because the snaps on your shirt set off the alarm. Though you're relieved, some of the other people going through security seem upset that you don't have to take it off.

Charlie: Get put on the no-fly list because you got into a huge fight with security because your hair products are against the rules for liquids. To be honest though, it was worth it to maintain your look.

Knox: Buy half a dozen trashy romance novels to keep yourself busy while you're waiting for your flight. Though you get rid of them on the plane when the middle-aged woman beside you is reading the same one.

Cameron: Ignore that stupid warning that you should never leave your bags unattended and end up having the bomb squad confiscate your luggage.

Meeks: Make sure you get to the airport really early because you're paranoid, only to have that you fall asleep while waiting and miss your flight completely.

Pitts: Wear an oversized hoodie and sunglasses while lurking around the airport like you're paranoid to make other people think you're a celebrity in disguise.

**A.N. Credit for this idea goes to Sapphire Sunsets. Also one time the snaps on my shirt did set off the metal detector. It was awful. **

**-C**


End file.
